Jan. 28, 2021

Hard Cases: Helping a Coerced Teen

Hard Cases: Helping a Coerced Teen

This is an amazing story. Marissa showed up at the abortion center laughing and joking but as the Lord moved on her heart she knew she couldn't abort. Family and friends were pressuring her to go through with the abortion but God had other plans. In...


This is an amazing story. Marissa showed up at the abortion center laughing and joking but as the Lord moved on her heart she knew she couldn't abort. Family and friends were pressuring her to go through with the abortion but God had other plans. In the episode, we share how our team dealt with this situation and some principles we learned along the way.

https://sidewalks4life.com/counseling-a-teen-being-coerced-to-abort/

Transcript
WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.040 --> 00:00:07.230 I Am Yours, I am yours, I am yours, and me, 2 00:00:07.589 --> 00:00:12.230 Lord, I am yours. Welcome to the Gospel Center prayer life podcast. 3 00:00:12.550 --> 00:00:15.269 This episode we're going to share a story of a young lady that was being 4 00:00:15.349 --> 00:00:18.870 coerced to a board and how God used our team to help her choose life. 5 00:00:18.910 --> 00:00:21.820 I'm going to share some principles that will encourage you, so stay tuned. 6 00:00:25.179 --> 00:00:36.969 I felt show passish, touch your heart, use me. Welcome to 7 00:00:37.049 --> 00:00:42.009 the Gospel Center pray life podcast. In this episode we're going to do much 8 00:00:42.009 --> 00:00:45.689 of what we had done in a previous episode and we talked about doing in 9 00:00:46.009 --> 00:00:50.679 some following episodes, which are dealing with hard cases and doing that with case 10 00:00:50.799 --> 00:00:55.759 studies, with actual experiences that we've had at the abortion center, actual women 11 00:00:55.840 --> 00:01:00.960 that we've ministered to, babies that we've seen saved and babies that we've unfortunately 12 00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:03.750 seen lost, and just sharing our experiences to equip you guys. That's the 13 00:01:03.829 --> 00:01:07.670 intention here, is to equip you guys, to help you guys learn from 14 00:01:07.670 --> 00:01:11.870 our mistakes, maybe learn from some of the things we did right. And 15 00:01:11.030 --> 00:01:15.189 in this story that we're going to be sharing, this case study, we'll 16 00:01:15.230 --> 00:01:19.859 be talking about dealing with a teen who was coerced to a board. Right, 17 00:01:19.980 --> 00:01:22.939 and that is a very common situation. It is. So we're going 18 00:01:22.980 --> 00:01:26.579 to talk through, sharing the story kind of how things played out from our 19 00:01:26.780 --> 00:01:30.500 perspective, and then, as in our previous podcast about Kara and that high 20 00:01:30.500 --> 00:01:36.329 risk situation or that hard case, I'm going to share some principles they had 21 00:01:36.329 --> 00:01:40.329 to do with the story. So with that, let's let's jump into it. 22 00:01:40.650 --> 00:01:42.489 This is a great story. Is One of my favorite stories. Yeah, 23 00:01:42.609 --> 00:01:47.840 of my experiences out on out on the sidewalk. So we'll call US 24 00:01:47.879 --> 00:01:49.760 young lady Marissa. Yeah, yeah, and just keeping man gazes. We're 25 00:01:49.760 --> 00:01:53.799 going through these hard cases and we're sharing the name of the mom or anyone 26 00:01:53.840 --> 00:02:00.280 else's name. Names are changed in these stories to protect the identity of the 27 00:02:00.359 --> 00:02:04.950 person involved. That's right. So Marissa's going to be her name in this 28 00:02:05.750 --> 00:02:10.469 particular one. But right. Yeah. So Marissa shows up at the abortion 29 00:02:10.550 --> 00:02:15.659 center, pulls up in a car, laughing with two teenage friends. She's 30 00:02:15.740 --> 00:02:20.780 clearly young. They're all young, you can tell. They're all clearly under 31 00:02:20.939 --> 00:02:23.699 eighteen, probably in the sixteen year range, a boy and a girl, 32 00:02:23.860 --> 00:02:30.090 and then Marissa. They're all laughing and joking. This is all one big 33 00:02:30.289 --> 00:02:35.250 funny thing to them, which is always a little hard for us sidewalk councils 34 00:02:35.409 --> 00:02:38.129 to watch. They rolled down their window for me, though they did stop, 35 00:02:39.050 --> 00:02:45.280 and my impression of courses immediately. They just think this is all a 36 00:02:46.400 --> 00:02:49.199 walk in the park, this is all just a big joke to them. 37 00:02:50.280 --> 00:02:55.159 So the moment that I indicate did that I was there to help for a 38 00:02:55.240 --> 00:03:00.229 choice for life, the young man who was driving, the father of the 39 00:03:00.270 --> 00:03:05.229 baby, is ready to zoom away. Yeah, but Marissa, who at 40 00:03:05.270 --> 00:03:07.629 that point I don't know her name and and I didn't know that she was 41 00:03:07.750 --> 00:03:12.069 the one having the abortion, she's in the back seat and that, while 42 00:03:12.229 --> 00:03:16.259 she's Giggling, she reaches for my literature and and takes it, thanks me 43 00:03:16.379 --> 00:03:21.099 and they're they're all just laughing and, you know, I just want to 44 00:03:21.139 --> 00:03:23.900 shake them. I just want to like say, wake up, this is 45 00:03:23.180 --> 00:03:29.169 serious. What you're in here to do is so serious. And but but 46 00:03:29.330 --> 00:03:32.530 instead of doing that, I kindly and listed all of the ways that we 47 00:03:32.610 --> 00:03:37.449 could help them, urge them to go on the mobile ultrasound unit which is 48 00:03:38.090 --> 00:03:40.560 parked on the curb, so that that they would be able to go and 49 00:03:40.680 --> 00:03:45.000 see their baby. Yeah, that's kind of the scene, as I see 50 00:03:45.039 --> 00:03:47.560 it, as they arrive. And this first principle that we want to touch 51 00:03:47.639 --> 00:03:51.240 on, and as you're listening through this podcast, maybe you're driving down the 52 00:03:51.240 --> 00:03:53.919 road, or whether you can't do this, but as you're listening through, 53 00:03:53.960 --> 00:03:57.270 maybe you're at home and you're able to take notes right down some of these 54 00:03:57.270 --> 00:04:00.629 principles, because these are principles that we learned in the midst of these situations, 55 00:04:00.750 --> 00:04:04.310 that we keep in memory and that we employ in the the following stories 56 00:04:04.310 --> 00:04:08.590 that we encounter and all of that. Like, you learn from these situations 57 00:04:08.710 --> 00:04:11.580 and the principles that are drawn out of these situations. And if you don't 58 00:04:11.580 --> 00:04:14.219 have a pen and you are driving down the road, we will post this, 59 00:04:14.300 --> 00:04:17.379 this article, along with the pocket the link to the PODCAST, and 60 00:04:17.459 --> 00:04:23.060 we also post it at sidewalks for life dot. Yeah. Absolutely. So 61 00:04:23.180 --> 00:04:28.449 the first, first principle is don't let first impressions deter you from offering truth 62 00:04:28.490 --> 00:04:31.730 and help these that's folks showed up and they were laughing and they were giggling 63 00:04:31.810 --> 00:04:34.129 and you can have a tendency, I know I would have a tendency just 64 00:04:34.209 --> 00:04:38.569 to write them off, saying they'd be like throwing pearls to Swane if I 65 00:04:38.600 --> 00:04:42.839 gave them literature. Yep, but that's not always the case. Sometimes people 66 00:04:42.920 --> 00:04:47.519 use laughter and Giggling and acting Goofy as a mechanism to cast off some of 67 00:04:47.560 --> 00:04:51.279 the guilt that they're feeling, some of the weight of conviction that they're feeling. 68 00:04:51.279 --> 00:04:56.029 If you think about it in your life, I know from me I'll 69 00:04:56.110 --> 00:04:59.310 do that. You know, people make me angry. Sometimes I'll just laugh 70 00:04:59.350 --> 00:05:01.790 at all. I'll be laughing and really inside I'm angry. You know that 71 00:05:01.910 --> 00:05:04.550 can be the case with these MOMS. So don't let these first impressions, 72 00:05:04.589 --> 00:05:09.300 how they come across initially, deter you from doing what you're there to do 73 00:05:09.379 --> 00:05:12.699 to all for help and hope and the truth of the Gospel. Yeah, 74 00:05:12.699 --> 00:05:15.060 really, no matter what we face, our response should always be the same. 75 00:05:15.100 --> 00:05:20.930 Are we glorifying God? Are We offering gospel centered help and tangible help? 76 00:05:21.410 --> 00:05:27.050 And we should do that in a way that is pleasing to God. 77 00:05:27.370 --> 00:05:30.370 Yeah, and making fun of them, shaking them even though you feel like 78 00:05:30.529 --> 00:05:34.689 it, or were being angry, or just ignoring them completely are would not 79 00:05:35.120 --> 00:05:42.040 honor or promote the purposes of our prolife ministry. So, yeah, so, 80 00:05:42.160 --> 00:05:46.279 anyway. So they park in the abortion center lot and Myressa and her 81 00:05:46.360 --> 00:05:50.670 friend went into the abortion center. We're continuing to call out, as we 82 00:05:50.750 --> 00:05:55.110 always do, offers of help, truth about God. Meanwhile, the the 83 00:05:55.230 --> 00:05:58.589 young man, parks in his car. I believe what he did was he 84 00:05:58.670 --> 00:06:00.509 went around the corner of the parking lot so he can't see us, he 85 00:06:00.670 --> 00:06:03.819 hoped he's trying not to hear us. He wants nothing to do with us 86 00:06:04.139 --> 00:06:09.779 and he stayed in the car. And then a few minutes later Marissa and 87 00:06:09.899 --> 00:06:14.699 her friend come out of the abortion center and they're still laughing and joking, 88 00:06:15.980 --> 00:06:19.889 but at which at that point they start walking towards me and I'm wondering if 89 00:06:19.930 --> 00:06:24.290 their plants or, you know, what do you call it? A MOLD? 90 00:06:24.410 --> 00:06:27.370 Yeah, coming in from the pro abortions that we're trying to get in 91 00:06:27.529 --> 00:06:31.089 and figure out what our operation is over, because they were just so not 92 00:06:31.529 --> 00:06:38.079 serious. But they're they're coming, coming towards me and they she said that 93 00:06:38.439 --> 00:06:42.680 she wanted to go on the RV to see her baby. So they they 94 00:06:42.759 --> 00:06:46.560 do. They come aboard the RV. Yeah, and the second principle in 95 00:06:46.680 --> 00:06:49.230 this is kind of like the first principle. Don't let the first impressions to 96 00:06:49.350 --> 00:06:55.550 turn you, even if they are pro abortion mold to come and infiltrate the 97 00:06:55.790 --> 00:07:00.029 operation on the mobiles or Sound Unit. Still nothing changes. Like we don't 98 00:07:00.029 --> 00:07:04.100 need to change right. So treat everyone is their abortion vulnerable, and that's 99 00:07:04.100 --> 00:07:09.899 so important, because they we they they will lie all I mean, I 100 00:07:09.980 --> 00:07:12.939 don't not all the time, but they they do. The people coming to 101 00:07:13.019 --> 00:07:15.009 an a portion center assumed guilt. So they will lie. And if you 102 00:07:15.170 --> 00:07:19.730 buy the lies and you don't treat them as so they're abortion vulnerable, you 103 00:07:19.850 --> 00:07:24.769 may lose the opportunity to plant seeds that later on are going to bear fruit. 104 00:07:24.850 --> 00:07:28.089 Yeah, and you think about it. kind of your concern was like, 105 00:07:28.209 --> 00:07:30.079 okay, so they're coming out of the abortion center of their laugh and 106 00:07:30.639 --> 00:07:35.040 they're I mean, from all appearances, they don't really want the help this 107 00:07:35.160 --> 00:07:39.439 available, available on the mobile unit where they coming on there as like why 108 00:07:39.480 --> 00:07:43.040 are they coming? And let's say they were. I mean we've suspected this 109 00:07:43.160 --> 00:07:46.430 with a few women that have come on the mobiltra sound unit that have offered 110 00:07:46.589 --> 00:07:49.230 or that we've offered help to, is that they might be pro abortion moles 111 00:07:49.350 --> 00:07:54.470 trying to figure out the operation and how they can I don't know, use 112 00:07:54.550 --> 00:07:59.019 our words to quote, expose us or whatever. Yeah, but the more 113 00:07:59.060 --> 00:08:01.779 I've like thought about that concern and the more we've talked about that concern, 114 00:08:01.860 --> 00:08:07.100 it's like, well, with they really even be able to expose anything? 115 00:08:07.100 --> 00:08:09.939 I mean the discover were really nice people who are offering a lot of real 116 00:08:11.060 --> 00:08:15.290 health. Yeah, they'll discover that the stuff that we're actually offering we actually 117 00:08:15.329 --> 00:08:20.129 carry through with, and so may it. Let it be a moment. 118 00:08:20.250 --> 00:08:24.129 So maybe this is kind of like a subprinciple. Yeah, is don't worry 119 00:08:24.170 --> 00:08:28.240 about infiltration from pro abortion people as long as you're consistent and you got nothing 120 00:08:28.279 --> 00:08:31.519 to hide, like you know. I mean I'm thinking even like it's kind 121 00:08:31.519 --> 00:08:35.360 of a personal scenario of to my if the FBI busted up in my house 122 00:08:35.399 --> 00:08:39.200 and started did like a thorough search of my house, right, I mean 123 00:08:39.240 --> 00:08:43.629 they'd be probably they probably fall asleep because it'd be so bored at what they 124 00:08:43.669 --> 00:08:46.389 found. Like they wouldn't find anything. You know I'm saying. So it's 125 00:08:46.389 --> 00:08:50.269 like if you're not guilty, you have nothing to worry about. Exactly. 126 00:08:50.389 --> 00:08:52.710 So, if we're not lying to these women, we're not manipulating and we're 127 00:08:52.710 --> 00:08:58.019 not offering things that we don't actually carry through with. Right then we would 128 00:08:58.019 --> 00:09:01.059 have a concern, but since we are consistent Christians, there's no concern there. 129 00:09:01.100 --> 00:09:05.139 Anyway, the principle is treat everyone as though there of abortion vulnerable when 130 00:09:05.139 --> 00:09:09.009 you encounter them at the abortion center and just carry on with the ministry that 131 00:09:09.049 --> 00:09:11.850 God has called you to right, right, a little sort of side story, 132 00:09:11.889 --> 00:09:16.570 but it was funny happened today where one of the pro abortion people was 133 00:09:16.009 --> 00:09:20.570 videotaping. She was like tipping open our blessing bag that we have on the 134 00:09:20.610 --> 00:09:26.120 sidewalk, videotaping the contents, and we're like why, why are you doing 135 00:09:26.200 --> 00:09:28.759 this? You're going to discover that we actually give sort of Nice things. 136 00:09:28.840 --> 00:09:33.080 Yeah, and in the blessing bags out anyway. Yeah, don't don't worry 137 00:09:33.080 --> 00:09:37.320 about that. Basically, just do your job, do it what God has 138 00:09:37.399 --> 00:09:41.309 called you to do. So so she's comes on the RV and I did 139 00:09:41.389 --> 00:09:45.789 what I always do, still wondering she might be a mole. She certainly 140 00:09:45.870 --> 00:09:50.269 doesn't seem like she's taking this whole thing very seriously. But but I found 141 00:09:50.269 --> 00:09:54.500 out the situation. I asked a bunch of questions. I found out she 142 00:09:54.620 --> 00:09:58.899 was sixteen years old. She was being urged by her Guardian, who was 143 00:09:58.980 --> 00:10:03.419 her grandmother. Yeah, to have the abortion and her boyfriend and friend were 144 00:10:03.500 --> 00:10:09.450 obviously also counseling abhorred person. But she said she wanted to see the baby 145 00:10:09.610 --> 00:10:13.129 first, and when she said that there was a change like I could tell 146 00:10:13.169 --> 00:10:18.649 that was a sincere statement. She wanted to see this baby first. So 147 00:10:18.690 --> 00:10:22.519 I listed, as we always do. I listed the many resources that we 148 00:10:22.600 --> 00:10:26.919 could provide. I talked about God, asked her if she knew God. 149 00:10:28.480 --> 00:10:31.519 She claims she did, but she was clearly not following God's commands, which 150 00:10:31.519 --> 00:10:35.600 is usually the case. She you know, if they're following God's commands are 151 00:10:35.600 --> 00:10:39.629 not going to be at an abortion center. Yeah, but I asked her 152 00:10:39.669 --> 00:10:43.990 if I could share some truths about God and she immediately said yes, but 153 00:10:45.149 --> 00:10:48.870 the friend didn't want anything to do with that and the friend said I gotta 154 00:10:48.909 --> 00:10:54.820 go and goes tearing off of the RV. She doesn't want to hear truths 155 00:10:54.860 --> 00:11:03.370 about God. But surprisingly Marissa did stay and listened and told us that she 156 00:11:03.690 --> 00:11:09.730 was being forced by her grandmother, but she knew, which is why she 157 00:11:09.850 --> 00:11:13.009 was laughing all the time. She knew, although her friends didn't know. 158 00:11:13.529 --> 00:11:18.440 That because she was sixteen and underage, therefore she would not be able to 159 00:11:18.600 --> 00:11:24.000 get the abortion without her grandmother's written permission, or I think the grandmother would 160 00:11:24.000 --> 00:11:31.279 actually have to be there and sign the legal guardian. And so Marissa knew 161 00:11:31.000 --> 00:11:35.110 that no abortion was going to happen. Yeah, to that day. Her 162 00:11:35.190 --> 00:11:41.710 friends didn't know that, though. I shared the Gospel. Asked Marissa if 163 00:11:41.950 --> 00:11:48.820 if she wanted to follow God and she said she did so, following sharing 164 00:11:48.899 --> 00:11:52.779 the Gospel, she actually wanted to commit her life to Jesus and did so 165 00:11:52.019 --> 00:11:56.700 right right then and there. Yeah, on on the RV, which happens 166 00:11:56.899 --> 00:12:01.970 actually not infrequently. Yeah, especially often times with younger people who have they've 167 00:12:01.009 --> 00:12:05.009 come to the end of the rope. They they they know they're in a 168 00:12:05.090 --> 00:12:07.809 bad place and they know they need they need help. So as at that 169 00:12:09.090 --> 00:12:13.649 point there's a banging on the RV door and the boyfriend is screaming. He's 170 00:12:13.929 --> 00:12:18.519 furious. He now has discovered, oh, she went on the RV. 171 00:12:18.840 --> 00:12:22.960 He figured out she had left the abortion center. So He's screaming at her 172 00:12:24.039 --> 00:12:26.919 come out and do what you see, we came here to do. Come 173 00:12:26.960 --> 00:12:31.629 out and aboard, and we actually locked him out Marissa was shouting leave us 174 00:12:31.669 --> 00:12:37.549 alone. She she said she's not going to abort and she's not coming out. 175 00:12:37.230 --> 00:12:41.750 And at that point I assure Marissa that I will drive her home, 176 00:12:43.110 --> 00:12:48.700 okay, and a fellow counselor who hears me say that. I don't know 177 00:12:48.779 --> 00:12:50.460 if she would. I think the fellow counselor was on the RV at the 178 00:12:50.580 --> 00:12:54.980 time and she said, well, you're not going to go alone. I 179 00:12:54.019 --> 00:12:58.179 think she was shadowing me, so she's watching what I do. Said I'll 180 00:12:58.179 --> 00:13:01.090 go with you. Yeah, I'll drive home from home with you, and 181 00:13:01.409 --> 00:13:05.929 so we bring the the up signed nurse Brings Merca back to see her baby. 182 00:13:07.049 --> 00:13:11.330 This just further solidifies her choice for life. She loved the baby. 183 00:13:11.610 --> 00:13:16.600 Yeah, okay. Well, the next principle in this is exactly what you 184 00:13:16.720 --> 00:13:20.200 did and what's an important thing for you to do, and this requires listening, 185 00:13:20.320 --> 00:13:24.919 but it's develop a relationship and try to understand the dynamics of the reason 186 00:13:26.039 --> 00:13:28.309 why the mother is there at the abortion center. So you have to listen. 187 00:13:28.350 --> 00:13:31.509 Yeah, and that's the thing that many of these women are not used 188 00:13:31.549 --> 00:13:37.750 to, someone that actually listens and cares. Yeah, you're supposed to be 189 00:13:37.870 --> 00:13:41.269 listening and that helps you build a relationship, and you can build a relationship 190 00:13:41.269 --> 00:13:45.779 with these MOMS and ultimately earn their trust, right, by letting them know 191 00:13:45.940 --> 00:13:50.820 you care. Yeah, and, of course, hearing at what the the 192 00:13:50.139 --> 00:13:54.179 things that are actually going on in her life, the stuff she struggled with, 193 00:13:54.340 --> 00:13:56.889 the pressure, the coercion that's coming from the people that she trusts, 194 00:13:58.330 --> 00:14:01.850 her guardian, her grandmother, the boyfriend who she's obviously at least in some 195 00:14:01.970 --> 00:14:07.570 way, intimately involved, right. Yeah, those people have really betrayed her 196 00:14:07.610 --> 00:14:09.519 trust. You want to try to earn her trust? Yeah, by building 197 00:14:09.559 --> 00:14:15.240 that relationship and, of course, in this situation, one of the touch 198 00:14:15.320 --> 00:14:18.200 points, one of the basis is of that relationship is really the Gospel. 199 00:14:18.399 --> 00:14:22.639 It was sharing the Gospel. It was she knew that was something that she 200 00:14:22.759 --> 00:14:26.429 needed. It often is. Even when they say I don't want to hear 201 00:14:26.470 --> 00:14:30.549 about God, oftentimes they will come back circle, back to God. If 202 00:14:30.950 --> 00:14:35.389 if you pray to God to open that door. But in terms of trust 203 00:14:35.669 --> 00:14:39.460 and the betrayal, you wouldn't believe what happens next. I mean really, 204 00:14:41.860 --> 00:14:46.340 the betrayal of the people who were supposed to protect her was so devastating, 205 00:14:48.139 --> 00:14:54.330 and not only in what had happened that day. So the but after the 206 00:14:54.450 --> 00:14:58.929 ultrasound, I we she did not want to get back in that boyfriend's car. 207 00:15:00.009 --> 00:15:03.649 I didn't. I didn't want her to either. Was I don't know 208 00:15:03.769 --> 00:15:09.600 if that was wise or not. We've got this angry boyfriend who's literally banging 209 00:15:09.720 --> 00:15:13.320 on the sting, on the door exactly. So obviously a bit. It's 210 00:15:13.320 --> 00:15:18.279 got an angry issue and possibly violent. But I was not going to send 211 00:15:18.320 --> 00:15:22.230 her home with with this angry boyfriend in the car, the angry boyfriend. 212 00:15:22.950 --> 00:15:28.750 So I hurried her to my car with my fellow counselor, and the boyfriend 213 00:15:28.909 --> 00:15:31.230 spotted us and he got he was coming around the corner. So he's out 214 00:15:31.230 --> 00:15:35.980 of his car. So as we jump in my car, he's running to 215 00:15:35.139 --> 00:15:41.340 his car, Aligne I know now, and chases on and and so I 216 00:15:41.899 --> 00:15:46.899 I take off as fast as I can and just turned a lot of corners, 217 00:15:46.980 --> 00:15:50.929 quick corners, into to lose him. And then we waited and we 218 00:15:50.009 --> 00:15:54.490 knew that that we had indeed law most him. We saw him go by. 219 00:15:54.529 --> 00:15:56.929 Actually, yeah, so we did. And he's going a thousand miles 220 00:15:56.970 --> 00:16:03.490 an hour and didn't see us. So I had Marissa take me to her 221 00:16:03.649 --> 00:16:07.120 home by circuitous roots, so in case he caught up with us, that 222 00:16:07.679 --> 00:16:15.200 he would he would never find us. And it did occur to me as 223 00:16:15.320 --> 00:16:19.509 I'm driving, I hope I'm not doing something stupid, Uh Huh, and 224 00:16:19.990 --> 00:16:25.750 as it turns out, I probably was. But but it got more stupidest 225 00:16:26.789 --> 00:16:32.149 as the story progresses. But all that it is in my head is this 226 00:16:32.350 --> 00:16:37.460 is a desperate teen who needs our help. Yeah, and I am determined 227 00:16:37.500 --> 00:16:41.259 to help her. Yeah, I mean she obviously didn't want to abort. 228 00:16:41.740 --> 00:16:45.220 She was obviously being coerced, which is illegal. Which is illegal? Yeah, 229 00:16:45.500 --> 00:16:49.769 yeah, and so you're helping her to to protect that baby and to 230 00:16:49.889 --> 00:16:52.529 do the thing that she wants to do, which that's R that baby. 231 00:16:52.649 --> 00:16:57.210 That's right. So we reach her home and as we pull in, it's 232 00:16:57.250 --> 00:17:03.960 kind of a really sketchy apartment, probably a kind of a project, and 233 00:17:03.279 --> 00:17:10.599 there is a whole line up of angry looking young men and the grandmother with 234 00:17:10.720 --> 00:17:17.230 their arms cross as her pulling into the driveway and and Marissa and they're kind 235 00:17:17.230 --> 00:17:22.150 of blocking my car and then they start to walk towards my car and Marissa 236 00:17:22.269 --> 00:17:26.869 said, I can't, I can't, I cannot kill this baby, and 237 00:17:26.069 --> 00:17:30.819 I can't get out of the car and I and so I just slam the 238 00:17:30.940 --> 00:17:37.220 car into reverse and we take off. They came storming, running, running 239 00:17:37.259 --> 00:17:40.900 after us. But you know, of course I'm in a car. So 240 00:17:41.980 --> 00:17:49.130 I take off and I am driving down the interstate now having no idea what 241 00:17:49.450 --> 00:17:55.089 to do, and I had the counselor with me start to make some calls 242 00:17:55.650 --> 00:17:57.680 to look for a safe house. You know, just call, call our 243 00:17:57.759 --> 00:18:04.160 network, find a safe place where I can bring this poor young teen. 244 00:18:04.599 --> 00:18:10.839 And, as God would have it, God is amazing. God always has 245 00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:18.509 his plan worked out. There was a family that had been praying specifically that 246 00:18:18.950 --> 00:18:25.549 an abortion minded teen would be brought to their home for safety, and one 247 00:18:25.630 --> 00:18:29.819 of the people that we called told us about this family. Yeah, and 248 00:18:30.700 --> 00:18:34.339 so that's our plan. We, the counselors sitting next to me, is 249 00:18:34.380 --> 00:18:38.980 making the calls and making the arrangements and we're going to bring Marissa to this 250 00:18:40.180 --> 00:18:44.089 family. Then I got a call on the telephone, on my phone, 251 00:18:44.130 --> 00:18:48.089 and I answer it. It's the police and they said, is this Vicky 252 00:18:48.210 --> 00:18:53.250 Soandso? Yes, that's that's me. Are you harboring a teen? They 253 00:18:53.329 --> 00:18:59.920 asked me, and I said, well, that's not what I was thinking 254 00:19:00.039 --> 00:19:03.640 I was doing. But I do have a young woman in the car with 255 00:19:03.839 --> 00:19:08.640 me who is being coursed by her grandmother to abort and she does not want 256 00:19:08.680 --> 00:19:15.750 an abortion. We do have a safe house and that's where I was going 257 00:19:15.829 --> 00:19:19.549 to bring her, and the police suggested that instead I bring the team to 258 00:19:19.670 --> 00:19:25.180 the police station and they would they would take care of it. So, 259 00:19:25.500 --> 00:19:30.460 once we get there, they take both me and my counselor friends driver's license 260 00:19:30.500 --> 00:19:36.140 and tells us that we would probably not be charged with kidnapping a minor, 261 00:19:36.259 --> 00:19:40.250 which entailed jail time. Yeah, you were, you were. We were 262 00:19:40.289 --> 00:19:42.730 sweating it out there a bit. What I want to know before we share 263 00:19:42.769 --> 00:19:45.529 the principle that has to go with this. How in the world that they 264 00:19:45.569 --> 00:19:51.690 get your phone number, because that's a mystery. Well, I had given 265 00:19:51.769 --> 00:19:56.880 the information, I'd given the pamphlet. That's a very good question and it 266 00:19:56.079 --> 00:20:02.000 never even occurred to me. I had g given the pamphlet to the girl 267 00:20:02.119 --> 00:20:04.960 in the back seat. She left it there when she went into the abortion 268 00:20:06.160 --> 00:20:10.390 center. Okay, so and on that pamphlet is my name and phone. 269 00:20:10.509 --> 00:20:14.789 Okay, so that's how they figured out. Yeah, okay. Well, 270 00:20:15.230 --> 00:20:18.630 the principle that goes along with this part of the story. This is important 271 00:20:18.670 --> 00:20:22.500 one, guys, is have a clear understanding of the law, because if 272 00:20:22.539 --> 00:20:26.779 you don't have a clear understanding of the law, and even now it's still 273 00:20:26.980 --> 00:20:32.140 some of the guess understanding and nuances of the law as it concerns harboring a 274 00:20:32.299 --> 00:20:36.289 team are still not clear. But at least having a clear understanding of what 275 00:20:36.329 --> 00:20:38.609 you're doing, what you're getting yourself into. I think this is this is 276 00:20:38.730 --> 00:20:42.769 probably a principle that we should have known at this point. This is kind 277 00:20:42.769 --> 00:20:47.170 of one of the mistakes that we have learned from and how to handle these 278 00:20:47.210 --> 00:20:52.240 situations moving forward. Yeah, so that when you're when you are talking to 279 00:20:52.359 --> 00:20:56.160 the police, you can kind of give them an understanding of the perspective that 280 00:20:56.200 --> 00:21:00.000 you're coming from, what you understand the law to be. And then even 281 00:21:00.079 --> 00:21:03.470 with the teen and considering giving her ride home and all of that, and 282 00:21:03.589 --> 00:21:07.230 understanding what you're getting yourself into, or potentially getting yourself into. Now, 283 00:21:07.269 --> 00:21:10.869 again, this is a life and death situation. Yeah, and this is 284 00:21:11.109 --> 00:21:15.789 very clearly not coercion on your part. This is coercion on the part of 285 00:21:15.869 --> 00:21:18.230 the grandmother, right, and the fact that you were able to go to 286 00:21:18.269 --> 00:21:21.420 the police station and help kind of, because coercion is illegal. Right. 287 00:21:21.460 --> 00:21:25.660 Yeah, driving a team from point a to point B is not necessarily illegal 288 00:21:25.700 --> 00:21:27.500 if they've asked you to, and all of that right right now. If 289 00:21:27.539 --> 00:21:33.329 you were intentionally keeping them away for their family, took them to your house 290 00:21:33.369 --> 00:21:34.970 and locked them in your house or something like that, that would be a 291 00:21:36.009 --> 00:21:37.450 different story. But that's not what you were doing. All the things that 292 00:21:37.569 --> 00:21:41.569 you were doing, even when you left her house, that was all her 293 00:21:42.250 --> 00:21:48.119 her word, her request, right, yeah, and and so just understanding 294 00:21:48.160 --> 00:21:51.240 the law, having a clear understanding of these things before you get into these 295 00:21:51.279 --> 00:21:55.720 things is very helpful. And you know, just in general, when you've 296 00:21:55.720 --> 00:22:00.710 got a minor in the situation, that does become a fairly complicated situation. 297 00:22:00.910 --> 00:22:03.670 It does, because you know in retrospect, what would I have done? 298 00:22:03.750 --> 00:22:07.910 What could I have done differently? I don't know that I would not have 299 00:22:07.990 --> 00:22:11.710 offered the ride of because I think you start calling police with the young, 300 00:22:11.869 --> 00:22:18.180 scared teen with a dysfunctional family, which clearly it was, they might just 301 00:22:18.339 --> 00:22:22.460 bolt and that might be the last you're going to hear from them. Yeah, 302 00:22:22.740 --> 00:22:27.460 but when I was actually driving, I probably should have just immediately thought 303 00:22:27.819 --> 00:22:32.329 I need to bring her to the police. Yeah, so she didn't want 304 00:22:32.410 --> 00:22:38.089 that, she didn't want to get DSS involved, but ultimately DSS was involved. 305 00:22:38.130 --> 00:22:42.250 So that that is actually what happened. It's the police promised me that 306 00:22:42.369 --> 00:22:47.559 DSS would be called and actually Marissa wanted that more than being returned to the 307 00:22:47.599 --> 00:22:51.559 grandmother. Yeah, because she wanted that baby. She knew that she couldn't 308 00:22:51.559 --> 00:22:53.400 kill the baby and she knew if she goes home to granny, Granny's gonna 309 00:22:55.200 --> 00:22:59.750 and says she killed the baby. So I thought I was leaving Marissa safe 310 00:22:59.750 --> 00:23:03.349 and sound at the police that she was going to call me to get the 311 00:23:03.509 --> 00:23:07.750 help that we could offer the baby, shower whatever. DSS was getting involved 312 00:23:07.869 --> 00:23:11.950 and she would be safe that night. The police assured me she would be 313 00:23:11.990 --> 00:23:15.539 safe that night. Yeah. Well, the next morning I'm on the abortion 314 00:23:15.619 --> 00:23:22.059 center sidewalk again and I get a call again from Marissa and she is sobbing. 315 00:23:22.619 --> 00:23:27.210 The police had returned her to a grandmother the night before. I don't 316 00:23:27.250 --> 00:23:30.930 know why. I don't remember why if they tried to call the SS or 317 00:23:32.009 --> 00:23:34.329 what happened, but she was returned to her grandmother. In the morning her 318 00:23:34.450 --> 00:23:38.849 grandmother woke her up early in the morning. Marissa had diabetes, I believe, 319 00:23:40.009 --> 00:23:42.960 some some terrible disease where she had to have regular medication. Yeah, 320 00:23:44.240 --> 00:23:48.480 her grandmother woke her up, did not give her her medication, takes the 321 00:23:48.559 --> 00:23:52.880 Groggy Marissa throws her in the car, or tells her get in the car. 322 00:23:52.000 --> 00:23:56.190 I'm she said she's taken her to a doctor appointment and convinced her it 323 00:23:56.269 --> 00:24:00.309 was a doctor appointment to see the baby. But as they're driving, Marissa 324 00:24:00.470 --> 00:24:04.990 quickly begins to discern they're on the same route back to the abortion center. 325 00:24:06.109 --> 00:24:08.109 She knows what her grandmother is doing now. The grandmother has figured out she 326 00:24:08.190 --> 00:24:11.779 has to go with Marissa to sign the papers and she's going to make sure 327 00:24:11.859 --> 00:24:18.099 Marissa has has the abortion. So when Marissa realizes this, as the car 328 00:24:18.299 --> 00:24:22.019 slows to a stop at part way on the way to the abortion center, 329 00:24:22.740 --> 00:24:26.809 slowing for a stop light or whatever, while the car still moving, Marissa 330 00:24:26.970 --> 00:24:32.970 jumps out of the car, rolls down an embankment and runs to the near 331 00:24:33.210 --> 00:24:37.049 wrist hiding place, which was a lows department store, and was hiding in 332 00:24:37.210 --> 00:24:41.880 one of the aisles where she called me. Well, so this time I 333 00:24:41.759 --> 00:24:45.799 knew, okay, I'm not going to go rush to the rescue. I 334 00:24:45.960 --> 00:24:49.200 need to call the police. So I told her, you know, this 335 00:24:49.319 --> 00:24:53.789 is abduct abduction and coercion. Clear, clearly drinking the law of the grandmother. 336 00:24:53.869 --> 00:24:57.990 So I said call the police, stay hiding, call the police and 337 00:24:59.190 --> 00:25:02.349 then call me back. Tell the police we have a safe house for you, 338 00:25:02.750 --> 00:25:07.180 and then I want you to call me back. So so the police 339 00:25:07.299 --> 00:25:10.700 pick her up, they bring her to the station, they contact the grandmother 340 00:25:10.940 --> 00:25:15.859 and the grandmother said keep her, I don't honor wow. And the police 341 00:25:17.059 --> 00:25:21.609 then called me instead of calling DSS, which I thought was pretty impressive. 342 00:25:22.089 --> 00:25:26.690 They called called me and said we understand you have a safe house and this 343 00:25:26.890 --> 00:25:32.049 girl is traumatized. She she needs a place. Would you be willing to 344 00:25:32.089 --> 00:25:36.680 come and get her? The grandmother is willing to sign over temporary it wasn't 345 00:25:36.720 --> 00:25:40.480 custody, I can't remember what it was called, but just the temporary rights 346 00:25:40.680 --> 00:25:45.480 to bring her child to the safe house. And so the grandmother was there, 347 00:25:47.039 --> 00:25:52.630 signed Marissa over to me and we with the police. I went with 348 00:25:52.789 --> 00:25:57.150 the police and Marissa to the grandmother's house, where she got the essential things 349 00:25:57.269 --> 00:26:03.630 she would she would need eat and we drive her to the safe house. 350 00:26:03.230 --> 00:26:07.180 And that family actually had agreed to as long as it took, but we 351 00:26:07.299 --> 00:26:11.299 all thought it was going to be just a few weeks because I had already 352 00:26:11.380 --> 00:26:15.819 lined up, or our counselors, as I can't remember who was me specifically, 353 00:26:15.819 --> 00:26:18.650 or the network of people helping me head lined up a maternity home that 354 00:26:18.809 --> 00:26:23.490 takes teams and could keep her till age twenty one, which really solved all 355 00:26:23.569 --> 00:26:30.849 the problems. But but because of her residency there, there it took months 356 00:26:32.049 --> 00:26:34.480 and as safe family had to find she was in a different state than the 357 00:26:36.079 --> 00:26:40.000 family and also in the maternity home. That's correct, and so it complicated 358 00:26:40.079 --> 00:26:42.359 things. The paperwork was taking month. She was literally with that safe family 359 00:26:42.480 --> 00:26:47.000 for months and finally it was just too much. The same family had agreed 360 00:26:47.039 --> 00:26:52.789 to weeks and here it's going on month. So at at that point she 361 00:26:52.910 --> 00:26:57.549 actually was moved into a maternity home in her home state and and that was 362 00:26:57.630 --> 00:27:03.299 where we temporarily lost touch with her. Yeah, and so the principle here 363 00:27:03.539 --> 00:27:08.180 is as best we make plans, and we should make plans and arrange things 364 00:27:08.259 --> 00:27:12.460 and, like we talked about in our last podcast about this utilizing team members 365 00:27:12.500 --> 00:27:17.769 and getting people to make appointments and and set things up, and you did 366 00:27:17.890 --> 00:27:22.970 that. But plans can go awry sometimes. To the principal was take one 367 00:27:23.089 --> 00:27:29.009 logical, God given step with the goal of keeping the baby safe, one 368 00:27:29.130 --> 00:27:32.599 step at a time. May Make plans and yeah, and connect with the 369 00:27:32.640 --> 00:27:37.559 eternity homes and find a safe home house, like you did, but just 370 00:27:37.720 --> 00:27:41.000 be ready, be flexible that sometimes plans don't work out like we hope that 371 00:27:41.039 --> 00:27:47.549 they would. Sometimes the even issues can arise with like the maternity home and 372 00:27:47.549 --> 00:27:52.109 then not being able to transfer her over from state to state. Right, 373 00:27:52.190 --> 00:27:56.789 there's complications. Listen, the enemy is going to get in wherever he can. 374 00:27:56.430 --> 00:28:00.539 Yeah, with the goal of getting that young lady back to the abortion 375 00:28:00.700 --> 00:28:03.500 center, getting her trusting an abortion rather than trusting in the Lord. Right. 376 00:28:03.940 --> 00:28:08.579 So just be flexible, be ready to change plans, be ready to 377 00:28:10.619 --> 00:28:14.569 operate on the fly sometimes, yeah, and in the Lord will give you 378 00:28:14.650 --> 00:28:17.769 grace in those situations. You will in another principle. We talked about this 379 00:28:17.930 --> 00:28:19.930 with our other case study, but I think it bears repeating. It's such 380 00:28:19.930 --> 00:28:25.450 an important one as to use team members. I certainly could not have even 381 00:28:25.450 --> 00:28:30.720 begun to have done what what did transpire all on my own. There there 382 00:28:30.960 --> 00:28:34.279 was a whole network of people behind the scenes working and helping and making calls, 383 00:28:34.440 --> 00:28:37.680 even the council that came with me. That kept me calm. The 384 00:28:37.799 --> 00:28:44.869 whole team was called in to play and was really, really important for for 385 00:28:45.029 --> 00:28:49.430 us to to work together as a team. So Marissa actually didn't totally lose 386 00:28:49.869 --> 00:28:53.349 lose touch. She did stay in touch. She had my name and number. 387 00:28:53.990 --> 00:28:59.099 We knew that she was happy at at that maternity home and she actually 388 00:28:59.500 --> 00:29:03.740 had a beautiful baby who she loved deeply. Love Life. At the time 389 00:29:03.900 --> 00:29:07.460 it wasn't love life yet. So cities for life, I believe, with 390 00:29:07.619 --> 00:29:12.329 the help of truth and mercy ministries, which is a a baby shower ministry, 391 00:29:12.410 --> 00:29:18.809 through Sheryl Chandler, through her a wonderful baby shower for her baby and 392 00:29:18.690 --> 00:29:26.319 the story really became one of redemption. That grandmother. Turns out that she 393 00:29:26.440 --> 00:29:30.400 had dementia, which was worsening and worsening and worsening. I guess they didn't 394 00:29:30.400 --> 00:29:34.640 know it at the time. Yeah, but that was what all that craziness 395 00:29:36.000 --> 00:29:44.150 was in part, was mental illness. And Marissa actually returned to the grandmother's 396 00:29:44.190 --> 00:29:47.990 home and ended up taking care of the grandmother. And so there was a 397 00:29:48.950 --> 00:29:53.420 full kind of circle, yea of redemption that came about in the grandmother was 398 00:29:53.500 --> 00:29:59.140 at the baby shower and she was so in love with that little baby, 399 00:29:59.220 --> 00:30:04.140 the baby that she had so desperately wanted to kill. So it just showed 400 00:30:04.420 --> 00:30:15.410 that the power of God to to redeem anything, including Marissa, really could 401 00:30:15.410 --> 00:30:22.240 have been very rightfully furious with that grandmother, but turned around and showed the 402 00:30:22.319 --> 00:30:25.720 love of God, yeah, and took care of that grandmother. Yeah, 403 00:30:25.960 --> 00:30:29.839 absolutely, and that's listen, guys, you're going to hear this throughout all 404 00:30:29.920 --> 00:30:33.240 of these hardcase stories, all of these case studies, because we're a gospel 405 00:30:33.240 --> 00:30:37.309 centered ministry, unapologetically right, we're there to bring the Gospel and bring help 406 00:30:37.349 --> 00:30:41.869 and hope. Yeah, yeah, but this, this last principle, was 407 00:30:41.950 --> 00:30:45.309 the most important principle to remember in all of these hard cases. Nothing is 408 00:30:45.349 --> 00:30:49.259 impossible with God, right, we have to lean on the Lord. Yeah, 409 00:30:49.740 --> 00:30:56.660 we can make connections and we can come up with plans and schemes and 410 00:30:56.819 --> 00:31:00.259 ideas and try to navigate through things, and God gives us wisdom, God 411 00:31:00.339 --> 00:31:03.930 gives us mental capacity to be a bit of figured some of these problems out 412 00:31:03.930 --> 00:31:08.769 and navigate through some of these things. But ultimately we've got to trust in 413 00:31:08.809 --> 00:31:14.049 the Lord. We've got to stay, as the Bible says and John Chapter 414 00:31:14.210 --> 00:31:18.880 Fifteen, attached to the true vine. Jesus has wisdom that we got right. 415 00:31:18.440 --> 00:31:22.240 He's got the ability to see behind the scenes and to work these situations 416 00:31:22.359 --> 00:31:26.680 through that we don't have. We don't have that ability, but he does. 417 00:31:26.799 --> 00:31:30.400 And so, just for the Lord, I mean this is just prim 418 00:31:30.559 --> 00:31:33.910 evidence that the Lord is fateful, that he's good and that nothing is impossible 419 00:31:33.910 --> 00:31:38.150 with him. Whereas you shared just before, this grandmother wanted that child dead, 420 00:31:38.430 --> 00:31:41.630 so much so that she tricked her granddaughter to get into the car since 421 00:31:41.630 --> 00:31:45.789 she could drive her to the abortion center and further pressure her to have the 422 00:31:45.829 --> 00:31:48.940 abortion that obviously didn't want. And yet God can take that situation and turn 423 00:31:48.980 --> 00:31:52.779 it right side up, so much so that that grandmothers at the baby shower 424 00:31:53.220 --> 00:31:57.220 delighting in her great grandchild. Yeah, that's amazing. It's amazing how God 425 00:31:57.380 --> 00:32:00.819 can do that, but God can. And so, guys, I want 426 00:32:00.819 --> 00:32:06.049 to encourage'all trust in the Lord. We can never get as your prolife 427 00:32:06.170 --> 00:32:09.609 ministers, we can never get into this mentality that we've got it figured out, 428 00:32:09.890 --> 00:32:15.450 that these practical principles, and we shared some practical principles can somehow supersede 429 00:32:15.529 --> 00:32:20.240 the wisdom of God. They cannot. Practical Principles, preparation, training and 430 00:32:20.359 --> 00:32:22.920 all of that stuff that, all that stuff can be great, but if 431 00:32:22.000 --> 00:32:28.599 that stuff excludes God, then that stuff is going to leave you deficient and 432 00:32:28.799 --> 00:32:31.269 stand in a major way, and so we need the Lord. That's why 433 00:32:31.309 --> 00:32:36.549 I always encourage with our local volunteers, with our cybwalk missionaries around the country, 434 00:32:36.549 --> 00:32:39.230 around the world, stay in prayer, stay in the word and stay 435 00:32:39.269 --> 00:32:43.309 in church. These are some of the means that God has given us to 436 00:32:43.349 --> 00:32:46.019 stay in close fellowship with him so that we can stay, as John Fifteen 437 00:32:46.059 --> 00:32:51.059 again says, attached to the true vine, because we need what God has. 438 00:32:51.460 --> 00:32:55.259 Wisdom, grace, ability, all of these things that we need God 439 00:32:55.460 --> 00:32:59.289 has. And so that's our encouragement. Do you guess? Yeah, and 440 00:32:59.369 --> 00:33:01.049 I hope this story was a blessing and encouragement. Do you guys? Hope 441 00:33:01.049 --> 00:33:06.329 you learned from some of our mistakes and I hope you'll continue to learn as 442 00:33:06.369 --> 00:33:08.369 we share some of these case studies with you, guys. Again, if 443 00:33:08.410 --> 00:33:12.529 you, as we've often shared and we always will in these podcasts, share 444 00:33:12.569 --> 00:33:15.480 our contact info. If you have questions about this story or if you have 445 00:33:15.599 --> 00:33:17.960 subjects you'd like for us to cover, you can reach out to me, 446 00:33:19.039 --> 00:33:21.720 Daniel a love life dot org. You can reach out to her, Vicky 447 00:33:21.799 --> 00:33:24.240 at Love Life Dot Org. We'd love to hear from you. Our website 448 00:33:24.279 --> 00:33:30.869 that we post these articles on is www dot sidewalks for lifecom sidewalks. The 449 00:33:30.869 --> 00:33:36.990 number four lifecom. You can look under equipping articles and that's where we share 450 00:33:37.390 --> 00:33:39.950 the articles that kind of are the framework for these podcasts, and you'll see 451 00:33:40.069 --> 00:33:44.259 a bunch of them there. Those are to equip you to be effective on 452 00:33:44.339 --> 00:33:46.700 the sidewalk, and so again, you reach out to us. Please leave 453 00:33:46.740 --> 00:33:52.220 a review on the PODCAST, please share it with other people and until next 454 00:33:52.220 --> 00:34:05.690 time, God bless give me our love for love, give me our love 455 00:34:05.930 --> 00:34:17.360 for gratitude. I know it will cost me my life. Nothing's too precious 456 00:34:17.639 --> 00:34:20.000 in some you