Hard Cases: Helping a Coerced Teen

WEBVTT100:00:02.040 --> 00:00:07.230I Am Yours, I am yours, I am yours, and me,200:00:07.589 --> 00:00:12.230Lord, I am yours. Welcometo the Gospel Center prayer life podcast.300:00:12.550 --> 00:00:15.269This episode we're going to share astory of a young lady that was being400:00:15.349 --> 00:00:18.870coerced to a board and how Godused our team to help her choose life.500:00:18.910 --> 00:00:21.820I'm going to share some principles thatwill encourage you, so stay tuned.600:00:25.179 --> 00:00:36.969I felt show passish, touch yourheart, use me. Welcome to700:00:37.049 --> 00:00:42.009the Gospel Center pray life podcast.In this episode we're going to do much800:00:42.009 --> 00:00:45.689of what we had done in aprevious episode and we talked about doing in900:00:46.009 --> 00:00:50.679some following episodes, which are dealingwith hard cases and doing that with case1000:00:50.799 --> 00:00:55.759studies, with actual experiences that we'vehad at the abortion center, actual women1100:00:55.840 --> 00:01:00.960that we've ministered to, babies thatwe've seen saved and babies that we've unfortunately1200:01:00.000 --> 00:01:03.750seen lost, and just sharing ourexperiences to equip you guys. That's the1300:01:03.829 --> 00:01:07.670intention here, is to equip youguys, to help you guys learn from1400:01:07.670 --> 00:01:11.870our mistakes, maybe learn from someof the things we did right. And1500:01:11.030 --> 00:01:15.189in this story that we're going tobe sharing, this case study, we'll1600:01:15.230 --> 00:01:19.859be talking about dealing with a teenwho was coerced to a board. Right,1700:01:19.980 --> 00:01:22.939and that is a very common situation. It is. So we're going1800:01:22.980 --> 00:01:26.579to talk through, sharing the storykind of how things played out from our1900:01:26.780 --> 00:01:30.500perspective, and then, as inour previous podcast about Kara and that high2000:01:30.500 --> 00:01:36.329risk situation or that hard case,I'm going to share some principles they had2100:01:36.329 --> 00:01:40.329to do with the story. Sowith that, let's let's jump into it.2200:01:40.650 --> 00:01:42.489This is a great story. IsOne of my favorite stories. Yeah,2300:01:42.609 --> 00:01:47.840of my experiences out on out onthe sidewalk. So we'll call US2400:01:47.879 --> 00:01:49.760young lady Marissa. Yeah, yeah, and just keeping man gazes. We're2500:01:49.760 --> 00:01:53.799going through these hard cases and we'resharing the name of the mom or anyone2600:01:53.840 --> 00:02:00.280else's name. Names are changed inthese stories to protect the identity of the2700:02:00.359 --> 00:02:04.950person involved. That's right. SoMarissa's going to be her name in this2800:02:05.750 --> 00:02:10.469particular one. But right. Yeah. So Marissa shows up at the abortion2900:02:10.550 --> 00:02:15.659center, pulls up in a car, laughing with two teenage friends. She's3000:02:15.740 --> 00:02:20.780clearly young. They're all young,you can tell. They're all clearly under3100:02:20.939 --> 00:02:23.699eighteen, probably in the sixteen yearrange, a boy and a girl,3200:02:23.860 --> 00:02:30.090and then Marissa. They're all laughingand joking. This is all one big3300:02:30.289 --> 00:02:35.250funny thing to them, which isalways a little hard for us sidewalk councils3400:02:35.409 --> 00:02:38.129to watch. They rolled down theirwindow for me, though they did stop,3500:02:39.050 --> 00:02:45.280and my impression of courses immediately.They just think this is all a3600:02:46.400 --> 00:02:49.199walk in the park, this isall just a big joke to them.3700:02:50.280 --> 00:02:55.159So the moment that I indicate didthat I was there to help for a3800:02:55.240 --> 00:03:00.229choice for life, the young manwho was driving, the father of the3900:03:00.270 --> 00:03:05.229baby, is ready to zoom away. Yeah, but Marissa, who at4000:03:05.270 --> 00:03:07.629that point I don't know her nameand and I didn't know that she was4100:03:07.750 --> 00:03:12.069the one having the abortion, she'sin the back seat and that, while4200:03:12.229 --> 00:03:16.259she's Giggling, she reaches for myliterature and and takes it, thanks me4300:03:16.379 --> 00:03:21.099and they're they're all just laughing and, you know, I just want to4400:03:21.139 --> 00:03:23.900shake them. I just want tolike say, wake up, this is4500:03:23.180 --> 00:03:29.169serious. What you're in here todo is so serious. And but but4600:03:29.330 --> 00:03:32.530instead of doing that, I kindlyand listed all of the ways that we4700:03:32.610 --> 00:03:37.449could help them, urge them togo on the mobile ultrasound unit which is4800:03:38.090 --> 00:03:40.560parked on the curb, so thatthat they would be able to go and4900:03:40.680 --> 00:03:45.000see their baby. Yeah, that'skind of the scene, as I see5000:03:45.039 --> 00:03:47.560it, as they arrive. Andthis first principle that we want to touch5100:03:47.639 --> 00:03:51.240on, and as you're listening throughthis podcast, maybe you're driving down the5200:03:51.240 --> 00:03:53.919road, or whether you can't dothis, but as you're listening through,5300:03:53.960 --> 00:03:57.270maybe you're at home and you're ableto take notes right down some of these5400:03:57.270 --> 00:04:00.629principles, because these are principles thatwe learned in the midst of these situations,5500:04:00.750 --> 00:04:04.310that we keep in memory and thatwe employ in the the following stories5600:04:04.310 --> 00:04:08.590that we encounter and all of that. Like, you learn from these situations5700:04:08.710 --> 00:04:11.580and the principles that are drawn outof these situations. And if you don't5800:04:11.580 --> 00:04:14.219have a pen and you are drivingdown the road, we will post this,5900:04:14.300 --> 00:04:17.379this article, along with the pocketthe link to the PODCAST, and6000:04:17.459 --> 00:04:23.060we also post it at sidewalks forlife dot. Yeah. Absolutely. So6100:04:23.180 --> 00:04:28.449the first, first principle is don'tlet first impressions deter you from offering truth6200:04:28.490 --> 00:04:31.730and help these that's folks showed upand they were laughing and they were giggling6300:04:31.810 --> 00:04:34.129and you can have a tendency,I know I would have a tendency just6400:04:34.209 --> 00:04:38.569to write them off, saying they'dbe like throwing pearls to Swane if I6500:04:38.600 --> 00:04:42.839gave them literature. Yep, butthat's not always the case. Sometimes people6600:04:42.920 --> 00:04:47.519use laughter and Giggling and acting Goofyas a mechanism to cast off some of6700:04:47.560 --> 00:04:51.279the guilt that they're feeling, someof the weight of conviction that they're feeling.6800:04:51.279 --> 00:04:56.029If you think about it in yourlife, I know from me I'll6900:04:56.110 --> 00:04:59.310do that. You know, peoplemake me angry. Sometimes I'll just laugh7000:04:59.350 --> 00:05:01.790at all. I'll be laughing andreally inside I'm angry. You know that7100:05:01.910 --> 00:05:04.550can be the case with these MOMS. So don't let these first impressions,7200:05:04.589 --> 00:05:09.300how they come across initially, deteryou from doing what you're there to do7300:05:09.379 --> 00:05:12.699to all for help and hope andthe truth of the Gospel. Yeah,7400:05:12.699 --> 00:05:15.060really, no matter what we face, our response should always be the same.7500:05:15.100 --> 00:05:20.930Are we glorifying God? Are Weoffering gospel centered help and tangible help?7600:05:21.410 --> 00:05:27.050And we should do that in away that is pleasing to God.7700:05:27.370 --> 00:05:30.370Yeah, and making fun of them, shaking them even though you feel like7800:05:30.529 --> 00:05:34.689it, or were being angry,or just ignoring them completely are would not7900:05:35.120 --> 00:05:42.040honor or promote the purposes of ourprolife ministry. So, yeah, so,8000:05:42.160 --> 00:05:46.279anyway. So they park in theabortion center lot and Myressa and her8100:05:46.360 --> 00:05:50.670friend went into the abortion center.We're continuing to call out, as we8200:05:50.750 --> 00:05:55.110always do, offers of help,truth about God. Meanwhile, the the8300:05:55.230 --> 00:05:58.589young man, parks in his car. I believe what he did was he8400:05:58.670 --> 00:06:00.509went around the corner of the parkinglot so he can't see us, he8500:06:00.670 --> 00:06:03.819hoped he's trying not to hear us. He wants nothing to do with us8600:06:04.139 --> 00:06:09.779and he stayed in the car.And then a few minutes later Marissa and8700:06:09.899 --> 00:06:14.699her friend come out of the abortioncenter and they're still laughing and joking,8800:06:15.980 --> 00:06:19.889but at which at that point theystart walking towards me and I'm wondering if8900:06:19.930 --> 00:06:24.290their plants or, you know,what do you call it? A MOLD?9000:06:24.410 --> 00:06:27.370Yeah, coming in from the proabortions that we're trying to get in9100:06:27.529 --> 00:06:31.089and figure out what our operation isover, because they were just so not9200:06:31.529 --> 00:06:38.079serious. But they're they're coming,coming towards me and they she said that9300:06:38.439 --> 00:06:42.680she wanted to go on the RVto see her baby. So they they9400:06:42.759 --> 00:06:46.560do. They come aboard the RV. Yeah, and the second principle in9500:06:46.680 --> 00:06:49.230this is kind of like the firstprinciple. Don't let the first impressions to9600:06:49.350 --> 00:06:55.550turn you, even if they arepro abortion mold to come and infiltrate the9700:06:55.790 --> 00:07:00.029operation on the mobiles or Sound Unit. Still nothing changes. Like we don't9800:07:00.029 --> 00:07:04.100need to change right. So treateveryone is their abortion vulnerable, and that's9900:07:04.100 --> 00:07:09.899so important, because they we theythey will lie all I mean, I10000:07:09.980 --> 00:07:12.939don't not all the time, butthey they do. The people coming to10100:07:13.019 --> 00:07:15.009an a portion center assumed guilt.So they will lie. And if you10200:07:15.170 --> 00:07:19.730buy the lies and you don't treatthem as so they're abortion vulnerable, you10300:07:19.850 --> 00:07:24.769may lose the opportunity to plant seedsthat later on are going to bear fruit.10400:07:24.850 --> 00:07:28.089Yeah, and you think about it. kind of your concern was like,10500:07:28.209 --> 00:07:30.079okay, so they're coming out ofthe abortion center of their laugh and10600:07:30.639 --> 00:07:35.040they're I mean, from all appearances, they don't really want the help this10700:07:35.160 --> 00:07:39.439available, available on the mobile unitwhere they coming on there as like why10800:07:39.480 --> 00:07:43.040are they coming? And let's saythey were. I mean we've suspected this10900:07:43.160 --> 00:07:46.430with a few women that have comeon the mobiltra sound unit that have offered11000:07:46.589 --> 00:07:49.230or that we've offered help to,is that they might be pro abortion moles11100:07:49.350 --> 00:07:54.470trying to figure out the operation andhow they can I don't know, use11200:07:54.550 --> 00:07:59.019our words to quote, expose usor whatever. Yeah, but the more11300:07:59.060 --> 00:08:01.779I've like thought about that concern andthe more we've talked about that concern,11400:08:01.860 --> 00:08:07.100it's like, well, with theyreally even be able to expose anything?11500:08:07.100 --> 00:08:09.939I mean the discover were really nicepeople who are offering a lot of real11600:08:11.060 --> 00:08:15.290health. Yeah, they'll discover thatthe stuff that we're actually offering we actually11700:08:15.329 --> 00:08:20.129carry through with, and so mayit. Let it be a moment.11800:08:20.250 --> 00:08:24.129So maybe this is kind of likea subprinciple. Yeah, is don't worry11900:08:24.170 --> 00:08:28.240about infiltration from pro abortion people aslong as you're consistent and you got nothing12000:08:28.279 --> 00:08:31.519to hide, like you know.I mean I'm thinking even like it's kind12100:08:31.519 --> 00:08:35.360of a personal scenario of to myif the FBI busted up in my house12200:08:35.399 --> 00:08:39.200and started did like a thorough searchof my house, right, I mean12300:08:39.240 --> 00:08:43.629they'd be probably they probably fall asleepbecause it'd be so bored at what they12400:08:43.669 --> 00:08:46.389found. Like they wouldn't find anything. You know I'm saying. So it's12500:08:46.389 --> 00:08:50.269like if you're not guilty, youhave nothing to worry about. Exactly.12600:08:50.389 --> 00:08:52.710So, if we're not lying tothese women, we're not manipulating and we're12700:08:52.710 --> 00:08:58.019not offering things that we don't actuallycarry through with. Right then we would12800:08:58.019 --> 00:09:01.059have a concern, but since weare consistent Christians, there's no concern there.12900:09:01.100 --> 00:09:05.139Anyway, the principle is treat everyoneas though there of abortion vulnerable when13000:09:05.139 --> 00:09:09.009you encounter them at the abortion centerand just carry on with the ministry that13100:09:09.049 --> 00:09:11.850God has called you to right,right, a little sort of side story,13200:09:11.889 --> 00:09:16.570but it was funny happened today whereone of the pro abortion people was13300:09:16.009 --> 00:09:20.570videotaping. She was like tipping openour blessing bag that we have on the13400:09:20.610 --> 00:09:26.120sidewalk, videotaping the contents, andwe're like why, why are you doing13500:09:26.200 --> 00:09:28.759this? You're going to discover thatwe actually give sort of Nice things.13600:09:28.840 --> 00:09:33.080Yeah, and in the blessing bagsout anyway. Yeah, don't don't worry13700:09:33.080 --> 00:09:37.320about that. Basically, just doyour job, do it what God has13800:09:37.399 --> 00:09:41.309called you to do. So soshe's comes on the RV and I did13900:09:41.389 --> 00:09:45.789what I always do, still wonderingshe might be a mole. She certainly14000:09:45.870 --> 00:09:50.269doesn't seem like she's taking this wholething very seriously. But but I found14100:09:50.269 --> 00:09:54.500out the situation. I asked abunch of questions. I found out she14200:09:54.620 --> 00:09:58.899was sixteen years old. She wasbeing urged by her Guardian, who was14300:09:58.980 --> 00:10:03.419her grandmother. Yeah, to havethe abortion and her boyfriend and friend were14400:10:03.500 --> 00:10:09.450obviously also counseling abhorred person. Butshe said she wanted to see the baby14500:10:09.610 --> 00:10:13.129first, and when she said thatthere was a change like I could tell14600:10:13.169 --> 00:10:18.649that was a sincere statement. Shewanted to see this baby first. So14700:10:18.690 --> 00:10:22.519I listed, as we always do. I listed the many resources that we14800:10:22.600 --> 00:10:26.919could provide. I talked about God, asked her if she knew God.14900:10:28.480 --> 00:10:31.519She claims she did, but shewas clearly not following God's commands, which15000:10:31.519 --> 00:10:35.600is usually the case. She youknow, if they're following God's commands are15100:10:35.600 --> 00:10:39.629not going to be at an abortioncenter. Yeah, but I asked her15200:10:39.669 --> 00:10:43.990if I could share some truths aboutGod and she immediately said yes, but15300:10:45.149 --> 00:10:48.870the friend didn't want anything to dowith that and the friend said I gotta15400:10:48.909 --> 00:10:54.820go and goes tearing off of theRV. She doesn't want to hear truths15500:10:54.860 --> 00:11:03.370about God. But surprisingly Marissa didstay and listened and told us that she15600:11:03.690 --> 00:11:09.730was being forced by her grandmother,but she knew, which is why she15700:11:09.850 --> 00:11:13.009was laughing all the time. Sheknew, although her friends didn't know.15800:11:13.529 --> 00:11:18.440That because she was sixteen and underage, therefore she would not be able to15900:11:18.600 --> 00:11:24.000get the abortion without her grandmother's writtenpermission, or I think the grandmother would16000:11:24.000 --> 00:11:31.279actually have to be there and signthe legal guardian. And so Marissa knew16100:11:31.000 --> 00:11:35.110that no abortion was going to happen. Yeah, to that day. Her16200:11:35.190 --> 00:11:41.710friends didn't know that, though.I shared the Gospel. Asked Marissa if16300:11:41.950 --> 00:11:48.820if she wanted to follow God andshe said she did so, following sharing16400:11:48.899 --> 00:11:52.779the Gospel, she actually wanted tocommit her life to Jesus and did so16500:11:52.019 --> 00:11:56.700right right then and there. Yeah, on on the RV, which happens16600:11:56.899 --> 00:12:01.970actually not infrequently. Yeah, especiallyoften times with younger people who have they've16700:12:01.009 --> 00:12:05.009come to the end of the rope. They they they know they're in a16800:12:05.090 --> 00:12:07.809bad place and they know they needthey need help. So as at that16900:12:09.090 --> 00:12:13.649point there's a banging on the RVdoor and the boyfriend is screaming. He's17000:12:13.929 --> 00:12:18.519furious. He now has discovered,oh, she went on the RV.17100:12:18.840 --> 00:12:22.960He figured out she had left theabortion center. So He's screaming at her17200:12:24.039 --> 00:12:26.919come out and do what you see, we came here to do. Come17300:12:26.960 --> 00:12:31.629out and aboard, and we actuallylocked him out Marissa was shouting leave us17400:12:31.669 --> 00:12:37.549alone. She she said she's notgoing to abort and she's not coming out.17500:12:37.230 --> 00:12:41.750And at that point I assure Marissathat I will drive her home,17600:12:43.110 --> 00:12:48.700okay, and a fellow counselor whohears me say that. I don't know17700:12:48.779 --> 00:12:50.460if she would. I think thefellow counselor was on the RV at the17800:12:50.580 --> 00:12:54.980time and she said, well,you're not going to go alone. I17900:12:54.019 --> 00:12:58.179think she was shadowing me, soshe's watching what I do. Said I'll18000:12:58.179 --> 00:13:01.090go with you. Yeah, I'lldrive home from home with you, and18100:13:01.409 --> 00:13:05.929so we bring the the up signednurse Brings Merca back to see her baby.18200:13:07.049 --> 00:13:11.330This just further solidifies her choice forlife. She loved the baby.18300:13:11.610 --> 00:13:16.600Yeah, okay. Well, thenext principle in this is exactly what you18400:13:16.720 --> 00:13:20.200did and what's an important thing foryou to do, and this requires listening,18500:13:20.320 --> 00:13:24.919but it's develop a relationship and tryto understand the dynamics of the reason18600:13:26.039 --> 00:13:28.309why the mother is there at theabortion center. So you have to listen.18700:13:28.350 --> 00:13:31.509Yeah, and that's the thing thatmany of these women are not used18800:13:31.549 --> 00:13:37.750to, someone that actually listens andcares. Yeah, you're supposed to be18900:13:37.870 --> 00:13:41.269listening and that helps you build arelationship, and you can build a relationship19000:13:41.269 --> 00:13:45.779with these MOMS and ultimately earn theirtrust, right, by letting them know19100:13:45.940 --> 00:13:50.820you care. Yeah, and,of course, hearing at what the the19200:13:50.139 --> 00:13:54.179things that are actually going on inher life, the stuff she struggled with,19300:13:54.340 --> 00:13:56.889the pressure, the coercion that's comingfrom the people that she trusts,19400:13:58.330 --> 00:14:01.850her guardian, her grandmother, theboyfriend who she's obviously at least in some19500:14:01.970 --> 00:14:07.570way, intimately involved, right.Yeah, those people have really betrayed her19600:14:07.610 --> 00:14:09.519trust. You want to try toearn her trust? Yeah, by building19700:14:09.559 --> 00:14:15.240that relationship and, of course,in this situation, one of the touch19800:14:15.320 --> 00:14:18.200points, one of the basis isof that relationship is really the Gospel.19900:14:18.399 --> 00:14:22.639It was sharing the Gospel. Itwas she knew that was something that she20000:14:22.759 --> 00:14:26.429needed. It often is. Evenwhen they say I don't want to hear20100:14:26.470 --> 00:14:30.549about God, oftentimes they will comeback circle, back to God. If20200:14:30.950 --> 00:14:35.389if you pray to God to openthat door. But in terms of trust20300:14:35.669 --> 00:14:39.460and the betrayal, you wouldn't believewhat happens next. I mean really,20400:14:41.860 --> 00:14:46.340the betrayal of the people who weresupposed to protect her was so devastating,20500:14:48.139 --> 00:14:54.330and not only in what had happenedthat day. So the but after the20600:14:54.450 --> 00:14:58.929ultrasound, I we she did notwant to get back in that boyfriend's car.20700:15:00.009 --> 00:15:03.649I didn't. I didn't want herto either. Was I don't know20800:15:03.769 --> 00:15:09.600if that was wise or not.We've got this angry boyfriend who's literally banging20900:15:09.720 --> 00:15:13.320on the sting, on the doorexactly. So obviously a bit. It's21000:15:13.320 --> 00:15:18.279got an angry issue and possibly violent. But I was not going to send21100:15:18.320 --> 00:15:22.230her home with with this angry boyfriendin the car, the angry boyfriend.21200:15:22.950 --> 00:15:28.750So I hurried her to my carwith my fellow counselor, and the boyfriend21300:15:28.909 --> 00:15:31.230spotted us and he got he wascoming around the corner. So he's out21400:15:31.230 --> 00:15:35.980of his car. So as wejump in my car, he's running to21500:15:35.139 --> 00:15:41.340his car, Aligne I know now, and chases on and and so I21600:15:41.899 --> 00:15:46.899I take off as fast as Ican and just turned a lot of corners,21700:15:46.980 --> 00:15:50.929quick corners, into to lose him. And then we waited and we21800:15:50.009 --> 00:15:54.490knew that that we had indeed lawmost him. We saw him go by.21900:15:54.529 --> 00:15:56.929Actually, yeah, so we did. And he's going a thousand miles22000:15:56.970 --> 00:16:03.490an hour and didn't see us.So I had Marissa take me to her22100:16:03.649 --> 00:16:07.120home by circuitous roots, so incase he caught up with us, that22200:16:07.679 --> 00:16:15.200he would he would never find us. And it did occur to me as22300:16:15.320 --> 00:16:19.509I'm driving, I hope I'm notdoing something stupid, Uh Huh, and22400:16:19.990 --> 00:16:25.750as it turns out, I probablywas. But but it got more stupidest22500:16:26.789 --> 00:16:32.149as the story progresses. But allthat it is in my head is this22600:16:32.350 --> 00:16:37.460is a desperate teen who needs ourhelp. Yeah, and I am determined22700:16:37.500 --> 00:16:41.259to help her. Yeah, Imean she obviously didn't want to abort.22800:16:41.740 --> 00:16:45.220She was obviously being coerced, whichis illegal. Which is illegal? Yeah,22900:16:45.500 --> 00:16:49.769yeah, and so you're helping herto to protect that baby and to23000:16:49.889 --> 00:16:52.529do the thing that she wants todo, which that's R that baby.23100:16:52.649 --> 00:16:57.210That's right. So we reach herhome and as we pull in, it's23200:16:57.250 --> 00:17:03.960kind of a really sketchy apartment,probably a kind of a project, and23300:17:03.279 --> 00:17:10.599there is a whole line up ofangry looking young men and the grandmother with23400:17:10.720 --> 00:17:17.230their arms cross as her pulling intothe driveway and and Marissa and they're kind23500:17:17.230 --> 00:17:22.150of blocking my car and then theystart to walk towards my car and Marissa23600:17:22.269 --> 00:17:26.869said, I can't, I can't, I cannot kill this baby, and23700:17:26.069 --> 00:17:30.819I can't get out of the carand I and so I just slam the23800:17:30.940 --> 00:17:37.220car into reverse and we take off. They came storming, running, running23900:17:37.259 --> 00:17:40.900after us. But you know,of course I'm in a car. So24000:17:41.980 --> 00:17:49.130I take off and I am drivingdown the interstate now having no idea what24100:17:49.450 --> 00:17:55.089to do, and I had thecounselor with me start to make some calls24200:17:55.650 --> 00:17:57.680to look for a safe house.You know, just call, call our24300:17:57.759 --> 00:18:04.160network, find a safe place whereI can bring this poor young teen.24400:18:04.599 --> 00:18:10.839And, as God would have it, God is amazing. God always has24500:18:11.000 --> 00:18:18.509his plan worked out. There wasa family that had been praying specifically that24600:18:18.950 --> 00:18:25.549an abortion minded teen would be broughtto their home for safety, and one24700:18:25.630 --> 00:18:29.819of the people that we called toldus about this family. Yeah, and24800:18:30.700 --> 00:18:34.339so that's our plan. We,the counselors sitting next to me, is24900:18:34.380 --> 00:18:38.980making the calls and making the arrangementsand we're going to bring Marissa to this25000:18:40.180 --> 00:18:44.089family. Then I got a callon the telephone, on my phone,25100:18:44.130 --> 00:18:48.089and I answer it. It's thepolice and they said, is this Vicky25200:18:48.210 --> 00:18:53.250Soandso? Yes, that's that's me. Are you harboring a teen? They25300:18:53.329 --> 00:18:59.920asked me, and I said,well, that's not what I was thinking25400:19:00.039 --> 00:19:03.640I was doing. But I dohave a young woman in the car with25500:19:03.839 --> 00:19:08.640me who is being coursed by hergrandmother to abort and she does not want25600:19:08.680 --> 00:19:15.750an abortion. We do have asafe house and that's where I was going25700:19:15.829 --> 00:19:19.549to bring her, and the policesuggested that instead I bring the team to25800:19:19.670 --> 00:19:25.180the police station and they would theywould take care of it. So,25900:19:25.500 --> 00:19:30.460once we get there, they takeboth me and my counselor friends driver's license26000:19:30.500 --> 00:19:36.140and tells us that we would probablynot be charged with kidnapping a minor,26100:19:36.259 --> 00:19:40.250which entailed jail time. Yeah,you were, you were. We were26200:19:40.289 --> 00:19:42.730sweating it out there a bit.What I want to know before we share26300:19:42.769 --> 00:19:45.529the principle that has to go withthis. How in the world that they26400:19:45.569 --> 00:19:51.690get your phone number, because that'sa mystery. Well, I had given26500:19:51.769 --> 00:19:56.880the information, I'd given the pamphlet. That's a very good question and it26600:19:56.079 --> 00:20:02.000never even occurred to me. Ihad g given the pamphlet to the girl26700:20:02.119 --> 00:20:04.960in the back seat. She leftit there when she went into the abortion26800:20:06.160 --> 00:20:10.390center. Okay, so and onthat pamphlet is my name and phone.26900:20:10.509 --> 00:20:14.789Okay, so that's how they figuredout. Yeah, okay. Well,27000:20:15.230 --> 00:20:18.630the principle that goes along with thispart of the story. This is important27100:20:18.670 --> 00:20:22.500one, guys, is have aclear understanding of the law, because if27200:20:22.539 --> 00:20:26.779you don't have a clear understanding ofthe law, and even now it's still27300:20:26.980 --> 00:20:32.140some of the guess understanding and nuancesof the law as it concerns harboring a27400:20:32.299 --> 00:20:36.289team are still not clear. Butat least having a clear understanding of what27500:20:36.329 --> 00:20:38.609you're doing, what you're getting yourselfinto. I think this is this is27600:20:38.730 --> 00:20:42.769probably a principle that we should haveknown at this point. This is kind27700:20:42.769 --> 00:20:47.170of one of the mistakes that wehave learned from and how to handle these27800:20:47.210 --> 00:20:52.240situations moving forward. Yeah, sothat when you're when you are talking to27900:20:52.359 --> 00:20:56.160the police, you can kind ofgive them an understanding of the perspective that28000:20:56.200 --> 00:21:00.000you're coming from, what you understandthe law to be. And then even28100:21:00.079 --> 00:21:03.470with the teen and considering giving herride home and all of that, and28200:21:03.589 --> 00:21:07.230understanding what you're getting yourself into,or potentially getting yourself into. Now,28300:21:07.269 --> 00:21:10.869again, this is a life anddeath situation. Yeah, and this is28400:21:11.109 --> 00:21:15.789very clearly not coercion on your part. This is coercion on the part of28500:21:15.869 --> 00:21:18.230the grandmother, right, and thefact that you were able to go to28600:21:18.269 --> 00:21:21.420the police station and help kind of, because coercion is illegal. Right.28700:21:21.460 --> 00:21:25.660Yeah, driving a team from pointa to point B is not necessarily illegal28800:21:25.700 --> 00:21:27.500if they've asked you to, andall of that right right now. If28900:21:27.539 --> 00:21:33.329you were intentionally keeping them away fortheir family, took them to your house29000:21:33.369 --> 00:21:34.970and locked them in your house orsomething like that, that would be a29100:21:36.009 --> 00:21:37.450different story. But that's not whatyou were doing. All the things that29200:21:37.569 --> 00:21:41.569you were doing, even when youleft her house, that was all her29300:21:42.250 --> 00:21:48.119her word, her request, right, yeah, and and so just understanding29400:21:48.160 --> 00:21:51.240the law, having a clear understandingof these things before you get into these29500:21:51.279 --> 00:21:55.720things is very helpful. And youknow, just in general, when you've29600:21:55.720 --> 00:22:00.710got a minor in the situation,that does become a fairly complicated situation.29700:22:00.910 --> 00:22:03.670It does, because you know inretrospect, what would I have done?29800:22:03.750 --> 00:22:07.910What could I have done differently?I don't know that I would not have29900:22:07.990 --> 00:22:11.710offered the ride of because I thinkyou start calling police with the young,30000:22:11.869 --> 00:22:18.180scared teen with a dysfunctional family,which clearly it was, they might just30100:22:18.339 --> 00:22:22.460bolt and that might be the lastyou're going to hear from them. Yeah,30200:22:22.740 --> 00:22:27.460but when I was actually driving,I probably should have just immediately thought30300:22:27.819 --> 00:22:32.329I need to bring her to thepolice. Yeah, so she didn't want30400:22:32.410 --> 00:22:38.089that, she didn't want to getDSS involved, but ultimately DSS was involved.30500:22:38.130 --> 00:22:42.250So that that is actually what happened. It's the police promised me that30600:22:42.369 --> 00:22:47.559DSS would be called and actually Marissawanted that more than being returned to the30700:22:47.599 --> 00:22:51.559grandmother. Yeah, because she wantedthat baby. She knew that she couldn't30800:22:51.559 --> 00:22:53.400kill the baby and she knew ifshe goes home to granny, Granny's gonna30900:22:55.200 --> 00:22:59.750and says she killed the baby.So I thought I was leaving Marissa safe31000:22:59.750 --> 00:23:03.349and sound at the police that shewas going to call me to get the31100:23:03.509 --> 00:23:07.750help that we could offer the baby, shower whatever. DSS was getting involved31200:23:07.869 --> 00:23:11.950and she would be safe that night. The police assured me she would be31300:23:11.990 --> 00:23:15.539safe that night. Yeah. Well, the next morning I'm on the abortion31400:23:15.619 --> 00:23:22.059center sidewalk again and I get acall again from Marissa and she is sobbing.31500:23:22.619 --> 00:23:27.210The police had returned her to agrandmother the night before. I don't31600:23:27.250 --> 00:23:30.930know why. I don't remember whyif they tried to call the SS or31700:23:32.009 --> 00:23:34.329what happened, but she was returnedto her grandmother. In the morning her31800:23:34.450 --> 00:23:38.849grandmother woke her up early in themorning. Marissa had diabetes, I believe,31900:23:40.009 --> 00:23:42.960some some terrible disease where she hadto have regular medication. Yeah,32000:23:44.240 --> 00:23:48.480her grandmother woke her up, didnot give her her medication, takes the32100:23:48.559 --> 00:23:52.880Groggy Marissa throws her in the car, or tells her get in the car.32200:23:52.000 --> 00:23:56.190I'm she said she's taken her toa doctor appointment and convinced her it32300:23:56.269 --> 00:24:00.309was a doctor appointment to see thebaby. But as they're driving, Marissa32400:24:00.470 --> 00:24:04.990quickly begins to discern they're on thesame route back to the abortion center.32500:24:06.109 --> 00:24:08.109She knows what her grandmother is doingnow. The grandmother has figured out she32600:24:08.190 --> 00:24:11.779has to go with Marissa to signthe papers and she's going to make sure32700:24:11.859 --> 00:24:18.099Marissa has has the abortion. Sowhen Marissa realizes this, as the car32800:24:18.299 --> 00:24:22.019slows to a stop at part wayon the way to the abortion center,32900:24:22.740 --> 00:24:26.809slowing for a stop light or whatever, while the car still moving, Marissa33000:24:26.970 --> 00:24:32.970jumps out of the car, rollsdown an embankment and runs to the near33100:24:33.210 --> 00:24:37.049wrist hiding place, which was alows department store, and was hiding in33200:24:37.210 --> 00:24:41.880one of the aisles where she calledme. Well, so this time I33300:24:41.759 --> 00:24:45.799knew, okay, I'm not goingto go rush to the rescue. I33400:24:45.960 --> 00:24:49.200need to call the police. SoI told her, you know, this33500:24:49.319 --> 00:24:53.789is abduct abduction and coercion. Clear, clearly drinking the law of the grandmother.33600:24:53.869 --> 00:24:57.990So I said call the police,stay hiding, call the police and33700:24:59.190 --> 00:25:02.349then call me back. Tell thepolice we have a safe house for you,33800:25:02.750 --> 00:25:07.180and then I want you to callme back. So so the police33900:25:07.299 --> 00:25:10.700pick her up, they bring herto the station, they contact the grandmother34000:25:10.940 --> 00:25:15.859and the grandmother said keep her,I don't honor wow. And the police34100:25:17.059 --> 00:25:21.609then called me instead of calling DSS, which I thought was pretty impressive.34200:25:22.089 --> 00:25:26.690They called called me and said weunderstand you have a safe house and this34300:25:26.890 --> 00:25:32.049girl is traumatized. She she needsa place. Would you be willing to34400:25:32.089 --> 00:25:36.680come and get her? The grandmotheris willing to sign over temporary it wasn't34500:25:36.720 --> 00:25:40.480custody, I can't remember what itwas called, but just the temporary rights34600:25:40.680 --> 00:25:45.480to bring her child to the safehouse. And so the grandmother was there,34700:25:47.039 --> 00:25:52.630signed Marissa over to me and wewith the police. I went with34800:25:52.789 --> 00:25:57.150the police and Marissa to the grandmother'shouse, where she got the essential things34900:25:57.269 --> 00:26:03.630she would she would need eat andwe drive her to the safe house.35000:26:03.230 --> 00:26:07.180And that family actually had agreed toas long as it took, but we35100:26:07.299 --> 00:26:11.299all thought it was going to bejust a few weeks because I had already35200:26:11.380 --> 00:26:15.819lined up, or our counselors,as I can't remember who was me specifically,35300:26:15.819 --> 00:26:18.650or the network of people helping mehead lined up a maternity home that35400:26:18.809 --> 00:26:23.490takes teams and could keep her tillage twenty one, which really solved all35500:26:23.569 --> 00:26:30.849the problems. But but because ofher residency there, there it took months35600:26:32.049 --> 00:26:34.480and as safe family had to findshe was in a different state than the35700:26:36.079 --> 00:26:40.000family and also in the maternity home. That's correct, and so it complicated35800:26:40.079 --> 00:26:42.359things. The paperwork was taking month. She was literally with that safe family35900:26:42.480 --> 00:26:47.000for months and finally it was justtoo much. The same family had agreed36000:26:47.039 --> 00:26:52.789to weeks and here it's going onmonth. So at at that point she36100:26:52.910 --> 00:26:57.549actually was moved into a maternity homein her home state and and that was36200:26:57.630 --> 00:27:03.299where we temporarily lost touch with her. Yeah, and so the principle here36300:27:03.539 --> 00:27:08.180is as best we make plans,and we should make plans and arrange things36400:27:08.259 --> 00:27:12.460and, like we talked about inour last podcast about this utilizing team members36500:27:12.500 --> 00:27:17.769and getting people to make appointments andand set things up, and you did36600:27:17.890 --> 00:27:22.970that. But plans can go awrysometimes. To the principal was take one36700:27:23.089 --> 00:27:29.009logical, God given step with thegoal of keeping the baby safe, one36800:27:29.130 --> 00:27:32.599step at a time. May Makeplans and yeah, and connect with the36900:27:32.640 --> 00:27:37.559eternity homes and find a safe homehouse, like you did, but just37000:27:37.720 --> 00:27:41.000be ready, be flexible that sometimesplans don't work out like we hope that37100:27:41.039 --> 00:27:47.549they would. Sometimes the even issuescan arise with like the maternity home and37200:27:47.549 --> 00:27:52.109then not being able to transfer herover from state to state. Right,37300:27:52.190 --> 00:27:56.789there's complications. Listen, the enemyis going to get in wherever he can.37400:27:56.430 --> 00:28:00.539Yeah, with the goal of gettingthat young lady back to the abortion37500:28:00.700 --> 00:28:03.500center, getting her trusting an abortionrather than trusting in the Lord. Right.37600:28:03.940 --> 00:28:08.579So just be flexible, be readyto change plans, be ready to37700:28:10.619 --> 00:28:14.569operate on the fly sometimes, yeah, and in the Lord will give you37800:28:14.650 --> 00:28:17.769grace in those situations. You willin another principle. We talked about this37900:28:17.930 --> 00:28:19.930with our other case study, butI think it bears repeating. It's such38000:28:19.930 --> 00:28:25.450an important one as to use teammembers. I certainly could not have even38100:28:25.450 --> 00:28:30.720begun to have done what what didtranspire all on my own. There there38200:28:30.960 --> 00:28:34.279was a whole network of people behindthe scenes working and helping and making calls,38300:28:34.440 --> 00:28:37.680even the council that came with me. That kept me calm. The38400:28:37.799 --> 00:28:44.869whole team was called in to playand was really, really important for for38500:28:45.029 --> 00:28:49.430us to to work together as ateam. So Marissa actually didn't totally lose38600:28:49.869 --> 00:28:53.349lose touch. She did stay intouch. She had my name and number.38700:28:53.990 --> 00:28:59.099We knew that she was happy atat that maternity home and she actually38800:28:59.500 --> 00:29:03.740had a beautiful baby who she loveddeeply. Love Life. At the time38900:29:03.900 --> 00:29:07.460it wasn't love life yet. Socities for life, I believe, with39000:29:07.619 --> 00:29:12.329the help of truth and mercy ministries, which is a a baby shower ministry,39100:29:12.410 --> 00:29:18.809through Sheryl Chandler, through her awonderful baby shower for her baby and39200:29:18.690 --> 00:29:26.319the story really became one of redemption. That grandmother. Turns out that she39300:29:26.440 --> 00:29:30.400had dementia, which was worsening andworsening and worsening. I guess they didn't39400:29:30.400 --> 00:29:34.640know it at the time. Yeah, but that was what all that craziness39500:29:36.000 --> 00:29:44.150was in part, was mental illness. And Marissa actually returned to the grandmother's39600:29:44.190 --> 00:29:47.990home and ended up taking care ofthe grandmother. And so there was a39700:29:48.950 --> 00:29:53.420full kind of circle, yea ofredemption that came about in the grandmother was39800:29:53.500 --> 00:29:59.140at the baby shower and she wasso in love with that little baby,39900:29:59.220 --> 00:30:04.140the baby that she had so desperatelywanted to kill. So it just showed40000:30:04.420 --> 00:30:15.410that the power of God to toredeem anything, including Marissa, really could40100:30:15.410 --> 00:30:22.240have been very rightfully furious with thatgrandmother, but turned around and showed the40200:30:22.319 --> 00:30:25.720love of God, yeah, andtook care of that grandmother. Yeah,40300:30:25.960 --> 00:30:29.839absolutely, and that's listen, guys, you're going to hear this throughout all40400:30:29.920 --> 00:30:33.240of these hardcase stories, all ofthese case studies, because we're a gospel40500:30:33.240 --> 00:30:37.309centered ministry, unapologetically right, we'rethere to bring the Gospel and bring help40600:30:37.349 --> 00:30:41.869and hope. Yeah, yeah,but this, this last principle, was40700:30:41.950 --> 00:30:45.309the most important principle to remember inall of these hard cases. Nothing is40800:30:45.349 --> 00:30:49.259impossible with God, right, wehave to lean on the Lord. Yeah,40900:30:49.740 --> 00:30:56.660we can make connections and we cancome up with plans and schemes and41000:30:56.819 --> 00:31:00.259ideas and try to navigate through things, and God gives us wisdom, God41100:31:00.339 --> 00:31:03.930gives us mental capacity to be abit of figured some of these problems out41200:31:03.930 --> 00:31:08.769and navigate through some of these things. But ultimately we've got to trust in41300:31:08.809 --> 00:31:14.049the Lord. We've got to stay, as the Bible says and John Chapter41400:31:14.210 --> 00:31:18.880Fifteen, attached to the true vine. Jesus has wisdom that we got right.41500:31:18.440 --> 00:31:22.240He's got the ability to see behindthe scenes and to work these situations41600:31:22.359 --> 00:31:26.680through that we don't have. Wedon't have that ability, but he does.41700:31:26.799 --> 00:31:30.400And so, just for the Lord, I mean this is just prim41800:31:30.559 --> 00:31:33.910evidence that the Lord is fateful,that he's good and that nothing is impossible41900:31:33.910 --> 00:31:38.150with him. Whereas you shared justbefore, this grandmother wanted that child dead,42000:31:38.430 --> 00:31:41.630so much so that she tricked hergranddaughter to get into the car since42100:31:41.630 --> 00:31:45.789she could drive her to the abortioncenter and further pressure her to have the42200:31:45.829 --> 00:31:48.940abortion that obviously didn't want. Andyet God can take that situation and turn42300:31:48.980 --> 00:31:52.779it right side up, so muchso that that grandmothers at the baby shower42400:31:53.220 --> 00:31:57.220delighting in her great grandchild. Yeah, that's amazing. It's amazing how God42500:31:57.380 --> 00:32:00.819can do that, but God can. And so, guys, I want42600:32:00.819 --> 00:32:06.049to encourage'all trust in the Lord. We can never get as your prolife42700:32:06.170 --> 00:32:09.609ministers, we can never get intothis mentality that we've got it figured out,42800:32:09.890 --> 00:32:15.450that these practical principles, and weshared some practical principles can somehow supersede42900:32:15.529 --> 00:32:20.240the wisdom of God. They cannot. Practical Principles, preparation, training and43000:32:20.359 --> 00:32:22.920all of that stuff that, allthat stuff can be great, but if43100:32:22.000 --> 00:32:28.599that stuff excludes God, then thatstuff is going to leave you deficient and43200:32:28.799 --> 00:32:31.269stand in a major way, andso we need the Lord. That's why43300:32:31.309 --> 00:32:36.549I always encourage with our local volunteers, with our cybwalk missionaries around the country,43400:32:36.549 --> 00:32:39.230around the world, stay in prayer, stay in the word and stay43500:32:39.269 --> 00:32:43.309in church. These are some ofthe means that God has given us to43600:32:43.349 --> 00:32:46.019stay in close fellowship with him sothat we can stay, as John Fifteen43700:32:46.059 --> 00:32:51.059again says, attached to the truevine, because we need what God has.43800:32:51.460 --> 00:32:55.259Wisdom, grace, ability, allof these things that we need God43900:32:55.460 --> 00:32:59.289has. And so that's our encouragement. Do you guess? Yeah, and44000:32:59.369 --> 00:33:01.049I hope this story was a blessingand encouragement. Do you guys? Hope44100:33:01.049 --> 00:33:06.329you learned from some of our mistakesand I hope you'll continue to learn as44200:33:06.369 --> 00:33:08.369we share some of these case studieswith you, guys. Again, if44300:33:08.410 --> 00:33:12.529you, as we've often shared andwe always will in these podcasts, share44400:33:12.569 --> 00:33:15.480our contact info. If you havequestions about this story or if you have44500:33:15.599 --> 00:33:17.960subjects you'd like for us to cover, you can reach out to me,44600:33:19.039 --> 00:33:21.720Daniel a love life dot org.You can reach out to her, Vicky44700:33:21.799 --> 00:33:24.240at Love Life Dot Org. We'dlove to hear from you. Our website44800:33:24.279 --> 00:33:30.869that we post these articles on iswww dot sidewalks for lifecom sidewalks. The44900:33:30.869 --> 00:33:36.990number four lifecom. You can lookunder equipping articles and that's where we share45000:33:37.390 --> 00:33:39.950the articles that kind of are theframework for these podcasts, and you'll see45100:33:40.069 --> 00:33:44.259a bunch of them there. Thoseare to equip you to be effective on45200:33:44.339 --> 00:33:46.700the sidewalk, and so again,you reach out to us. Please leave45300:33:46.740 --> 00:33:52.220a review on the PODCAST, pleaseshare it with other people and until next45400:33:52.220 --> 00:34:05.690time, God bless give me ourlove for love, give me our love45500:34:05.930 --> 00:34:17.360for gratitude. I know it willcost me my life. Nothing's too precious45600:34:17.639 --> 00:34:20.000in some you