What If They Are Lying?

WEBVTT100:00:00.040 --> 00:00:05.120I've had people stop in the drivewayand make up a pretty extravagant lie and200:00:05.160 --> 00:00:08.400I ask myself, why don't theyjust keep driving in a normal it's because300:00:08.439 --> 00:00:14.640of guilt. That's why I amyours, I am yours, I am400:00:14.759 --> 00:00:21.000yours, and me Lord, Iam yours, I am yours. I'm500:00:21.000 --> 00:00:26.039welcome to the Gospel Center pro lifepodcast, a podcast design to equip,600:00:26.280 --> 00:00:30.600encourage and challenge you in pro lifeministry, and always with a focus on700:00:30.600 --> 00:00:39.640the Gospel. Stay tuned. Ifelt show passish, touch your heart.800:00:41.799 --> 00:00:48.799Use Me. Welcome back to theGospel Centered Prolife podcast. Appreciate you guys900:00:48.880 --> 00:00:52.880joining us and, as always,we'd appreciate if you guys would share this1000:00:52.920 --> 00:00:58.159podcast episode with friends, family sharedon social media. We normally put these1100:00:58.159 --> 00:01:06.120episodes out on various social media andthings like that, normally in groups and1200:01:06.120 --> 00:01:10.040stuff that were that we're part of. But yeah, you can feel free1300:01:10.079 --> 00:01:14.640to share these publicly and encourage peopleto listen to these episodes. Also,1400:01:14.680 --> 00:01:19.799we encourage you guys to leave usa review. If you're on apple podcast1500:01:21.000 --> 00:01:26.200or whatever podcast platform you're on,there's likely some way to leave a review,1600:01:26.239 --> 00:01:27.879and so if you could just letus know what you think of these1700:01:27.879 --> 00:01:33.400podcasts and will give our email addressesat the end of this episode so you1800:01:33.400 --> 00:01:36.840can reach out to us and letus know some suggestions that you have for1900:01:36.959 --> 00:01:41.319future podcast episodes. We've taken afew suggestions and put them in the episodes.2000:01:41.439 --> 00:01:44.840We'd love to hear from you.We like to, if we don't2100:01:44.840 --> 00:01:48.319forget, introduce ourselves for those whoare new to the podcast. So I2200:01:48.359 --> 00:01:52.920am Daniel Parks. I work withlove life as the regional shepherd of the2300:01:52.920 --> 00:01:56.959West Coast, so oversee our effortson the west coast and also have an2400:01:56.959 --> 00:02:01.439expertise with air quotes in sidewalk outreach ministry. been doing sidewalk out reach2500:02:01.560 --> 00:02:07.120for about a little over fifteen yearsnow and with me often times, is2600:02:07.159 --> 00:02:12.280a matter of fact, almost allthe time, is Vicky cassie Org and2700:02:12.360 --> 00:02:15.000so introduce yourself. Say Hey,hey, there and Vicky. I've been2800:02:15.080 --> 00:02:21.199on the sidewalk only nine years.Yeah, so not not nearly as experienced2900:02:21.319 --> 00:02:24.199or an expert as Daniel Parks.Yeah, I don't know that. I3000:02:24.199 --> 00:02:30.800think probably more and of an expertin this realm of ministry than I am.3100:02:30.800 --> 00:02:38.039But together we, I think,form a dynamic duo in encouraging people3200:02:38.080 --> 00:02:42.479and equipping people in sidewalk out reachministry, which is what we intend to3300:02:42.520 --> 00:02:46.080do with this episode. And maybe, if your brand new to sidewalk out3400:02:46.080 --> 00:02:51.520reach ministry, this subject is goingto be a little unique, maybe a3500:02:51.520 --> 00:02:54.479little strange, like why would webe talking about this? But we're talking3600:02:54.520 --> 00:02:58.560about this because it's a common thing. And so what are we talking about?3700:02:58.560 --> 00:03:01.560We're talking about what if the MOMthat you've stopped is lying? You3800:03:01.919 --> 00:03:05.800know she's lying, you can tellshe's lying. What do you do?3900:03:05.879 --> 00:03:07.240How do you deal with that?And that actually was a question one of4000:03:07.280 --> 00:03:12.439our councilors asked because, like yousaid, it happens all the time.4100:03:12.680 --> 00:03:16.080Yeah, they're they're, you know, ashamed of what they're doing there,4200:03:16.080 --> 00:03:21.599and so we here lies all thetime. And how do we get our4300:03:21.599 --> 00:03:24.520message across, God's message across,if we know that they're lying? Yeah,4400:03:24.719 --> 00:03:29.319yeah, which, again is acommon scenario. A woman's pulling into4500:03:29.360 --> 00:03:32.599the abortion center or walking up tothe abortion center, you stop to give4600:03:32.639 --> 00:03:38.360them information. Are you here foran abortion? And right away the lie4700:03:38.439 --> 00:03:40.000could come out. No, I'mnot here for that, and that is4800:03:40.000 --> 00:03:43.719a very common scenario. Actually,no, I'm not here for that.4900:03:43.800 --> 00:03:46.080Now you'd be surprised at how manyof them would actually say, yes,5000:03:46.120 --> 00:03:49.879I'm here for an abortion, right. And so, yeah, we're going5100:03:49.879 --> 00:03:53.240to talk about how you cut throughthat, how you cut through the lies5200:03:53.319 --> 00:03:58.520and get right to the truth,some ways maybe to detect that they're lying5300:03:58.599 --> 00:04:00.800to you. We're going to we'regoing to help people, Vicki, to5400:04:00.919 --> 00:04:04.159be lie detectors. Yeah, WE'REgonna. We're going to be able to5500:04:04.199 --> 00:04:08.199quit them to do that. Willbe able to equip them to some degree.5600:04:08.199 --> 00:04:11.360Okay, it is easier if you'reat a facility like the one we5700:04:11.400 --> 00:04:14.400are at here at Latrobe, becauseall they do here is abortions, and5800:04:14.479 --> 00:04:15.839that's that's often the first thing I'llsay when they say, Oh, I'm5900:04:15.879 --> 00:04:18.720not here for an abortion. I'llsay, oh well, that's all they6000:04:18.879 --> 00:04:23.319do here. Yeah, and andthen they kind of turn all read and6100:04:23.600 --> 00:04:26.600right. Yeah, you can't dothat if it's a plan parenthood, because6200:04:26.639 --> 00:04:30.680you do do other things besides abortion. Yes, they do. So,6300:04:30.759 --> 00:04:34.839but we will give some ideas forhow to expose lies. Sometimes exposing the6400:04:34.879 --> 00:04:39.439lie is actually not the best strategy, right. Is is what we have6500:04:39.480 --> 00:04:44.120found him. We're going to talkabout that right, but I mean exposing6600:04:44.160 --> 00:04:47.720the fact that you know that they'relying, without directly calling them a liar,6700:04:47.759 --> 00:04:53.399is sometimes very positive because it's biblical. The Bible says the truth will6800:04:53.439 --> 00:04:59.800set you free, not lies.Lies will only sin hides in darkness.6900:04:59.879 --> 00:05:03.680Right. So there are definitely importantpoints at which lies should be exposed.7000:05:04.000 --> 00:05:08.160Yeah, so, so, yeah, we want to help you in this7100:05:08.240 --> 00:05:13.360article. We have an accompanying article, as we usually do, but we7200:05:13.399 --> 00:05:19.360want to we want to help youknow when it is important to expose a7300:05:19.399 --> 00:05:28.079lie and and at what point ina conversation it is important to expose a7400:05:28.120 --> 00:05:30.839lie. And then, really,thirdly, how to expose a lie?7500:05:31.040 --> 00:05:34.079Yeah, yeah, that that's infact where we start. Really, how7600:05:34.120 --> 00:05:38.959do we how do we expose yeah, lies, let's let's jump into it.7700:05:38.959 --> 00:05:41.600How do we expose these lies?Now I would say, first and7800:05:41.639 --> 00:05:47.480foremost, people who are going tokill their children. For them, lying7900:05:47.680 --> 00:05:50.720is not a far leap, right, so that at all. We want8000:05:50.720 --> 00:05:55.839to believe the best, right,and we understand these women are in fear8100:05:55.879 --> 00:06:00.839and people try to protect themselves asa human mechanism. When we're fraid,8200:06:00.000 --> 00:06:04.199right, we do things to helpprotect ourselves, and so sometimes we lie,8300:06:04.279 --> 00:06:08.079at least can be tempted to lie. We're trying to protect ourselves,8400:06:08.160 --> 00:06:11.600but just be aware. Again,we want to believe the best, but8500:06:11.720 --> 00:06:15.240be aware that it's very likely thewoman that you stop is going to lie8600:06:15.279 --> 00:06:18.720to you in some way. Yeah, it's not a good thing, I8700:06:18.720 --> 00:06:24.199will just say right right away.and talking about exposing lies, to say8800:06:24.240 --> 00:06:27.959you're lying, right, that's that'sthat will not the most. We help8900:06:27.959 --> 00:06:31.160the conversation to continue. Yeah,yeah, and so how do we expose9000:06:31.199 --> 00:06:34.800those lives? Yeah, I thinkwe have said this so many times.9100:06:34.800 --> 00:06:41.160One of the very best counseling techniquesask questions. Yeah, usually the lie9200:06:41.240 --> 00:06:45.639will be exposed. They will tripthemselves up because it's hard to keep a9300:06:45.680 --> 00:06:50.040whole series of flies right going.So if you ask a lot of questions,9400:06:50.160 --> 00:06:55.959you don't even need to say you'vebeen that you've been caught in a9500:06:56.000 --> 00:07:00.920lie. Yeah, at some pointthere's going to be a contradiction and I9600:07:00.959 --> 00:07:08.399will sometimes just let that contradiction sitthere right, because they I they know9700:07:08.839 --> 00:07:12.920that I now know, yeah,that they're lying. And if I'm still9800:07:12.920 --> 00:07:17.560gentle compassionate, still offering help,and hope I've just gotten some Brownie points9900:07:17.680 --> 00:07:25.879right in relationship building and and theyare not able to continue in that lie10000:07:26.000 --> 00:07:30.160and they will sometimes just switch theninto telling me the truth. Usually it10100:07:30.519 --> 00:07:33.800goes from Oh, I'm not herefor an abortion to I can't have this10200:07:33.839 --> 00:07:39.120baby. There there are really thereare really important reasons, yeah, for10300:07:39.240 --> 00:07:43.839why I can't have the child.Right. So, some of the questions10400:07:43.879 --> 00:07:46.800that I don't know if that's atechnique that you use. Yeah, absolutely10500:07:46.879 --> 00:07:50.839nice. But yeah, and likeyou, I'm not going to just point10600:07:50.839 --> 00:07:55.399out when I see a blatant contradictionor a lie. Yeah, and just10700:07:55.439 --> 00:08:00.920point culture you're yea, do youyou're lying. I'll just be gracious and10800:08:00.959 --> 00:08:03.959I'll just keep going right for thetruth. You, in the scenario where10900:08:03.959 --> 00:08:09.399a woman's coming to the abortion center, I can tell because the the demeanor11000:08:09.480 --> 00:08:13.360on her face, I can tellbecause of the fear in her eyes,11100:08:13.600 --> 00:08:16.639I can tell because of the waythat she's dressed. If she's dressed in11200:08:16.759 --> 00:08:20.560loose fitting clothing and she's going toa medical facility, she's probably going for11300:08:20.600 --> 00:08:26.240a surgical procedure. And so evenif she would say something to the effect11400:08:26.279 --> 00:08:28.959of I'm not here for that,I'm still going to keep speaking like she11500:08:30.120 --> 00:08:31.840is yeah, I'm still going tokeep I'm just going to roll with it,11600:08:31.919 --> 00:08:35.320right, and put it in theLord's hands. Yeah, I'm not11700:08:35.320 --> 00:08:37.600going to call her a liar,but I'm going to if I if all11800:08:37.639 --> 00:08:41.559the other indications, rather than whatshe is saying, indicate that she's there11900:08:41.559 --> 00:08:46.159for an abortion. I'm going tokeep talking about the three talking points with12000:08:46.320 --> 00:08:48.840God says, manage you every babyand the resources that are available. Yeah,12100:08:48.879 --> 00:08:52.120you've just said, but I believeis probably the most important point of12200:08:52.159 --> 00:08:56.840the whole this whole topic. Yeah, is no matter whether they're lying or12300:08:56.879 --> 00:09:01.519not, no matter whether the liehas been exposed, you're not use stay12400:09:01.639 --> 00:09:05.639focused on getting out the information thatyou would have gotten out anyway. So,12500:09:05.720 --> 00:09:09.120for example, they'll sometimes say I'mhere for a friend. I'll often12600:09:09.200 --> 00:09:13.039hear that I was not for me. I'm picking someone up and and they're12700:09:13.080 --> 00:09:16.159not it is for them. Wellthen I'll still hand them the information and12800:09:16.240 --> 00:09:20.240say, can you give this toyour friend? Let me tell you what12900:09:20.279 --> 00:09:24.039we do. Yeah, and thenI speak as though I'm speaking for the13000:09:24.039 --> 00:09:28.120things will do for the friend,but I'm giving her all the information I13100:09:28.120 --> 00:09:33.200would have given her anyway. Butso some of the questions that that I13200:09:33.279 --> 00:09:37.000might ask just in case someone strugglingwith this like, well, what do13300:09:37.039 --> 00:09:39.879we ask? What do we askthat help to expose the lie? Did13400:09:39.919 --> 00:09:46.519you know that this Phillis facility doesabortions? Because right away you're like opening13500:09:46.559 --> 00:09:50.120up the fact that we suspect thatthey are there. Right, we're an13600:09:50.159 --> 00:09:56.840abortion. Here's one and I haveheard this a lot for people driving into13700:09:56.840 --> 00:10:00.440Plant parenthood. They'll say, oh, she's just getting birth control pills.13800:10:00.600 --> 00:10:03.679Sometimes we'll hear that from the father, or or she's just having a pep13900:10:03.720 --> 00:10:09.279smere. Yeah, and then wecan ask, well, why does she14000:10:09.320 --> 00:10:11.919need you? FOR MORAL SUPPORT?Yeah, for she's just here for if14100:10:11.960 --> 00:10:16.720she's just control exactly. It doesn'tmake any sense if they're coming there with14200:10:16.240 --> 00:10:22.240with a driver. Right, areyou married to her? Is a good14300:10:22.320 --> 00:10:26.799question because, and the reason that'sa good question, I think. Maybe14400:10:26.840 --> 00:10:28.440not the first question I would askfor sure, but it's one of the14500:10:28.480 --> 00:10:33.399questions. Is it points out they'llsay, Oh, I'm a Christian.14600:10:33.480 --> 00:10:37.039Yeah, that's when I that's whenI say it usually is when they they14700:10:37.039 --> 00:10:39.120oh, I would never do that, I'm a Christian. Right. Oh,14800:10:39.240 --> 00:10:43.480is that your wife? Right,yeah, pointing out that if you're14900:10:43.480 --> 00:10:48.720a Christian and you're having sex outsideof marriage, then obviously you're not a15000:10:48.759 --> 00:10:52.759consistent Christian, consistent with the Bibleteaches. Yeah, which I think is15100:10:52.799 --> 00:10:56.639a very important point to join out. You're planning seeds, right. Yeah,15200:10:56.720 --> 00:11:01.799the conviction of the Holy Spirit cancome. And even if they're lying15300:11:01.879 --> 00:11:05.639about going in for an abortion,right, but they're the conviction of the15400:11:05.679 --> 00:11:09.039Holy Spirit comes because of their sexoutside of marriage. It can just it15500:11:09.080 --> 00:11:13.840brings the knowledge of God into theequation. It brings the truth of God,15600:11:13.879 --> 00:11:16.720it brings God's standards into the equation, which ultimately, hopefully translates into15700:11:16.759 --> 00:11:22.919God's standard not just about sex outsideof marriage but about murder. Right.15800:11:22.000 --> 00:11:26.919Yeah, and you can, youcan actually start a little talk about sexual15900:11:28.000 --> 00:11:31.399purity before the Lord through that onequestion. If they say I am not16000:11:31.519 --> 00:11:33.879married, well, and you don'thave to say it in a judgmental or16100:11:33.960 --> 00:11:37.240condemning way. Oh, did didyou know? Do you know how the16200:11:37.279 --> 00:11:41.440Bible speaks? Yeah, that oftentimesI'll say no and then I I'll pull16300:11:41.639 --> 00:11:46.320some verses. Yeah, so aswe're talking about what if they're lying?16400:11:46.399 --> 00:11:48.480Yeah, a lot of the scenariosthat we encounter, some of them are16500:11:48.519 --> 00:11:52.639the women actually going into the abortioncenter, but many of them are the16600:11:52.639 --> 00:11:54.960boyfriend or the friend, as youguys can come to detect, and the16700:11:56.039 --> 00:12:00.039questions that were asking, not thewoman. We're asking these questions to a16800:12:00.120 --> 00:12:03.200least not all of these questions.Sometimes, again, it's the boyfriend of16900:12:03.200 --> 00:12:07.240the husband or the friend or familymember or whatever. Right. And so17000:12:07.200 --> 00:12:11.600I think with all of the thingsthat we do, as far as reaching17100:12:11.600 --> 00:12:13.960out of the abortion centers or whetherit be signs, calling out, handing17200:12:15.000 --> 00:12:18.240out literature, facetoface, conversations oneon one, car side, whatever,17300:12:18.519 --> 00:12:22.679all of those things are relationship building, right, and so we're building a17400:12:22.679 --> 00:12:26.799relationship. That's why we don't wantto immediately point out your liar. It's17500:12:26.799 --> 00:12:31.200good to help kind of bring thoselies to the surface so you can cut17600:12:31.200 --> 00:12:33.679through them and get to the truth. Yeah, but with the boyfriends,17700:12:33.679 --> 00:12:37.600if you can win them over ina conversation, if you can win them17800:12:37.720 --> 00:12:43.399over in a relational way, thenultimately they can win her over. Right,17900:12:43.480 --> 00:12:46.480and so if you can show them, okay, I know why you're18000:12:46.519 --> 00:12:48.399here. Let's let's just cut throughthe crap, right. I know why18100:12:48.519 --> 00:12:52.120you're here. You and her orhere for an abortion, but I'm going18200:12:52.120 --> 00:12:56.600to. I'm a compassionate person thatcares about your situation. And you're doing18300:12:56.639 --> 00:13:00.679this through a relationship. You're doingthis through exposing lies, but graciously,18400:13:01.200 --> 00:13:05.799not poking your finger in their eyeand telling them they're a liar. Yeah,18500:13:05.960 --> 00:13:09.519you can eventually win them over.You can eventually get that guy to18600:13:09.559 --> 00:13:13.399go in there. We'll get herto come out and talk with me.18700:13:13.639 --> 00:13:16.200Yeah, and so it's relationship building. Yeah, really, yeah, and18800:13:16.240 --> 00:13:20.120exposing lies. It can be relationshipbuilding. Yeah, it can be,18900:13:20.159 --> 00:13:24.360as long as you do it ina gentle and loving way. Yeah.19000:13:24.360 --> 00:13:30.799Well, asking if if it's eithera friend or a father, right,19100:13:30.919 --> 00:13:33.840do you know? Is She pregnant? Yeah, and and then sometimes they19200:13:33.840 --> 00:13:37.159will say yes, and if it'sa guy, I'll say, well,19300:13:37.320 --> 00:13:39.919is that? Is that your baby? Yeah, because again, you want19400:13:39.919 --> 00:13:46.600to personalize that, humanize that baby, or whether it's a friend or the19500:13:46.679 --> 00:13:50.600father or even the mom yourself.The next one of the questions will almost19600:13:50.639 --> 00:13:54.759always ask is, do you knowhow far along you are or she is?19700:13:54.000 --> 00:13:58.759Yeah, and that that point theyoften will say I don't know,19800:13:58.159 --> 00:14:01.799yeah, or if they do know, but at that point either way about19900:14:01.879 --> 00:14:07.600it. Listing the developmental milestones,particularly in the first trimester. Yeah,20000:14:07.639 --> 00:14:11.799it is really a good thing todo. Yeah, in answer to that20100:14:11.879 --> 00:14:18.440question, right. Yeah, I'mthinking right now of several conversations I've had20200:14:18.480 --> 00:14:22.559with young men at the abortion centers. And we know, again here at20300:14:22.559 --> 00:14:24.720the latrobe abortion center, we knowthat they're here for an abortion. That's20400:14:24.799 --> 00:14:28.200all they do. So even thoughwe ask the question, are you here20500:14:28.200 --> 00:14:31.639for an abortion, we already knowthe answer in a sense, unless they're20600:14:31.679 --> 00:14:37.399there for a follow up. ButI've had several conversations with young men when20700:14:37.440 --> 00:14:39.399I'm asking them, is she herefor an abortion, and they say now,20800:14:39.720 --> 00:14:43.559she's not here for that, wedon't believe in that. And then20900:14:43.600 --> 00:14:46.879a few sentences later I'll ask thequestion, so how far long is she21000:14:48.360 --> 00:14:50.519and then he'll tell me she's tenweeks or whatever, and then I'll ask21100:14:50.519 --> 00:14:54.080the question, you know what abortionprocedure she's going to be doing? You21200:14:54.159 --> 00:14:58.440know, I'm like ignoring previously whenhe said she's not there fro an abortion,21300:14:58.480 --> 00:15:03.039because I know that she is right. Sometimes you have to be aware21400:15:03.159 --> 00:15:07.080as well, though, so onlyfinish that thought. So I asked them21500:15:07.120 --> 00:15:11.759what procedures she here for, andthe he'll start talking about the abortion peel21600:15:11.960 --> 00:15:13.279and there she's here, as Ithinks she's here, she's going to take21700:15:13.279 --> 00:15:16.799the pill. So in essence,a lot of times what people do when21800:15:16.840 --> 00:15:20.600they talk about instead of doing thesurgical abortion, they take the abortion pills.21900:15:20.639 --> 00:15:22.600are trying to make it less likean abortion, right, and they're22000:15:22.639 --> 00:15:26.759trying to save face in one sense. But I have encountered situations talking to22100:15:26.840 --> 00:15:31.399men that genuinely believe that she's notthere for an abortion because she has lied22200:15:31.480 --> 00:15:35.360to him. That is true.Yea, that is true. That's a22300:15:35.440 --> 00:15:43.639different scenario, right, and inthat case I will be probably more forthright22400:15:43.720 --> 00:15:46.360if I have figured out that they'vebeen lied to and I you know,22500:15:46.399 --> 00:15:48.440I can't think of anything specifically.Maybe I will be for the end of22600:15:48.440 --> 00:15:52.799this podcast, but I will bemore direct. Well, all they do22700:15:52.840 --> 00:15:58.080here is abortion. Yeah, tolet the guy know, maybe you need22800:15:58.159 --> 00:16:00.000to go in there and get herout, have a you know, bring22900:16:00.000 --> 00:16:03.480her over to us. But yeah, that's that's a really important point,23000:16:03.519 --> 00:16:07.679because sometimes that does happen. Yeah, its oftentimes that happens with Uber Drivers.23100:16:07.840 --> 00:16:11.519To write. Don't know that they'redropping them for her for any organ23200:16:11.600 --> 00:16:15.159then, you know, kind ofalong these lines were talking like we do23300:16:15.200 --> 00:16:18.480a lot about our experiences here atthe trouble abortion center, but we've had23400:16:18.480 --> 00:16:22.000experiences that. Plenty of other abortioncenters reaching out there too, and a23500:16:22.080 --> 00:16:27.559plant parenthood facilities and other facilities thatdo things other than just abortions. Still23600:16:27.639 --> 00:16:32.799yet there are days where they commonlydo surgical abortions. So at one of23700:16:32.840 --> 00:16:38.600our parenthoods that our team in southernCalifornia reaches out at, they their abortion23800:16:38.679 --> 00:16:44.679day, their surgical abortion day isFriday, and throughout the week they do23900:16:44.720 --> 00:16:47.480the abortion pills. It's really hardto know who's coming in for the abortion24000:16:47.480 --> 00:16:49.200peel, but there are still teams. They're reaching out. But on Friday's24100:16:49.240 --> 00:16:52.879we know they do surgical abortions.They get started very early and so you24200:16:52.960 --> 00:17:00.840can you can pretty much assume thatif they do their surgical abortions on Friday,24300:17:00.960 --> 00:17:06.680then there's a pretty concentrated group ofpeople coming to the abortion center.24400:17:06.720 --> 00:17:11.880So because the concern is maybe forthose listening is we don't want to make24500:17:11.920 --> 00:17:14.720assumptions and we don't want to justignore when they say they're not there for24600:17:14.720 --> 00:17:18.319an abortion, just to kind ofignore that and go for it. We24700:17:18.359 --> 00:17:19.839can do that here at La Trouebecause we know that they only do abortions24800:17:19.880 --> 00:17:25.480and you can you can do thatpretty confidently at a plant parenthood or whatever,24900:17:25.640 --> 00:17:29.759whatever other facility, if you knowwhat their abortion days are. Yeah,25000:17:29.839 --> 00:17:33.119because they're going to push because that'stheir bread and butter, that's how25100:17:33.119 --> 00:17:37.000they make their money. They're goingto push a lot of their patients and25200:17:37.039 --> 00:17:40.319they're going to probably take their otherpatients who are there for other things and25300:17:40.680 --> 00:17:44.400place them other days of the weekbecause they don't want to mess with the25400:17:44.400 --> 00:17:47.960abortion day. Right, they havelikely they have an abortionist that comes that25500:17:48.000 --> 00:17:51.680one day that does those surgical abortionprocedures and they want to make as much25600:17:51.720 --> 00:17:53.720money as possible, so they're goingto stack up the appointments. So if25700:17:53.759 --> 00:17:59.720there's an abortion day, a daythat they particularly do abortions, then you25800:17:59.759 --> 00:18:02.759can make that assumption as well thatthat woman is there for an abortion and25900:18:02.799 --> 00:18:06.319just keep speaking like she's there foran abortion. Right, if they come26000:18:06.359 --> 00:18:10.599as a couple, if she's carryinga blanket, is she's dressed in loose26100:18:10.680 --> 00:18:14.359clothes? Again, you gather theclues and so you probably have a pretty26200:18:14.359 --> 00:18:17.799good idea. Even at a planparenthood, not all the time, but26300:18:17.799 --> 00:18:22.160but some of the time. Yeah, pretty soon in the discussion with them,26400:18:22.160 --> 00:18:26.720I'm going to ask do you knowGod has as we're which as we're26500:18:26.720 --> 00:18:32.559trying to expose the lies and andfeed them the not feed them, but26600:18:32.599 --> 00:18:36.559give them the information that we reallyfeel as vital for them to make a26700:18:36.680 --> 00:18:40.039choice for life. That's one ofthe top ones for me. Do you26800:18:40.079 --> 00:18:45.480know God? Yeah, and andif earlier in the discussion I found out26900:18:45.519 --> 00:18:52.279they're not married and she's pregnant,then again that would be I'll ask the27000:18:52.359 --> 00:18:57.240question. Do you think God wouldhave you be in an intimate sexual relationship27100:18:57.480 --> 00:19:02.559if you're not married? Right?Does that cause you any concern? So27200:19:02.640 --> 00:19:06.519those questions are really important. Ioften get asked how do you introduce the27300:19:06.559 --> 00:19:11.079topic of sexual purity through questions?It's one of the ways that I will27400:19:11.119 --> 00:19:17.240do it because I think we cannotignore it. We just cannot ignore that27500:19:17.240 --> 00:19:22.279that aspect of why abortions take place. Yeah, and foreign above and beyond27600:19:22.440 --> 00:19:30.119any statistic, those come into abortioncenters aren't there because of sex outside of27700:19:30.119 --> 00:19:33.960marriage, because of sexual impurity.Yeah, what God calls fornication and the27800:19:33.960 --> 00:19:37.599word. Now you might run intopeople who don't believe in God at all.27900:19:37.680 --> 00:19:42.759Yeah, or at least we'll claimthat. or who really could care28000:19:42.839 --> 00:19:47.440less about what you have to sayabout sexual purity? Right, and then28100:19:47.480 --> 00:19:51.400I might. I'm I'm still goingto introduce those, but because you're always28200:19:51.400 --> 00:19:56.599planning seats. But then one ofthe things you can ask is d questions28300:19:56.599 --> 00:20:00.200about just general morality, like doyou believe it is good to take an28400:20:00.200 --> 00:20:04.759innocent baby's life, right, ordo you believe a stronger human being should28500:20:04.799 --> 00:20:10.160ever pray on a vulnerable human being? Yeah, so that you're kind of28600:20:10.240 --> 00:20:15.519leading them into, I guess,some more humanistic look at why abortion is28700:20:15.559 --> 00:20:22.319wrong, right. Yeah, andthat's helpful. Whether they're actually there for28800:20:22.319 --> 00:20:25.640an abortion or whether they're not,maybe they're genuinely telling the truth. It's28900:20:25.640 --> 00:20:30.440still good to establish a baseline ofGod's truth. Yeah, we're talking about29000:20:30.480 --> 00:20:33.720sexual purity, for sure, butalso when we're talking about the taking innocent29100:20:33.839 --> 00:20:37.359life. And I'm thinking in mymind just again of some conversations that I've29200:20:37.359 --> 00:20:41.480had with men and with women.Yeah, and so I'm thinking of a29300:20:41.480 --> 00:20:45.119particular conversation. I'm there in frontof an abortion center that does things other29400:20:45.160 --> 00:20:48.680than abortion, and a young ladieswalking into the abortion center. I'm trying29500:20:48.680 --> 00:20:51.680to give her information. This isa scenario in which they're walking in rather29600:20:51.720 --> 00:20:55.319than driving in. Right offering literature. He can I give you this information?29700:20:55.319 --> 00:20:56.559And the young lady says, well, I'm not here for that.29800:20:56.599 --> 00:21:00.480Now I didn't even say anything aboutabortion, but she knows while I'm out29900:21:00.480 --> 00:21:03.720there, I'm not here for thatand I would ask the question. Not30000:21:03.759 --> 00:21:06.519here for what? I'm not here. Her response I'm not here for an30100:21:06.519 --> 00:21:10.279abortion. So okay, what doyou know? They do abortions inside of30200:21:10.319 --> 00:21:15.200there, and she might say yes. I forget the exact conversation. I'm30300:21:15.279 --> 00:21:18.400thinking about what whether she said yesor no, but I said you know,30400:21:18.440 --> 00:21:22.240they do abortions inside of there,and then my next question is whether30500:21:22.279 --> 00:21:25.559she says yes or nose. Whatdo you feel about abortion? What do30600:21:25.559 --> 00:21:29.720you think about what they do insideof there? Now I'm still running with30700:21:29.759 --> 00:21:33.319the assumption, because it's an abortionday, that she's there for an abortion,30800:21:33.359 --> 00:21:34.880but I want to try to gether to engage with me about what30900:21:34.960 --> 00:21:38.839she thinks about abortion. Yeah,and in that scenario that young lady said31000:21:38.880 --> 00:21:42.279I I don't agree with abortion,but I'm not here for that. They're31100:21:42.279 --> 00:21:47.519always pretty Adam and I'm not herefor that, and so continue to engage31200:21:47.559 --> 00:21:49.799in the conversation. I'll say what'swrong with abortion. So I want to31300:21:49.799 --> 00:21:53.400get them to acknowledge that. They'reacknowledging that abortion is wrong. So,31400:21:53.559 --> 00:21:57.640whether she's there for an abortion ornot, I'm helping her to understand the31500:21:57.640 --> 00:22:02.720place that she's associated herself with killsbabies. I want to get to the31600:22:02.720 --> 00:22:06.400point. What's wrong with abortion?What's wrong with abortion is they're actually killing31700:22:06.480 --> 00:22:10.359children. Yeah, and so inthis particular conversation, I remember talking to31800:22:10.400 --> 00:22:12.319the young lady. This actually happenedin southern California. She's walking in.31900:22:12.400 --> 00:22:15.799She said, I'm not here forthat. What do you feel about abortion?32000:22:15.839 --> 00:22:19.359I don't agree with it. Andwhy is that? Because it takes32100:22:19.359 --> 00:22:22.640an innocent life. She acknowledged thatand I'm agreeing. Yeah, you're right,32200:22:22.680 --> 00:22:26.880it takes an innocent life and that'swhat they're doing inside of there.32300:22:26.000 --> 00:22:30.440So, whether you hear for thator not, your associated with the killing32400:22:30.440 --> 00:22:36.359of innocent babies. Yeah, whatif they held Klu Klux Klan meetings inside32500:22:36.359 --> 00:22:37.759of there? Like, what doyou believe about racism? That was my32600:22:38.079 --> 00:22:41.119actually my next question. What doyou think about racism. It's horrible.32700:22:41.160 --> 00:22:44.960Well, what if they held KuKlux Klan meetings inside of there? Would32800:22:44.960 --> 00:22:48.279you still go in, even ifthey offered other services? Of course not,32900:22:48.279 --> 00:22:51.559because you don't want to be associatedwith racism. Do you want to33000:22:51.559 --> 00:22:55.720be associated with murder, with themurder of children? Yeah, and so33100:22:55.880 --> 00:22:59.559just dropping some truth bombs, whethershe was lying or not, and actually,33200:22:59.599 --> 00:23:02.920in that scenario, fairly confident shewas lying. It was an abortion33300:23:03.000 --> 00:23:07.839day. She fit the kind ofthe just the facial expressions and the way33400:23:07.880 --> 00:23:12.720she was dressed. Pretty sure shewas there for a surgical abortion. But33500:23:12.799 --> 00:23:17.480either way, I'll drop some truthto her right. She had to reckon33600:23:17.519 --> 00:23:21.799with the truth. Yes, shewas. She said herself that abortion was33700:23:21.880 --> 00:23:26.279killing innocent person and she's associating herselfwith the place that does that exactly.33800:23:26.319 --> 00:23:30.119And I'm so glad you brought thatup, because there are going to be33900:23:30.240 --> 00:23:34.079people that aren't lying. Yeah,that are walking in truly to get something34000:23:34.079 --> 00:23:38.839else, PEPs man, whatever,and do do you do they really want34100:23:38.880 --> 00:23:42.079to give their money to a facilitythat profits off of the death of babies?34200:23:42.119 --> 00:23:45.559That's often what I will say.I like the way that that you34300:23:45.640 --> 00:23:49.240led up to that, but ifthey are there for an abortion, it34400:23:49.240 --> 00:23:55.000gives you the opportunity for them totalk about why abortion is wrong instead of34500:23:55.079 --> 00:23:57.920you telling them. They have now, through your series of questions, told34600:23:59.119 --> 00:24:03.039you and for sure they're going togo in there and think about that discussion.34700:24:03.119 --> 00:24:08.119Yeah, so one of the pointsthat I think is really important to34800:24:08.119 --> 00:24:11.720remember is oftentimes all we're doing isplanting to see. Yeah, we just34900:24:11.839 --> 00:24:18.599have to keep that in our heartbecause we may not see an immediate result.35000:24:18.759 --> 00:24:22.799Yeah, of those questions. Theymay still go in and abort,35100:24:22.839 --> 00:24:26.759but maybe the next baby will besaved or maybe they will change their lifestyle35200:24:26.839 --> 00:24:30.920or maybe they will pursue knowing moreabout this God that this person. Yeah,35300:24:32.119 --> 00:24:36.039was was talking about. Yeah,one principle I want to point out,35400:24:36.359 --> 00:24:40.759and you covered a little bit inthis article, is the brochure.35500:24:40.759 --> 00:24:45.160Getting the brochure into their hands cancut through any lies, like they're not35600:24:45.200 --> 00:24:48.000having a conversation with you. Andyou know, why do we lie?35700:24:48.000 --> 00:24:49.799A lot of times, like Italked about earlier, we lie to protect35800:24:49.839 --> 00:24:56.920ourselves, to save face, toyou know, kind of guard against encroachment35900:24:56.160 --> 00:24:59.960of other people and judgment and allof the stuff. Like why would a36000:25:00.000 --> 00:25:03.559woman coming to the abortion center.This is this is a question that I36100:25:03.640 --> 00:25:07.599have. Actually, if she's comingto the abortion center and she's going to36200:25:07.599 --> 00:25:11.440take the life of her baby andshe's gonna lie about that, why did36300:25:11.480 --> 00:25:14.319she even stop and talk? Youknow what I'm saying? Yeah, like,36400:25:14.359 --> 00:25:17.880if she's gonna lie about why she'sthere, why does? Why does36500:25:17.920 --> 00:25:21.559it? She just because many do, but why does Song Stranger? Yes,36600:25:21.640 --> 00:25:23.359that that's even what you know.I can see line. To your36700:25:23.400 --> 00:25:27.319family members maybe, but to atotal stranger we shall never see again.36800:25:27.680 --> 00:25:32.319Why? I? Yeah, why? Why even take the time to stop?36900:25:32.400 --> 00:25:34.920Right? I've had people stop inthe driveway and make up a pretty37000:25:34.960 --> 00:25:40.480extravagant lie and I ask myself,why don't they just keep driving in Anorem37100:25:40.519 --> 00:25:42.720me. It's because of guilt,that's why. Yeah, yeah, and37200:25:42.799 --> 00:25:47.400because they want to say face andbecause they want to appear. The Bible37300:25:47.440 --> 00:25:49.519says each one, each man,will claim his own goodness. We want37400:25:49.559 --> 00:25:53.160to proclaim our goodness. Want tomake sure that people know we're actually doing37500:25:53.200 --> 00:25:56.599the right thing, unlike everybody else. And reality it's a fig leaf.37600:25:56.720 --> 00:26:03.000Yeah, but kind of going backto the brochure, the brochure kind of37700:26:03.039 --> 00:26:06.200handles all of that, because it'sreally a conversation. Was the reading that37800:26:06.200 --> 00:26:08.279brochure, their scripture in there.The Gospel is laid out in there,37900:26:08.319 --> 00:26:12.119the fetal development of three talking pointsare laid out in there. They get38000:26:12.200 --> 00:26:15.680that literature and they got to dealwith what they're reading on that between them38100:26:15.680 --> 00:26:19.079and the Lord, Right. It'snot about trying to guard themselves and protect38200:26:19.119 --> 00:26:23.359themselves against my judgment or whatever.It's like. They're reading it and they38300:26:23.400 --> 00:26:27.759they can apply it. So wedefinitely need to speak and we need to38400:26:27.799 --> 00:26:32.599engage in conversation as much as wecan. But that brochure, that needs38500:26:32.640 --> 00:26:34.640to be the first thing we getinto their hands. So, whether they're38600:26:34.720 --> 00:26:38.000lying to us or not, justlet that thing speak and you can save38700:26:38.119 --> 00:26:41.200this is for your friend. Thenyeah, you don't have to expose the38800:26:41.240 --> 00:26:45.519lie in one of the reasons,by the way, that that when it's38900:26:45.599 --> 00:26:49.799not wise to directly, at leastexpose and confront expose the lie in a39000:26:49.839 --> 00:26:55.720confrontational way. Yeah, we areplanning seats. Sometimes those seeds sprout while39100:26:55.880 --> 00:27:00.799they are in that abortion center andyou don't want to have slam the door39200:27:00.920 --> 00:27:07.279on the relationship by being so confrontationalor calling them names, like calling them39300:27:07.279 --> 00:27:11.599a liar. Yeah, that theywon't come talk with you if they change39400:27:11.640 --> 00:27:15.559their mind. Yeah, and thatdoes happen. They will get in there,39500:27:15.880 --> 00:27:21.200that everything you've said has finally kindof hit home and God has convicted39600:27:21.240 --> 00:27:25.720their heart and they come out andthey are willing then to find out how39700:27:25.720 --> 00:27:32.400we can help. Yeah, andoftentimes the lies are partialized, right.39800:27:32.519 --> 00:27:36.720Like one of the partial eyes thatI'm remembering recently was a woman who said39900:27:36.759 --> 00:27:41.039she was there for a high riskpregnancy and so she had to abort the40000:27:41.039 --> 00:27:45.680baby and it was a high riskpregnancy, but by the time she finally40100:27:45.720 --> 00:27:49.119came out and talked to me moreand and had chosen life, it turns40200:27:49.160 --> 00:27:55.119out it wasn't really the high riskpregnancy that was the true issue. There40300:27:55.119 --> 00:28:00.640were other things. So the keepingthe door of communication open is one of40400:28:00.680 --> 00:28:03.799the major reasons be careful and directlyconfronting, right, that we know that40500:28:03.839 --> 00:28:08.240they're Lyne because we they may changetheir mind and we do want them to40600:28:08.319 --> 00:28:11.559come back and speak with us.Yeah, yeah, no doubt. And40700:28:11.759 --> 00:28:17.079in all this, just as witheverything, we need to be walking with40800:28:17.119 --> 00:28:19.599the Lord. Yeah, in Godcan expose those laws. It can be40900:28:21.039 --> 00:28:23.519you can you can expose the lawsall you want, you can point out41000:28:23.559 --> 00:28:26.759the inconsistencies and what they're saying allyou want, but if the conviction of41100:28:26.759 --> 00:28:30.599the Holy Spirit is not there,they're just going to go in. They're41200:28:30.599 --> 00:28:33.920going to be mad at you forjudging them or whatever. We need the41300:28:33.920 --> 00:28:37.839conviction of the Holy Spirit. Weneed to have the Holy Spirit in the41400:28:37.880 --> 00:28:42.960conversation, directing the conversation and whenthere are times where it's appropriate to point41500:28:44.000 --> 00:28:47.200out, hey, you just saidthis and now you're telling me this,41600:28:47.240 --> 00:28:49.599like that doesn't line up. Yeah, you can do that graciously in the41700:28:49.599 --> 00:28:53.039Holy Spirit can guide that conversation andbring conviction, because it's not going to41800:28:53.079 --> 00:28:56.200be you, it's not going tobe your tone of voice or whatever that's41900:28:56.240 --> 00:28:59.519going to bring conviction. It's goingto be the Holy Spirit. And there42000:28:59.559 --> 00:29:04.000are there are appropriate times to pointout in consistencies. Yeah, but still42100:29:04.000 --> 00:29:07.799do that with asking questions. Soyou just told me this and now you're42200:29:07.799 --> 00:29:12.440saying this. Can you help meunderstand how those two things fit together?42300:29:12.640 --> 00:29:17.079Yeah, that's a really good wayto ask right, and sometimes there is42400:29:17.119 --> 00:29:18.720a way that they fit together.And, like you said, they're partial42500:29:18.759 --> 00:29:23.400lie. There untrues that are twistedand again, these are mechanisms are trying42600:29:23.440 --> 00:29:30.720to protect themselves against right, yourjudgment, against embarrassment or whatever. And42700:29:30.799 --> 00:29:34.480so yeah, just asking the HolySpirit to help you navigate through these conversations42800:29:34.519 --> 00:29:38.160is very important and that's why Ithink it's really important, as we're on42900:29:38.200 --> 00:29:41.640our way to the abortion center,to be in prayer, to ask the43000:29:41.680 --> 00:29:45.880Lord to give us his wisdom whenwe're there with our team on the sidewalk,43100:29:45.920 --> 00:29:49.240to start with prayer, dedicate themorning to the Lord and ask his43200:29:49.279 --> 00:29:53.400wisdom, ask him to come intothe the situations that you're facing on a43300:29:53.480 --> 00:29:57.799daytoday basis. And I want tosay take that seriously, that advice seriously43400:29:57.839 --> 00:30:04.279everyone, because I do when Iremember you saying one Daniel, as you're43500:30:04.359 --> 00:30:07.519driving into the abortion center, isreally not the time to be listening to43600:30:07.519 --> 00:30:14.079the news right the radio. Well, I often used to, because it's43700:30:14.119 --> 00:30:17.079really the only time I ever hearthe news. I don't don't let I43800:30:17.119 --> 00:30:22.279don't even have a television to hearor stations that broadcast news or anything.43900:30:22.440 --> 00:30:26.559So but I stopped doing it afterhearing that and I thought I'm really going44000:30:26.599 --> 00:30:30.119to devote this drive, which isa half hour drive for me to prayer.44100:30:30.400 --> 00:30:34.559Yeah, specifically for these women comingand and I think it really changed44200:30:34.599 --> 00:30:38.920my effectiveness out on the sidebox.So I really think that is really good44300:30:38.960 --> 00:30:45.599advice. Devote the morning prior tocoming to the abortion center to to being44400:30:45.640 --> 00:30:51.200in prayer, being in the wordand and asking God and the Holy Spirit44500:30:51.240 --> 00:30:53.799to be helping you. Yeah,Amen, that's good. Well, guys,44600:30:53.799 --> 00:30:56.720we hope that this podcast episode wasa blessing to you. Guys,44700:30:56.799 --> 00:31:00.279if you want to reach out tome, you can reach me Daniel at44800:31:00.279 --> 00:31:03.160love life don't Org. You canreach her Vicky at love life don't Org.44900:31:03.240 --> 00:31:07.920We'd love to hear from you suggestionsfor future podcast maybe clarification that you45000:31:07.960 --> 00:31:12.319need on previous episodes that we've done. We do these things to encourage you.45100:31:12.359 --> 00:31:15.680We put these episodes out to challengeyou and equip you, and so45200:31:15.720 --> 00:31:19.839we hope that they do that foryou. Let us know if, if,45300:31:19.880 --> 00:31:23.279again, there's other things that wecan cover, but until next time,45400:31:23.480 --> 00:31:32.519God bless yet bless you all.You give me out left for love.45500:31:36.240 --> 00:31:45.000Give me our life for gratitude.I know it will cost me my45600:31:45.039 --> 00:31:52.960life. Nothing's too precious. SinceI met you,