Balancing Family and Ministry

WEBVTT100:00:00.560 --> 00:00:06.400I Am Yours, I am yours, I am yours and me Lord,200:00:06.879 --> 00:00:11.470I am yours, I am your. Welcome to the Gospel Center pro life300:00:11.509 --> 00:00:14.869podcast. In this episode we're goingto talk about how to balance family and400:00:15.029 --> 00:00:18.149ministry. This is a very importantsubject, so please stay with us.500:00:18.510 --> 00:00:28.219Me Lord, Send Me, Lord. I felt show passish, touch your600:00:28.780 --> 00:00:38.770heart. Use Me, Lord.Welcome to the Gospel Center pro life podcast.700:00:38.850 --> 00:00:43.530Appreciate you guys tuning in and wewill jump right into our subject.800:00:43.929 --> 00:00:47.810It's an important subject and hopefully,because this will be coming out, or900:00:47.810 --> 00:00:52.479actually recording in the old year,but this will be coming out in the1000:00:52.640 --> 00:00:56.600new year. Let's see, StarTwenty one. So first recording for the1100:00:56.719 --> 00:01:00.560new year, if it will be. Yes, so good to see you1200:01:00.640 --> 00:01:06.069guys this year. Yeah, butI think it's an important topic that we1300:01:06.310 --> 00:01:11.189have dealt with with our I'd sayour sidewalk missionaries, also our local sidewalk1400:01:11.189 --> 00:01:15.069volunteers. It's a constant thing thatcomes up, that with personally in my1500:01:15.230 --> 00:01:19.980life. You've dealt with this personallyin your life? Yep, in one1600:01:19.019 --> 00:01:23.219of our sidewalk counselors here locally.Actually, kind of, I guess,1700:01:23.219 --> 00:01:26.659spurred me on to talk to youabout doing a podcast. You write an1800:01:26.700 --> 00:01:34.170article that will go long with thispodcast about balancing family and ministry, and1900:01:34.650 --> 00:01:41.489so I thought some of the principlesthat I have employed as a minister and2000:01:42.530 --> 00:01:45.969even a pastor in my past,had been a pastor for about nine years,2100:01:46.489 --> 00:01:49.920and then some of the things,strategies and Biblical concepts that you've employed2200:01:49.959 --> 00:01:53.879and being out on the sidewalks wouldhelp you, guys that are listening.2300:01:53.840 --> 00:02:00.640And so we want to jump intothis subject, balancing family and ministry.2400:02:00.719 --> 00:02:04.269Yeah, both are important. Bothare critical parts of my life, for2500:02:04.430 --> 00:02:08.389sure, any dedicated, committed Christianslife. Yeah, so, and it's2600:02:08.430 --> 00:02:13.669one of the most commonly voice strugglesis how do I balance the demands of2700:02:13.830 --> 00:02:21.259family and ministry, because they're bothimportant, they're both their intensive. You2800:02:21.659 --> 00:02:25.060need to devote a lot of timeor you can lose one or the others.2900:02:25.259 --> 00:02:31.889So, yeah, how do webalance and and prioritize? And it's3000:02:32.009 --> 00:02:38.409it creates a tension. I thinkit's one of the most common tensions voiced3100:02:38.650 --> 00:02:43.490by our counselors and that we getquestions about how do you do it?3200:02:44.400 --> 00:02:47.560So yeah, the I think,as in all things, I will say3300:02:47.759 --> 00:02:51.759that, as we were even goingthrough this article and just kind of honing3400:02:51.840 --> 00:02:54.520in what are the points that wewanted to touch on, we came to3500:02:54.599 --> 00:03:00.030realize that there's some tension here,even in our own lives, I mean3600:03:00.069 --> 00:03:02.550the tension between you guys will seein some of the points that we share.3700:03:04.469 --> 00:03:08.150Keeping God first, but also yourfirst ministry being to your family.3800:03:08.229 --> 00:03:12.509There's our first two points. Sothere's a tension there because, as will3900:03:13.060 --> 00:03:17.939as we go along, you guyswill see sometimes you can use family tension4000:03:19.020 --> 00:03:23.620and struggles in your family to justifynot obeying the Lord. Right, right.4100:03:23.699 --> 00:03:25.060So how do you balance that?How do you how do you get4200:03:25.060 --> 00:03:28.810through that struggle? So we're goingto talk about how you do that.4300:03:29.090 --> 00:03:32.090Hopefully we're going to give you,guess, some principles to to employ yourselves.4400:03:32.490 --> 00:03:37.490Yeah, and probably leave you stillwith some biblical tension. Yeah,4500:03:38.009 --> 00:03:40.479we're not going to be figuring itall out for you and checking all the4600:03:40.520 --> 00:03:44.479boxes for you. You got toseek the Lord Yourself. You've got to4700:03:44.520 --> 00:03:47.080find out what the Lord has foryou and for your family. So let's4800:03:47.120 --> 00:03:51.400jump into it, and I thinkthat helps, knowing that the struggle and4900:03:51.439 --> 00:03:54.120the tension is universal and is real. Yeah, and and it's not going5000:03:54.120 --> 00:03:59.069to be resolved by this podcast.I can be resolved by anything, because5100:03:59.830 --> 00:04:04.389they there are competing interest and sothat I think that these can guide,5200:04:04.789 --> 00:04:10.460but they're not going to completely solved. Yeah, that are eliminate that tension.5300:04:10.539 --> 00:04:14.460So the first one, our firstpriority is to God. Yeah.5400:04:14.699 --> 00:04:17.420Yeah, and of course, Imean if you're a Christian, you realize5500:04:17.500 --> 00:04:21.459this as a biblical concept, right. Yeah, we're called to love God5600:04:21.939 --> 00:04:27.610above everything else. Yeah, what'sthe Great Command? Love the Lord,5700:04:27.689 --> 00:04:30.129your God, with all your heart, art, mind, soul and strength.5800:04:30.410 --> 00:04:33.930Yeah, so right away, Potensilove God first, and right away5900:04:33.970 --> 00:04:39.079the tension is created. Okay,your focus, your priority, everything is6000:04:39.279 --> 00:04:43.360on God first. And yet you'vegot a baby at home. Yeah,6100:04:43.879 --> 00:04:46.879you've got a wife at home orhusband at home, been there, got6200:04:46.079 --> 00:04:53.350dogs that need feeding and and soso there's there is only so many hours6300:04:53.430 --> 00:04:58.110in the day, so much energyand emotional strength that any single person has.6400:04:58.709 --> 00:05:04.189How do you make sure that Godis your priority without neglecting other things?6500:05:04.230 --> 00:05:08.980So we have a good verse right. Yeah, it's probably a verseity6600:05:09.139 --> 00:05:12.660that you, guys, as soonas I mentioned this topic, or at6700:05:12.860 --> 00:05:16.939least this point here under this topic, that came to your mind is he6800:05:17.060 --> 00:05:20.730who loves father and mother more thanme is not worthy of me. He6900:05:20.850 --> 00:05:25.209who loves son or daughter more thanme is not worthy of me. He7000:05:25.490 --> 00:05:28.930does not take up his cross andfollow me is not worthy of me.7100:05:29.490 --> 00:05:31.529He who finds his life will loseit, and he who loses his life7200:05:31.889 --> 00:05:35.360for my sake will find it.Yeah, and so we're called to lose7300:05:35.399 --> 00:05:40.439our life for the sake of theGospel. We're called to serve the Lord7400:05:40.560 --> 00:05:45.920above all other things, above allother people, including our parents, including7500:05:45.959 --> 00:05:51.069our children, including our wives.And so that's a biblical reality that we7600:05:51.149 --> 00:05:55.269have to do with. God isfirst. God is supposed to be first.7700:05:55.350 --> 00:05:59.189God is first, even above yourwife, even a of your husband.7800:05:59.589 --> 00:06:03.740Goddess first, right, but underGod being first, I believe the7900:06:03.899 --> 00:06:11.699next point follows that our first ministryis to our family, priority, first,8000:06:11.779 --> 00:06:15.899priority, God. YEA, thatour first ministry. So it is8100:06:15.060 --> 00:06:21.569to because God is first, thosethings that are most important to God should8200:06:21.569 --> 00:06:26.449be most important to us, right. Yeah, and I think this point8300:06:26.529 --> 00:06:30.410is established in First Timothy, ChapterFive. Yeah, that's good one,8400:06:30.689 --> 00:06:35.639and verse eight. M and itsays if anyone does not provide for his8500:06:35.720 --> 00:06:41.199own especially for those of his household. He has denied the faith and is8600:06:41.319 --> 00:06:46.389worst than an unbeliever. Yeah,the context here is providing physical necessities and8700:06:46.550 --> 00:06:50.430things and talking about those who arewidowed and and all of that. So8800:06:50.470 --> 00:06:55.470if you have widows that that needto be cared for, if you have8900:06:55.550 --> 00:06:59.509a grandmother who's widowed and needs tobe cared for, you shouldn't be casting9000:06:59.990 --> 00:07:04.060the responsibility off on the church oranyone else. That's your responsibility. But9100:07:04.100 --> 00:07:08.980I think this concept can carry throughto just be on physical I mean,9200:07:09.019 --> 00:07:12.459if you think of a man whodoesn't provide food for his family, doesn't9300:07:12.459 --> 00:07:15.370provide he goes off and, youknow whatever, gambles or does drugs or9400:07:15.410 --> 00:07:18.490whatever, you think that guy's justa scumbag. Right. He's not providing9500:07:18.529 --> 00:07:25.610the basic necessities. But your childrenalso need oversight, your cheating children also9600:07:25.689 --> 00:07:30.439need discipline. Your children need beon food, they need their father to9700:07:30.560 --> 00:07:33.360be near to them, to givethem God, I'm they need love,9800:07:33.560 --> 00:07:36.839quality time, quantity time. Yeah, kids need all of that, and9900:07:36.920 --> 00:07:41.959so I think this, this concepthere carries through with all of those different10000:07:42.439 --> 00:07:46.149things that we're supposed to provide forour children, but also that we're supposed10100:07:46.149 --> 00:07:50.069to provide for our wives. Sowe're supposed to provide protection for our wives,10200:07:50.110 --> 00:07:54.069we're supposed to be there for ourfamilies. Yeah, and so I'll10300:07:54.069 --> 00:07:58.149say, because God is first,the what God tells us to put first,10400:07:58.620 --> 00:08:01.899we need to put first. OurFirst Ministry is to our family.10500:08:01.980 --> 00:08:05.579One of the things the Bible says, Mark Eight, verse thirty six.10600:08:07.540 --> 00:08:09.699What shall it profit a man ifhe gains the whole world but loses his10700:08:09.819 --> 00:08:13.329own soul? Right, that's that'syeah, Biblical reality. Right. I10800:08:13.410 --> 00:08:16.370would say, though, what doesit profit and minister if he or she10900:08:18.170 --> 00:08:22.129gains the whole world but loses theirown family? Right? Yeah, you11000:08:22.529 --> 00:08:26.329hear about pastors. I've read aboutpastors who have poured themselves out. As11100:08:26.329 --> 00:08:28.839a matter of fact, going throughthis subject and going through the points that11200:08:28.879 --> 00:08:33.559you laid out, I read severalarticles from different pastors that talked about their11300:08:33.639 --> 00:08:37.279experiences and neglecting their families and howGod dealt with them or what they've seen11400:08:37.519 --> 00:08:41.789other pastors lives, how they neglectedtheir family to go win the world,11500:08:41.509 --> 00:08:46.669and these are tragic stories where thesepastors pour themselves out for ministry. They11600:08:46.750 --> 00:08:52.309pour themselves out to minister to theircongregations, or build their churches or or11700:08:52.389 --> 00:08:56.220whatever. Yeah, and it goesinto the corporate world to where people try11800:08:56.259 --> 00:09:00.019to gain the whole world. Theytry, they maybe try to win everybody11900:09:00.139 --> 00:09:05.259to Jesus. Are you try towhatever, win that corporate title or whatever12000:09:05.340 --> 00:09:07.860it might be, and you loseyour family? You fail. Yeah,12100:09:09.259 --> 00:09:11.610but the balance of work and familyis universal. In this case we're talking12200:09:11.610 --> 00:09:15.769about the work being ministry, butit I think it's true of everyone on12300:09:15.889 --> 00:09:20.129earth that that holds down a joband has a family at home that there's12400:09:20.169 --> 00:09:22.529going to be that that struggle,yeah, between making time for your family12500:09:22.610 --> 00:09:28.679and and time for the ministry.Yeah, so, and and you know,12600:09:28.759 --> 00:09:33.279if you're not teaching your family aboutthe word of God, then you12700:09:33.399 --> 00:09:39.149know you've lost your very first ministrythat God has commanded. I mean,12800:09:39.230 --> 00:09:43.269think about it. you go outto in our ministry context, it's the12900:09:43.350 --> 00:09:46.509sidewalk out an abortion center and youwin souls for Jesus and you see people13000:09:48.029 --> 00:09:50.950getting saved, you see baby saved, and then you come home and just13100:09:52.070 --> 00:09:56.019completely neglect to teach your children theBible. Yeah, completely neglect to spend13200:09:56.059 --> 00:09:58.620time with them. And yet you'respending time out on the sidewalk. You'R13300:09:58.860 --> 00:10:03.779more people that you don't even know. Right, yeah, Biblical truths that13400:10:03.059 --> 00:10:05.779you've had sown in your heart,and yet you don't. So there's biblical13500:10:05.820 --> 00:10:09.850trees in the hearts of your children. Are you really are you really doing13600:10:09.929 --> 00:10:13.610what God has called you to do? So, yeah, if you have13700:10:13.730 --> 00:10:18.529to neglect your family to minister toother people, then your balance is way13800:10:18.570 --> 00:10:22.559off, right. Sure. Yeah. Yeah, and and one of the13900:10:22.679 --> 00:10:30.759things I think it isn't important tosay that is that you should not forego14000:10:31.080 --> 00:10:37.470ministry when they are imperfections in yourfamily, because there is no perfect family14100:10:39.029 --> 00:10:43.710and you are not going to perfectlystrike this balance. No one will,14200:10:43.990 --> 00:10:48.190outside of Heaven. None of uswill perfectly strike that balance. And so14300:10:48.909 --> 00:10:54.419that leads then kind of into ourthird point. Yeah, right, yeah,14400:10:54.860 --> 00:10:58.940the third point is don't use familystruggles as an excuse for an action14500:11:00.100 --> 00:11:03.059in ministry. And we've seen that. Yeah, I've been tempted to be14600:11:03.139 --> 00:11:07.450there myself. Yeah, what canhappen? So our first ministry is to14700:11:07.529 --> 00:11:11.730our family. If we have toneglect our family family to do ministry,14800:11:11.809 --> 00:11:18.009Whatever that ministry might be, especiallyin ministry, as necessary as being out14900:11:18.009 --> 00:11:22.600there as intense as been out,they're on the sidewalk and again, we're15000:11:22.600 --> 00:11:24.879not doing what God has called usto do if we have to neglect our15100:11:24.919 --> 00:11:31.200family for that. However, thisis a very important ministry, right.15200:11:31.320 --> 00:11:33.950This is a this is a necessaryministry and we've been called to it.15300:11:35.110 --> 00:11:37.870We've been called to it and we'retalking life and death right. So,15400:11:39.110 --> 00:11:43.029just because there's some struggle with littlejohnny at home because he's not doing his15500:11:43.190 --> 00:11:46.259homework or, you know, whateverit might be, or even misses you,15600:11:46.379 --> 00:11:50.139or maybe missages you because you're notthere for, you know, all15700:11:50.259 --> 00:11:54.700the hours that Johnny really wants youthere. Again, there's that tension.15800:11:54.899 --> 00:11:58.539It is that there's that tension.I mean, I've had I'll just share15900:11:58.620 --> 00:12:03.529personally that when my oldest daughter wasreally young, she did softball and she16000:12:03.649 --> 00:12:09.649had softball and I think it wasmost Saturdays she would have softball games.16100:12:09.090 --> 00:12:13.970At that point I was working afulltime job doing hardwood floors ry, but16200:12:15.129 --> 00:12:18.639also on Saturdays I would come outand do ministry on the sidewalks and at16300:12:18.679 --> 00:12:22.360that time there was very few Christiansout there on the sidewalk, very few16400:12:22.360 --> 00:12:26.440people that were there, and therewould be some days where there would be16500:12:26.840 --> 00:12:30.830I don't know, Sixty, seventypeople there for an abortion, to kill16600:12:30.870 --> 00:12:33.990their babies, and you would haveyou we're almost the only person. There16700:12:33.029 --> 00:12:37.629were times when it was just meand another guy. Yeah, there were16800:12:37.710 --> 00:12:41.230times when there were more than ahandful of people there and I praise God16900:12:41.269 --> 00:12:43.750for those times, but there weretimes when it was just me and one17000:12:43.789 --> 00:12:46.940other person. It's like there's thesebabies are going to die with out a17100:12:46.980 --> 00:12:50.299voice, and there were times inconversation with my wife where I let her17200:12:50.299 --> 00:12:54.500know I've got to be there.I just can't. I can't leave those17300:12:54.539 --> 00:12:58.539babies, but that of without avoice, but I'm going to miss my17400:12:58.570 --> 00:13:01.370daughter's softball game. Yeah, thatwas tough. That was a tough decision.17500:13:03.009 --> 00:13:05.370Now, there were times when Iwas able to go and I went17600:13:05.529 --> 00:13:09.330every chance I could get. IfI had to leave maybe thirty minutes earlier17700:13:09.409 --> 00:13:11.850than I would normally leave from thesidewalk here to go to a softball game,17800:13:11.850 --> 00:13:16.360I would do it like I wasn'tjust negligent in that in that way,17900:13:16.519 --> 00:13:20.120but somebody had to give these babiesa voice and I made sure that18000:13:20.240 --> 00:13:22.720was very intentional about explaining to mydaughter why I was doing what I was18100:13:22.799 --> 00:13:26.360doing, not trying to guilt tripher and making her feel bad, you18200:13:26.399 --> 00:13:28.870know, for from want me theyor anything like that, but just explaining18300:13:28.950 --> 00:13:33.190to her while I'm going out thereon the sidewalk rather than coming to her18400:13:33.230 --> 00:13:35.309game, and of course, soonas I got home I would ask her18500:13:35.549 --> 00:13:39.029how, when you know, Imean hits, did you get things like18600:13:39.149 --> 00:13:41.740that. I'll be as involved aspossible, but I just share that as18700:13:41.740 --> 00:13:45.659a personal experience. Maybe you couldfault me for that. Maybe I should18800:13:45.659 --> 00:13:48.059have went to every softball game andshouldn't have went to the sidewalk. I'm18900:13:48.259 --> 00:13:52.019sure people would could fault me eitherway, but I did the best I19000:13:52.179 --> 00:13:56.250could in conversation with my wife,talking it through with my daughter, to19100:13:56.049 --> 00:14:01.169do what I could to minister andalso minister, to my family. And19200:14:01.210 --> 00:14:05.210I think that's a really key,really important point that you talked it over19300:14:05.330 --> 00:14:09.159with everyone involved and so that therewas a clear understanding of there's only one19400:14:09.200 --> 00:14:13.759of you and there are these verystrong competing forces and you were called by19500:14:13.840 --> 00:14:20.559God, got to be out there. So communicate with with everybody, yeah,19600:14:20.279 --> 00:14:24.990people in Ministry and with your familyabout the that tension and how can19700:14:26.190 --> 00:14:28.710how can you meet the needs.I know when I came on to to19800:14:28.870 --> 00:14:33.070help out with with cities for life, one of the things from the Gecko19900:14:33.190 --> 00:14:37.190that I said was I'm I'm goingto be a new grand mom and I20000:14:37.389 --> 00:14:45.139had aging parents and I knew thatthose family obligations were critical and important and20100:14:45.620 --> 00:14:50.820I voiced the concern immediately and graciouslywas it. Was Given the time to20200:14:50.940 --> 00:14:54.009go attend to those family needs whenI had to, but I did try20300:14:54.090 --> 00:14:58.330to limit it and probably limit itmore than if I didn't have a ministry20400:14:58.370 --> 00:15:05.809obligation. So there there is alwaysa tradeoff in a payoff. But we20500:15:05.889 --> 00:15:07.320are all kind of just struggling todo our best. But, and I20600:15:07.399 --> 00:15:11.399think it's useful for us to rememberthat and to know everybody, everybody shares.20700:15:11.440 --> 00:15:16.879Yeah, this this struggle. Absolutely, but but don't, don't use20800:15:16.159 --> 00:15:20.870the family issue as an excuse.Yeah, and be and I think that20900:15:20.950 --> 00:15:28.990that requires prayerful discernment, does wisdomfrom others being in the word yeah,21000:15:30.070 --> 00:15:33.309and and knowing when you're using itas as just an excuse to avoid what21100:15:33.509 --> 00:15:37.779is difficult. Yeah, there arecertainly times when there's issues in your family,21200:15:37.860 --> 00:15:41.100things that are going on, intimes when you need to minister to21300:15:41.220 --> 00:15:43.220your wife, your husband or kids. Yeah, that you can't be out21400:15:43.259 --> 00:15:50.009on the sidewalk, you can't beinvolved in some capacity. And certainly as21500:15:50.049 --> 00:15:52.370far as we're concerned with our localvolunteers here, we understand that. We21600:15:52.529 --> 00:15:56.809never want people to be guilted into coming out there whatever. We understand21700:15:56.809 --> 00:16:00.210that their first ministries to their family. Yeah, but again you have to21800:16:00.289 --> 00:16:03.720gage it before the Lord whether ornot it's becoming an excuse because, listen,21900:16:04.320 --> 00:16:08.600if there's any like, if there'sany ministry where you'd want an excuse22000:16:08.720 --> 00:16:11.559and not be out there, tobe able to give yourself a pass,22100:16:11.559 --> 00:16:15.559yeah, it'd be this ministry becauseit can be really intense and be really22200:16:15.720 --> 00:16:22.190heavy, expecially on those cold colddays or those hot hot days or,22300:16:22.990 --> 00:16:26.070you know, with all the strugglesthat are out there. So it so22400:16:26.190 --> 00:16:30.549be careful of that that you're notusing your family as an excuse. But22500:16:30.389 --> 00:16:37.860kind of another counterpoint to that isthat, because you see maybe division and22600:16:38.299 --> 00:16:45.019in a family or struggles in afamily, it might not be due to22700:16:45.139 --> 00:16:49.490there's a problem with an imbalance withyou and ministry. Yeah, it could22800:16:49.490 --> 00:16:55.289be due as something entirely different.Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Well,22900:16:55.370 --> 00:16:59.450I mean I've seen situations, andI know you have to with even local23000:16:59.490 --> 00:17:04.039volunteers, where maybe we have ayounger volunteer whose parents are not necessarily cool23100:17:04.079 --> 00:17:07.240with them being out on the sidewalk. Maybe their pro choice, their pro23200:17:07.279 --> 00:17:11.759abortion people. Yeah, or maybethe flip side. I know we've had23300:17:11.920 --> 00:17:15.910some folks that come out who havechildren who are older children, maybe in23400:17:15.910 --> 00:17:18.910their twenties or whatever, and havegone the way of the leftists. Yeah,23500:17:19.269 --> 00:17:22.710and they don't like their parents beout there. It's embarrassing for them23600:17:22.829 --> 00:17:26.950for their parents to be out therewhatever. Yeah, and so there's some23700:17:26.230 --> 00:17:30.900some tension even with them being outon the sidewalk in their families. And23800:17:30.140 --> 00:17:34.059Yeah, and Jesus talks about that. He says, you suppose this is23900:17:34.059 --> 00:17:38.099Luke, chapter twelve, verse fiftyone through fifty three. Do you suppose24000:17:38.140 --> 00:17:41.660that I came to grant peace onearth? I tell you no, but24100:17:41.779 --> 00:17:48.930rather division. From now on,family members in one household will be divided,24200:17:48.410 --> 00:17:53.250three against two and two against three. There will be divided father against24300:17:53.289 --> 00:17:57.640sons, son against father, motheragainst daughter, daughter against mother, Motherin24400:17:57.640 --> 00:18:00.160law against daughter in law, daughterin law against mother in law. So24500:18:00.279 --> 00:18:04.279there's going to be some division followingJesus is not always easy. As a24600:18:04.279 --> 00:18:07.279matter of fact, he said inthat previous verse that we read that it's24700:18:07.400 --> 00:18:12.430like taking up across and following him. Yeah, yeah, it's it's crucifixion.24800:18:12.509 --> 00:18:17.509Sometimes it's painful. Yes, painfulin your family. It's painful with24900:18:17.549 --> 00:18:22.430the tension that it can cause andwith the necessary struggles that you have to25000:18:22.549 --> 00:18:26.299go through to obey the Lord.Yeah, and how do you and what's25100:18:26.339 --> 00:18:30.259your guide there? Well, ifGod has called you, you certainly should25200:18:30.259 --> 00:18:34.980never be disobeying God because a familymember is unhappy, yeah, with what25300:18:36.140 --> 00:18:41.690you're doing. And and so areyou following God? Are you listening to25400:18:41.849 --> 00:18:45.369God? Are Are you faithfully doingwhat he has called you to do?25500:18:47.009 --> 00:18:52.650And if there is struggle and divisionand your family over that, then that25600:18:52.210 --> 00:18:56.960is what you still need to do. On the other hand, Satan can25700:18:57.359 --> 00:19:04.519be the cause of family struggle andand he, I think often does use25800:19:04.640 --> 00:19:11.549family struggle to prevent effective people frombeing out doing the ministry. Yeah,25900:19:11.589 --> 00:19:14.630that God has called them to do. Absolutely, the devil's going to try26000:19:14.630 --> 00:19:18.710to get in and so discord andconfusion and try to neutralize us as much26100:19:18.750 --> 00:19:23.740as he can. The devil doesnot want people out on that sidewalk bringing26200:19:23.779 --> 00:19:27.420a voice for those babies and bringingthe Gospel to that place of darkness.26300:19:27.819 --> 00:19:30.140And so he's going to try touse all kinds of things. And it26400:19:30.220 --> 00:19:34.099can be division within your family,it can be family struggles, even husband26500:19:34.140 --> 00:19:40.930and wife struggles. I mean beingout in ministry like this is it's a26600:19:40.970 --> 00:19:44.369conversation you need to have with yourhusband. I mean, hopefully. I26700:19:44.450 --> 00:19:48.490don't know of any volunteers currently thatwe have who's many of them are ladies26800:19:48.529 --> 00:19:52.759whose husbands are in disagreement with whatthey're doing. I don't think there's any26900:19:52.880 --> 00:19:56.559and I don't know how any could. Yeah, I mean certainly may not27000:19:56.680 --> 00:20:03.160be out there themselves, but toactively disagree with with their spouse, that27100:20:03.400 --> 00:20:07.630would be a very hard path.That would be a tough thing to do27200:20:07.829 --> 00:20:10.990with. And Yeah, and soif that's the situation with a person,27300:20:11.109 --> 00:20:14.630I would say that mean that needssome serious prayer. You still have to27400:20:14.750 --> 00:20:17.309obey the Lord. Let's say,you know, if you're you get a27500:20:17.349 --> 00:20:19.950husband who's not walking with God,who doesn't understand why in the world you27600:20:19.990 --> 00:20:23.099would be out on the sidewalk atan abortion center. I mean that's that's27700:20:23.099 --> 00:20:27.099quite the struggle to have yeah.However, does that necessarily mean that you27800:20:27.140 --> 00:20:30.220shouldn't be out there? I don'tthink so. No, not if God27900:20:30.259 --> 00:20:33.259has called you to be out therehere in obedience to God, I think28000:20:33.299 --> 00:20:37.849that takes precedence over family. Yeah, hard as that is. Yeah,28100:20:38.009 --> 00:20:45.089and and, and I guess beingable to figure out is, is this28200:20:45.289 --> 00:20:49.680what God is calling me to do? And if he is, am I28300:20:51.079 --> 00:20:52.839is? Am I doing what Ishould be doing? Because the Bible is28400:20:52.920 --> 00:20:57.119very clear that we are wives tosubmit to husband's yeah. Well, but28500:20:57.160 --> 00:21:00.720if your husband is saying don't dothis, yeah, don't, becomes that28600:21:02.240 --> 00:21:04.990become well, don't do this,submit to me, yeah, and then28700:21:06.069 --> 00:21:11.349that becomes again this tension of itfeels like a conflict in in what God28800:21:11.509 --> 00:21:17.869is is trying to say to you. Do I obey God? Do I28900:21:17.910 --> 00:21:22.619submit to my husband when they areat odds? Yeah, and what do29000:21:22.700 --> 00:21:26.019I do then? And I thinkthat kind of leads to our next point.29100:21:26.819 --> 00:21:30.140That and I know I have feltto the breaking point at times out29200:21:30.180 --> 00:21:33.529here. I think you have.I think all of us have at once29300:21:33.690 --> 00:21:37.730some points, because it's such adifficult ministry. But God will never ask29400:21:37.849 --> 00:21:42.049of you more than you can give. Yeah, you know, and this29500:21:42.769 --> 00:21:47.519kind of ties into something I alwayswant to try to touch on as I'm29600:21:47.519 --> 00:21:52.480dealing with new volunteers, bring anew volunteers out, is that if we're29700:21:52.519 --> 00:21:56.720driven by guilt, oftentimes we willtake ourselves beyond what God wants us to29800:21:56.759 --> 00:22:02.269do. And so we really haveto check our motivation for ministry because if29900:22:02.309 --> 00:22:07.750guilt is our driver, will knowreal quickly because we'll stretch ourselves beyond what30000:22:07.829 --> 00:22:10.430we can actually do it. Now, I know you've seen it when you30100:22:10.470 --> 00:22:14.430have a new volunteer come out andthey say this is a great ministry,30200:22:14.430 --> 00:22:15.180I need to be involved in this, I'm going to be out here every30300:22:15.180 --> 00:22:18.380day, and we always tell them, hey, put the brakes on for30400:22:18.420 --> 00:22:21.460a second. Yeah, we don'twant you out here every day. Right.30500:22:21.500 --> 00:22:23.099We actually one day is good.What? When? When? Is30600:22:23.339 --> 00:22:29.500Good? That's enough, because thespiritual warfare, the play on your mind30700:22:29.619 --> 00:22:33.849and your heart, your emotions ofvery emotional ministry to watch moms go in30800:22:33.930 --> 00:22:36.490there and kill their children. Know, that's the reality it's having right in30900:22:36.529 --> 00:22:40.490front of your face. Yeah,anyway, the point is when somebody takes31000:22:40.569 --> 00:22:45.039that I appreciate the zeal. Well, somebody takes that kind of mentality that31100:22:45.079 --> 00:22:48.400I'm going to be out here everyday. To me it's an indication they're31200:22:48.440 --> 00:22:52.119probably driven by guilt rather than alove for the Lord and they will quickly31300:22:52.240 --> 00:22:56.240burn out and they will go frombeing filled with zeal to being broken pretty31400:22:56.240 --> 00:23:00.630quickly. I think that that oftenhappens in they're the ones that melt away.31500:23:00.950 --> 00:23:06.430So there's there's a wonderful verse inas Ay of forty two three that31600:23:06.509 --> 00:23:11.430I know is a verse that thatyou have quoted often. Yeah, and31700:23:11.309 --> 00:23:15.500you want me to read that one? Yeah, a bruised read he will31800:23:15.539 --> 00:23:18.579not break. In a faintly burningwick he will not quench. He will31900:23:18.660 --> 00:23:22.940faithfully bring forth justice. So abruised read, he will not break.32000:23:22.980 --> 00:23:27.809We can. We can be stretched. God will stretch us out on and32100:23:27.970 --> 00:23:30.609I think that's an important point.We're not saying that. You know,32200:23:30.690 --> 00:23:34.730there's this. It's a biblical mentality. The Lord never puts on you.32300:23:34.849 --> 00:23:37.490You know, the Bible says Godit will not allow you to be tempted32400:23:37.529 --> 00:23:41.680beyond what you can bear. Right. That's a biblical reality. And some32500:23:41.759 --> 00:23:45.000people will say God will never puton you more than you can handle.32600:23:45.680 --> 00:23:48.960God will put on You more thanyou can handle in your own strength,32700:23:48.400 --> 00:23:52.599but he won't put on You morethan you can handle in the strength that32800:23:52.680 --> 00:23:55.519he supplies. Right, yeah,yeah, one of the things I say32900:23:55.640 --> 00:23:59.789that God is not an Egyptian taskmaster telling us to make bricks without Straw.33000:23:59.789 --> 00:24:02.910All right, you know the storyin Moses time, the Egyptian task33100:24:02.990 --> 00:24:06.829masters told the children of Israel andmake bricks without Straw's impossible, like you33200:24:06.869 --> 00:24:10.700can do that? Yeah, andso God's not asking you to do that.33300:24:10.859 --> 00:24:14.299God's not asking you to come outon the sidewalk every day of the33400:24:14.420 --> 00:24:18.339week because of some wonderful thing thatyou have in yourself. I mean,33500:24:18.380 --> 00:24:21.859first of all, we have toput ourselves in our place. We're not33600:24:21.980 --> 00:24:25.289that wonderful, right. We needa race of God. The case at33700:24:25.329 --> 00:24:27.089Lea, it's outside is the Lord. We're not wonderful at all. Yeah.33800:24:29.369 --> 00:24:32.009Now, God's grace is on youif you're a Christian and God's Word33900:24:32.130 --> 00:24:34.009is in you, right, andyou want to bring his word to that34000:24:34.170 --> 00:24:40.839place of death and destruction. Butthe point here is that we oftentimes can34100:24:40.920 --> 00:24:45.400put things on ourselves, or otherpeople can put things on us that make34200:24:45.480 --> 00:24:48.559us feel like we should go beyondwhat God's really called us to. So34300:24:48.880 --> 00:24:51.000if you're out there on the sidewalk, you know, let's say, like34400:24:51.160 --> 00:24:53.470many of our volunteers, you're ahomeschool mom and you're trying to teach your34500:24:53.470 --> 00:24:57.750kids and you want to teach themeffectively and you want to teach them all34600:24:57.789 --> 00:25:00.990the things that they need to know. And yet you're going to be out34700:25:00.990 --> 00:25:04.029on the sidewalk because you're driven byguilt, five days a week. How34800:25:04.069 --> 00:25:07.339are you going to do that?You know, you putting more on yourself34900:25:07.500 --> 00:25:11.140than God's actually put on your firstministry to your family. Do that and35000:25:11.299 --> 00:25:14.299then, like one of our volunteers, she brings her kids out on the35100:25:14.380 --> 00:25:17.299sidewalk with it right. Yeah,and they serve together. She does that35200:25:17.619 --> 00:25:21.339really faithfully. Well, so weekit's something she can do. I think35300:25:21.420 --> 00:25:25.890what she's doing is actually a goodexample of being stretched by God, because35400:25:26.009 --> 00:25:30.329it is not easy being out therewith three young children on a street where35500:25:30.450 --> 00:25:37.680traffic is so so she's stretched,but she she keeps it to a reasonable35600:25:37.720 --> 00:25:40.960amount of time so that she isnot broken, it does not become too35700:25:41.000 --> 00:25:44.799much. She can still minister toher family. But I think we kind35800:25:44.839 --> 00:25:49.230of blended into check check your motivation? Yeah, absolutely, because if guilt35900:25:49.390 --> 00:25:52.950is what's motivating you, then youwill be broken. Eventually, you will36000:25:52.950 --> 00:25:56.829be broken. You will not wantto be out there anymore because it does36100:25:56.910 --> 00:26:00.670not sustain yeah. So what isour motivation? We our motivation first and36200:26:00.750 --> 00:26:03.500foremost should be a love for God. Yeah, that's God to be our36300:26:03.500 --> 00:26:08.220driving motivation and we hit that thatpoint home with our sidewalk missionaries, we36400:26:08.259 --> 00:26:12.460hit that point home with our sidewalkvolunteers, we hit that point home with36500:26:12.579 --> 00:26:17.099ourselves. Right, we've got tobe driven by love for God, and36600:26:17.140 --> 00:26:19.690that's why I think we did apodcast some months ago, maybe even the36700:26:19.730 --> 00:26:25.170beginning of doing podcasts, where wetalked about this dynamic, that we can't36800:26:25.170 --> 00:26:29.529be driven by hatred for abortion,we can't be driven by hatred for plan36900:26:29.650 --> 00:26:33.759parenthood, we can't be driven ourmotivation cannot be the horror of abortion.37000:26:33.200 --> 00:26:37.480It has to be the glory ofJesus, has to be our love for37100:26:37.559 --> 00:26:41.400him. Out of that flows ourlove for our neighbors who we can't even37200:26:41.440 --> 00:26:45.240be driven by our love for ourneighbor, for these babies and for these37300:26:45.279 --> 00:26:48.670MOMS, we have to be drivenfirst and foremost by love for God and37400:26:48.789 --> 00:26:52.349it keeps things in their proper order. Yeah, and when you're saying you37500:26:52.430 --> 00:26:55.829can't be driven them by guilt inministry, I think that is true.37600:26:55.869 --> 00:26:59.390Also, you can't be driven,for spending time with your family, by37700:26:59.430 --> 00:27:03.059guilty either. And again that setsup tension, because I think guilt does37800:27:03.220 --> 00:27:08.460come as we feel like I shouldbe spending more time with with my answer37900:27:08.579 --> 00:27:14.059or husbander's or wife or whatever.So, but but the same principle applies.38000:27:14.380 --> 00:27:18.369Guilt is not what should be yourmotivator in your time with God or38100:27:18.450 --> 00:27:21.450in your time with family or inyour time with ministry. It should be38200:27:21.769 --> 00:27:26.009an outflowing of love. I willsay, because I'm not one to say38300:27:26.769 --> 00:27:30.559I know modern Christians kind of saythis sort of thing, that guilt is38400:27:30.599 --> 00:27:33.400a bad thing, guilt is sucha good thing and that the guilt should38500:27:33.400 --> 00:27:37.000never be employed or whatever. I'mnot want to agree with that. Yeah,38600:27:37.119 --> 00:27:41.400I will say, and you candisagree me with me if you want38700:27:41.400 --> 00:27:45.509to, but I think you'll agreethat guilt can be a good initial motivate.38800:27:45.670 --> 00:27:47.670Can get you out there, itcan get you out on the Sune,38900:27:47.750 --> 00:27:51.309get you beyond your comfort zone.Yeah, to start with, when39000:27:51.349 --> 00:27:55.430I think you stain you. Yeah, it's maybe a good initial motivator,39100:27:55.470 --> 00:28:00.019yeah, but it's a horrible sustainer. Guilt cannot sustain you. If you're39200:28:00.099 --> 00:28:03.339sustained by guilt in any ministry thatyou're involved in, but especially this ministry,39300:28:03.819 --> 00:28:07.180then you're going to crash and burn. Yeah, you're either going to39400:28:07.220 --> 00:28:11.019go completely off the rails and goberserk or just going to be completely neutralized.39500:28:11.099 --> 00:28:14.369Guilt cannot sustain you. So itmight get you out there and listen39600:28:14.529 --> 00:28:18.730the reality that we've murdered sixty fivemillion of our own children in the womb39700:28:18.769 --> 00:28:22.410in the United States of America andthe Church of Jesus Christ had been largely39800:28:22.450 --> 00:28:27.359checked out on this issue for thepast forty what, almost five years?39900:28:27.440 --> 00:28:32.359Forty five years or so. Yeah, that should make us feel guilty.40000:28:32.400 --> 00:28:36.960Pastors should be guilty for not shouldfeel guilty for not saying something about the40100:28:37.079 --> 00:28:41.710issue of abortion. But that guiltshould lead to action and that guilt should40200:28:41.710 --> 00:28:45.910not be what we take as oursustain or it should be maybe an initial40300:28:45.950 --> 00:28:52.509motivator, but our sustaining power,are sustaining focus should be a love for40400:28:52.589 --> 00:28:55.309God. Yeah, and it's alsoto me, when I was saying guilty40500:28:55.430 --> 00:28:59.500is good. I do believe thatguilty is God's method of getting our attention40600:28:59.819 --> 00:29:03.619and saying something's wrong here and youneed to do something about it. And40700:29:03.700 --> 00:29:07.460and so guilt can be very usefulif you pay attention to those feelings of40800:29:07.539 --> 00:29:11.089guilt and if there's something you canrectify, you better. Yeah, but40900:29:11.890 --> 00:29:18.089but don't let it be what whatkeeps you continuing on in any ministry,41000:29:18.170 --> 00:29:22.009for family or for God. Socheck your motivation. Check your motivation for41100:29:22.329 --> 00:29:26.240for ministry. Yeah, this,this next point actually was a point that41200:29:26.640 --> 00:29:30.400you had voiced, I guess,probably when I first asked you to come41300:29:30.519 --> 00:29:34.960on with cities for life and kindof a full time capacity. Yeah,41400:29:36.119 --> 00:29:38.789you talked about some boundaries, right, and setting boundaries, and one of41500:29:38.789 --> 00:29:41.710the things you told me is,and tell me, correct me if I'm41600:29:41.750 --> 00:29:45.990wrong with this, but you saidI'm just a boundary upset with me and41700:29:45.069 --> 00:29:48.029my husband and my family, isthat if a mom needs a place to41800:29:48.069 --> 00:29:52.859stay, we cannot have them livingat our house. Yeah, we can't41900:29:52.900 --> 00:29:56.220do that, because I know thatI can't. I can't do it now.42000:29:56.259 --> 00:29:57.940Other people may be able to.Yeah, but you a again,42100:29:57.980 --> 00:30:02.140correct me if I'm wrong, ifI'm speaking for you, but I can't42200:30:02.180 --> 00:30:04.779do what I'm doing out here onthe sidewalk and be able to minister to42300:30:04.859 --> 00:30:10.769these women effectively in my home.Yeah, I need kind of myspaceet.42400:30:10.890 --> 00:30:15.609I reeded, a place where Iknew I could let it all go and42500:30:15.970 --> 00:30:21.289and that without that I would literallylose my mind. I knew that.42600:30:21.680 --> 00:30:25.279Yeah, that was never an issue. I said other boundaries to I said42700:30:25.319 --> 00:30:30.079I would never do Saturdays. Yeah, I let that boundary go. But42800:30:30.240 --> 00:30:33.559but other I mean there are physicalboundaries, as you know. As I42900:30:33.640 --> 00:30:38.309get older, there there are definitelythings I can't do that I could do43000:30:38.509 --> 00:30:42.190when I was younger, physical things, just like lifting the speaker. Yeah,43100:30:42.190 --> 00:30:47.710I just can't do it. Andthat is part of our our ministry,43200:30:47.869 --> 00:30:49.740and someone has to do it andif I don't, someone else does43300:30:49.940 --> 00:30:53.180have to do it. Yeah,and that could cause guilt. But I43400:30:53.339 --> 00:30:56.980thought that's why it was this wassuch important point to make. There is43500:30:57.220 --> 00:31:02.700reality, yes, Andy, andyou need to know your boundaries and your43600:31:02.819 --> 00:31:07.369limitations and you need to be openabout them and not be fearful that they43700:31:07.450 --> 00:31:11.569will not be received. The theof course, the last place where you43800:31:11.609 --> 00:31:17.049should be fearful that that your realisticboundaries would not be received in a it's43900:31:17.170 --> 00:31:21.920in a Christian ministry. You wouldhope that people would be understanding and receptive44000:31:22.079 --> 00:31:26.279to so. But I think itis very important as soon as you're becoming44100:31:26.319 --> 00:31:30.319involved in ministry, set those boundaries, tell whoever you're being involved with,44200:31:30.480 --> 00:31:34.829whoever you're over serious whatever, thatthis is what I can do and these44300:31:34.869 --> 00:31:38.750are some things I just really cannotand I think that does play into what44400:31:38.829 --> 00:31:42.549we talked about just a few minutesago and the amount of days that you44500:31:42.589 --> 00:31:45.509can actually come out, because Iknow that, if you know, if44600:31:45.549 --> 00:31:49.059I had somebody, we've got acouple of volunteers that come out multiple days.44700:31:49.099 --> 00:31:52.779Yeah, and I don't tell themnot to. They seem to be44800:31:53.619 --> 00:31:56.740doing pretty well coming out like theydo, and I don't see them being44900:31:56.859 --> 00:32:01.410spent physically, emotionally or mentally orwhatever, and they seem to be doing45000:32:01.450 --> 00:32:05.089well. So I'm not going totell him to stop doing that. Right,45100:32:05.490 --> 00:32:07.210but I know in ministry, whenyou got people that are willing,45200:32:07.329 --> 00:32:10.849it's like, if you're willing,I'll well you share, put your feet45300:32:10.890 --> 00:32:15.250out there on the sidewalk, andso you've got to even set those boundaries45400:32:15.289 --> 00:32:19.079in your mind and you're coming outin volunteering or you're coming out into ministry45500:32:19.119 --> 00:32:21.880and some kind of full time capacity, you've got set those boundaries in your45600:32:21.880 --> 00:32:24.640mind, talk about it with yourwife or your husband and then make sure45700:32:24.680 --> 00:32:29.359that those are voiced right up frontwith the leadership of the ministry. Yeah,45800:32:29.480 --> 00:32:31.269I can only do one day aweek. I know that it might45900:32:31.309 --> 00:32:36.349seem, I mean, especially ifyou're a retired person or whatever, it46000:32:36.750 --> 00:32:38.990might seem to have all this likehave all this extra time on my hands46100:32:39.029 --> 00:32:43.190and maybe I should be out heremore than I then then I am,46200:32:43.750 --> 00:32:45.819but this is as far as I'mable to go right now, and so46300:32:46.019 --> 00:32:50.180just setting that as an expectation rightoff, right off the bat, I46400:32:50.220 --> 00:32:52.779think, is hell. Yeah,I think or two and and when I46500:32:52.859 --> 00:32:55.099mentioned this Saturday thing, I actuallymentioned that for a reason. Well,46600:32:55.700 --> 00:33:00.569later on I discovered, you know, Saturdays are not as bad as I46700:33:00.769 --> 00:33:06.490thought and I actually have come toagain with some boundaries on how much time46800:33:06.490 --> 00:33:09.210I'm out there on Saturdays. NowI do do Saturday's Saturday. So setting46900:33:09.250 --> 00:33:15.759boundaries from the beginning doesn't mean thatthose boundaries might not shift or change sure47000:33:15.039 --> 00:33:19.559down the road. And you know, give yourself license to do so,47100:33:19.759 --> 00:33:22.319but it helps from the get goif there are actual limitations, that those47200:33:22.400 --> 00:33:25.880have been said. One know,one of the things you talking about Saturdays,47300:33:27.150 --> 00:33:30.990on Saturday mornings. One of thethings that make Saturday's difficult is the47400:33:30.029 --> 00:33:34.309fact that our teams get out thereso early. It's so cold. Yeah,47500:33:34.589 --> 00:33:37.630I get out there on Saturday morningsabout forty five to try to get47600:33:37.670 --> 00:33:42.619set up. The birds aren't evenyeah right, the abortion clinic opens at47700:33:42.700 --> 00:33:45.940seven on Saturdays. So it's cold. And for you that's just one of47800:33:45.980 --> 00:33:51.140those physical limitations that you have.Cold weather doesn't work so well in your47900:33:51.619 --> 00:33:55.569in your circumstance. Yeah, thewe your body operates. I guess some48000:33:55.769 --> 00:34:00.329excuse that you make there, I'msure. Well, also, it's five48100:34:00.410 --> 00:34:05.289hours. That that's the other thingis the the seven o'clock people. At48200:34:05.329 --> 00:34:08.250least you and I are there forat least five hours, sometimes six.48300:34:08.369 --> 00:34:14.760That's a long time to be inthe cold and and but you know,48400:34:14.920 --> 00:34:17.519sometimes it's okay, sometimes it's okayand I've learned that. Okay, this48500:34:17.599 --> 00:34:21.800is a boundary I can bend alittle, not not regularly, but I48600:34:21.920 --> 00:34:27.070can bend it a little. Soso learning to say no and being comfortable48700:34:27.110 --> 00:34:31.429saying no and that that falls onleadership to yea that have have we made48800:34:31.590 --> 00:34:37.389our volunteers feel that they can say, I just can't do that. And48900:34:38.539 --> 00:34:43.820as as a volunteer, and nowI'm in a leadership position, but I49000:34:44.500 --> 00:34:49.780have been and still am a volunteerfor for quite some time and I know49100:34:49.900 --> 00:34:54.210I never, I was never puton a guilt trip or all I ever49200:34:54.369 --> 00:34:59.769heard from people in charge, whichwas you, basically was okay, that's49300:34:59.769 --> 00:35:04.250fine, thanks for letting me know. And so that made it easier to49400:35:04.289 --> 00:35:08.199say no when I had to sayno. So, but then the counterpoint49500:35:08.239 --> 00:35:13.639to that, if God is urgingyou say yes. Yeah. Learned to49600:35:13.719 --> 00:35:16.480say yes to and don't let fear, I think, is usually the main49700:35:16.599 --> 00:35:22.989reason in our ministry when people don'tsay yes, is they're afraid of what49800:35:22.150 --> 00:35:28.230that will entail. Sure. So, if God's telling you to, then49900:35:28.510 --> 00:35:32.829learn to say yes. Yeah.So our next one. So the next50000:35:32.909 --> 00:35:39.420point is to be intentional about reservingtime for family. Yeah, and because50100:35:39.420 --> 00:35:45.099we're talking about balancing family and ministry, and then again we're dealing with an50200:35:45.099 --> 00:35:51.050intense ministry, there is the ability, I know, just for me coming50300:35:51.090 --> 00:35:55.090home from ministring out on the sidewalk. On Saturdays, especially in Saturdays,50400:35:55.369 --> 00:35:59.530are the days that most people spendtime with their family in particular. You50500:35:59.610 --> 00:36:01.489know, you're working during the weekor whatever. It's easy for me just50600:36:01.610 --> 00:36:05.280to come and lay on the couchand check out, and I actually do50700:36:05.400 --> 00:36:09.000do that a lot. However,there are times when I just need to50800:36:09.079 --> 00:36:13.920spend time with my family. Thereare times when one of my son's,50900:36:13.960 --> 00:36:17.119my youngest son, actually wants tocome up to me and play with Legos51000:36:17.199 --> 00:36:21.550and I really don't want to,but I make myself do it. Your51100:36:21.789 --> 00:36:25.349prime activity and I'm so worn outand engage in my mind and something other51200:36:25.429 --> 00:36:30.789than just taking a nap or whatever, just mindless. Is Really, really51300:36:30.829 --> 00:36:34.860hard, but I try to beintentional about doing that. Yeah, but51400:36:35.019 --> 00:36:37.820not even that. I mean lengthytime with your family, taking a vacation,51500:36:37.860 --> 00:36:43.340spending some time away from ministry canbe very important. Jesus did that51600:36:43.659 --> 00:36:47.090himself. Yeah, in Mark ChapterOne, I think in Luke Chapter Five,51700:36:47.130 --> 00:36:51.730it talks about the same thing.And this is Mark Chapter One.51800:36:51.809 --> 00:36:54.409This is right after like a boatloadof people were coming to Jesus want to51900:36:54.489 --> 00:36:59.650be healed, demons cast out,all this. So he has ministry opportunities,52000:36:59.730 --> 00:37:02.880right, he's got people knocking atthe door to come and or for52100:37:04.519 --> 00:37:07.679him to do ministry to them,to Minister to their needs. And he52200:37:07.760 --> 00:37:10.079always did. I mean he alwaysdid. He always had a ministry need.52300:37:10.599 --> 00:37:15.949Yeah, so it says it inin the early morning, while it52400:37:15.030 --> 00:37:19.389was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went away to52500:37:19.469 --> 00:37:22.150a secluded place and was praying there. Now, you might ask, what52600:37:22.269 --> 00:37:25.710does this have to do with family? Well, Jesus didn't have a wife52700:37:27.230 --> 00:37:30.260and kids, but he did havehis heavenly father. That's the relationship that52800:37:30.340 --> 00:37:35.739he was cultivating, his closest relationship. Your closest relationships should be with your52900:37:35.780 --> 00:37:38.619family. And so he goes alone, even in the midst of ministry needs.53000:37:39.460 --> 00:37:43.500So again we're talking about balance.Even in the midst of ministry needs,53100:37:43.980 --> 00:37:46.329Jesus slipped away, yeah, andspent time with his heavenly father.53200:37:46.369 --> 00:37:50.570Yeah, and it seems like itwas the regular pattern. Right, Jesus,53300:37:50.730 --> 00:37:57.090and I think a very important pointhere is the word intentional and thinking53400:37:57.650 --> 00:38:00.960being intentional. Will Look at lookat in that verse. In the early53500:38:01.199 --> 00:38:06.159morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up. You know,53600:38:06.320 --> 00:38:07.960Jesus had to be tired, Iassume. I don't know if God got53700:38:08.079 --> 00:38:12.559tired, but I was good.I mean he was human God and he's53800:38:12.599 --> 00:38:15.989got a human form. So youknow he's been tired. He's been ministering53900:38:15.190 --> 00:38:20.590to the multitude, and yet itwas in the early morning, while it54000:38:20.710 --> 00:38:23.110was still dark. When he getsup to pray to his heavenly father,54100:38:23.150 --> 00:38:30.659he intentionally sacrifice sleep time, yea, in order to spend time with his54200:38:30.860 --> 00:38:34.500father. So, in this case, to spend you could really look at54300:38:34.500 --> 00:38:37.099this both ways, in order tospend time with his family and in order54400:38:37.139 --> 00:38:40.650to spend time with his ministry,because they were really in Jesus's case.54500:38:40.929 --> 00:38:45.769Yeah, kind of one in thesame. But I know that for me54600:38:45.090 --> 00:38:52.170to be able to do all Ineed to do to prepare spiritually and physically54700:38:52.250 --> 00:38:54.409to be out on the SIDEBOOK,I have to get up while it's still54800:38:54.409 --> 00:38:59.079dark. I get up at five, and I didn't used to, but54900:38:59.159 --> 00:39:01.519I do now. I get upall the time out even now, even55000:39:01.519 --> 00:39:06.639when I'm not going to be outhere, and so I'm very intentional,55100:39:07.320 --> 00:39:10.710not so that I've time for myfamily, but so that I've time for55200:39:10.949 --> 00:39:15.750ministry that later on these things I'mdoing in the morning I won't have to55300:39:15.869 --> 00:39:19.909be doing later in the day,yeah, when I could be spending time55400:39:19.989 --> 00:39:24.500with my family. So I thinkit's it is important to schedule time to55500:39:24.739 --> 00:39:29.460really do management. Isn't bored.Yes, and if you are not intentional55600:39:29.860 --> 00:39:37.460in your scheduling of time with familyand with ministry, it will invariably be55700:39:37.780 --> 00:39:42.889encroached to pop yeah, absolutely so. I love checklist. checklists are the55800:39:43.010 --> 00:39:46.730way that I remain intentional. Yeah, and the checks of my time.55900:39:46.969 --> 00:39:51.010Doesn't it help? It does help. Yeah, helps you prioritize things,56000:39:51.090 --> 00:39:52.320it helps you to take care ofthose things that need to be taken care56100:39:52.360 --> 00:39:55.360of and put off those things thatdon't. Yeah. Yeah, yeah,56200:39:55.400 --> 00:39:59.880it tick lists or helpful, butthe intentionality, like you're talking about with56300:40:00.079 --> 00:40:02.559family, yeah, is important.It's not the motivation of the check mark56400:40:02.639 --> 00:40:07.550in the box. It's the motivationof I have just made time, I56500:40:07.989 --> 00:40:13.150have made intentional time, yeah,available for for what really matters. Yeah,56600:40:13.269 --> 00:40:17.670absolutely so. The our next pointis that ministry often can complement family.56700:40:17.710 --> 00:40:22.539We've kind of talked about about mostlyup into this point. That guish56800:40:22.619 --> 00:40:28.940ministry takes away from family, butthat certainly is not always the case and56900:40:29.420 --> 00:40:32.699and in some cases there's fan wholefamilies that do ministry together. Yeah,57000:40:32.940 --> 00:40:37.130yeah, absolutely. I mean Ibelieve that this ministry, the ministry on57100:40:37.210 --> 00:40:39.969the sidewalk out an abortion center,as crazy it might sound, as it57200:40:40.010 --> 00:40:45.210might sound as some of you guys, is actually an opportunity for family discipleship.57300:40:45.250 --> 00:40:49.809Yeah, you know, we talkabout with our kids that we should57400:40:49.969 --> 00:40:52.239love our neighbor as ourselves. Weshould love God love our neighbor. We57500:40:52.320 --> 00:40:55.719talked about the issue of abortion andhow terrible it is that lives are being57600:40:55.800 --> 00:41:00.199destroyed through abortion. And then ourkids know that abortions are taken place.57700:41:00.519 --> 00:41:05.230And yet, as Christians, ifwe're not doing anything about it, we're57800:41:05.309 --> 00:41:07.550really given a mixed message to ourkids. So if we bring our kids57900:41:07.590 --> 00:41:10.789out to an abortion center, Iknow I met a couple of weeks ago,58000:41:10.869 --> 00:41:14.030and I'm not sure if you wereout there was on a Saturday,58100:41:14.230 --> 00:41:16.869this wonderful family that came along.I think they had five kids or so,58200:41:17.389 --> 00:41:22.019and they brought their kids out.They saw in social media what's happening58300:41:22.059 --> 00:41:25.300out there, what our ministry isdoing out there, even the prayer walks58400:41:25.340 --> 00:41:28.460and all of that, and theywanted to bring their kids out and their58500:41:28.500 --> 00:41:34.210daughter has actually a burden to evenvolunteer out there now. So families like58600:41:34.329 --> 00:41:39.250that bless me because they're using thatthis ministry is an opportunity to disciple their58700:41:39.289 --> 00:41:43.289kids. And my family we dothe same thing. We bring our kids58800:41:43.289 --> 00:41:45.730out on a regular basis. Recentlywe have not in the past couple of58900:41:45.769 --> 00:41:50.480months. With covid and with ourcrazy pro abortion friends that we've can head59000:41:50.519 --> 00:41:52.280out there. Lately we've not broughtour kids out, but I plan to59100:41:52.320 --> 00:41:57.679bring them back out. It's aregular part of ministry in our family.59200:41:58.239 --> 00:42:00.789It's my wife actually ministers on thesidewalk as well. She's one of the59300:42:00.829 --> 00:42:06.030nurses on the mobiultra sound unit.Yeah, but my kids have come out59400:42:06.110 --> 00:42:09.789and held signs, even handed outliterature. They've done other things in ministry.59500:42:09.789 --> 00:42:13.989They've helped out even here in theoffice with certain things. Yeah,59600:42:14.070 --> 00:42:16.860and they help put together some ofour literature. So as a family we59700:42:16.980 --> 00:42:21.219can disciple our kids. As parents, as MOMS and dad's, we can59800:42:21.260 --> 00:42:23.500disciple our kids, but bring themthat on the sidewalk are involving them in59900:42:23.579 --> 00:42:27.820some kind of pro life ministry tohelp them grow in their walk with the60000:42:27.900 --> 00:42:30.329Lord. Yeah, you're living theGospel with them and and the wonderful thing60100:42:30.489 --> 00:42:36.010is they that removes a little bitof that tension of family time versus ministry60200:42:36.090 --> 00:42:39.690time, because it's both all andone. Absolutely so you and and it60300:42:39.809 --> 00:42:45.400can. I think I have seenmany large families like yours, the mets60400:42:45.440 --> 00:42:50.480kers come to mind, that dominister as a family out at the abortion60500:42:50.639 --> 00:42:58.320center and it seems to be abonding element for those families. It's something60600:42:58.400 --> 00:43:02.789that they all gather around and believein and it unifies. It's a joint60700:43:02.829 --> 00:43:09.989family purpose before God. So Ithink it's a really wonderful dynamic when that60800:43:10.070 --> 00:43:15.300happens. It doesn't happen with allfamilies. Sure I think you're really blessed60900:43:15.460 --> 00:43:20.739that it's true of yours and I'mwe don't want to make families where that's61000:43:20.780 --> 00:43:22.659not the case feel bad. Yeah, I mean I think that's something that61100:43:22.900 --> 00:43:27.449before the Lord, that a husbandand wife need to decide. I know61200:43:27.570 --> 00:43:30.449there are people who they don't wantto bring their kids out and have them61300:43:30.449 --> 00:43:34.210exposed to the craziness that happens onthe sidewalk right. I don't get them61400:43:34.329 --> 00:43:37.050for that. Yeah, I don'tfault them for that. You know your61500:43:37.130 --> 00:43:39.449kids better than I do. Youknow your family dynamic better than I do.61600:43:40.010 --> 00:43:44.480I do think it's a good opportunityfor family discipleship, but maybe some61700:43:44.599 --> 00:43:47.880families just aren't there, like theyjust don't see that fitting into their their61800:43:47.920 --> 00:43:52.159dynamic and and all of that.So, you know, bying, no61900:43:52.320 --> 00:43:57.949condemnation as far as that's concerned,but I do do encourage people to of62000:43:58.070 --> 00:44:00.710course, step beyond your comfort zone. We're not called to live in our62100:44:00.750 --> 00:44:04.389comfort zone. We're called to livein obedience to the Lord. So if62200:44:04.389 --> 00:44:07.670it's just a comfort zone thing,I would say that would be something I62300:44:07.750 --> 00:44:10.139would check my heart about. Right, because this is a good opportunity for62400:44:10.860 --> 00:44:17.539for family ministry and for discipleship.And I know many youngsters in a pro62500:44:17.739 --> 00:44:22.139life family that all common minister togethercan't wait to be out here. Yeah,62600:44:22.380 --> 00:44:27.690so they see the importance, theysee things that they really are drawn62700:44:27.849 --> 00:44:32.849to in ministry and I think it'ssuch a wonderful way to have a child62800:44:32.969 --> 00:44:37.090grow up in the Lord. Yeah, for for some families, like you62900:44:37.210 --> 00:44:40.079said, not for all. Yeah. So there's a scripture and you guys63000:44:40.159 --> 00:44:45.079listen probably know this scripture about HeartDeuteronomy, chapter six, versus six and63100:44:45.159 --> 00:44:49.599seven, and this is the Lord'scommand to the children of Israel to teach63200:44:51.079 --> 00:44:54.630the men in particular, to teachtheir children the ways of God and the63300:44:54.670 --> 00:44:59.710Law of God, and says thesewords, which I shall command you today,63400:44:59.750 --> 00:45:01.190or which I'm commanding you today,shall be on your heart. You63500:45:01.269 --> 00:45:06.150shall teach them diligently to your sonsand you shall talk of them when you63600:45:06.269 --> 00:45:08.179sit in your house and when youwalk by the way, when you lie63700:45:08.219 --> 00:45:12.860down and when you rise up.So basically, wherever you're gone, you're63800:45:12.860 --> 00:45:15.539supposed to be teaching the word ofGod. So, whether you take your63900:45:15.539 --> 00:45:19.820kids away and you're intentional about havingsome time away with family, still need64000:45:19.860 --> 00:45:22.610to be teaching your kids the wordof God. Right you're sitting at the64100:45:22.849 --> 00:45:24.650dinner table, still need to beteaching your kids the word of God.64200:45:24.730 --> 00:45:28.690When you take him out to theabortion mill, you should be teaching them64300:45:28.730 --> 00:45:31.010the word of God. And theseare different yeah, these are different scenarios64400:45:31.050 --> 00:45:36.320in which you can teach different facetsof God's Word and God's truths. Amen.64500:45:36.719 --> 00:45:38.000So the last one, ten,I don't know if you've been keeping64600:45:38.079 --> 00:45:42.840count. Yes, it's number ten. Is like ten, good round number.64700:45:42.880 --> 00:45:47.920Yeah, it is so. Sodon't take responsibility for what you cannot64800:45:49.119 --> 00:45:52.989control, and that, I think, eliminates a lot of the stress of64900:45:53.150 --> 00:45:58.150ministry and of family. There arethings you just really have to let go65000:45:58.230 --> 00:46:02.030of because she can't control them.There are sometimes so many hours you're going65100:46:02.070 --> 00:46:09.699to be happying to put towards ministryand there are often limitations and how much65200:46:09.739 --> 00:46:13.980time you can spend with your family. Yeah, so you control which can65300:46:14.980 --> 00:46:19.369and the others you give to God. Yeah. Yeah, and I'll say65400:46:19.409 --> 00:46:22.730this too, as far as inlight of family struggles and all of that65500:46:22.849 --> 00:46:25.889other stuff, because I know thereare some fathers and some some mothers who65600:46:27.210 --> 00:46:30.010have kids maybe that have gone astray. Yeah, maybe they're not walking with65700:46:30.090 --> 00:46:34.840the Lord and you might feel likewell, if I can't, like I65800:46:34.920 --> 00:46:37.239said earlier, if you if youlose your kids, what does it?65900:46:37.519 --> 00:46:39.960Does it matter if you gain thewhole world and lose your family? Right,66000:46:40.039 --> 00:46:43.599so, maybe you're in that stateand that hit you a little hard66100:46:43.639 --> 00:46:45.039and you're like, well, mykids aren't walking with the Lord and so66200:46:45.199 --> 00:46:49.829therefore I'm I'm like worthless. No, I'm not saying that and I'm not66300:46:50.070 --> 00:46:53.789trying to with that statement, tryingto to let the enemy use God's word66400:46:53.869 --> 00:46:58.630to neutralize you. Because you needto pour in your kids, you need66500:46:58.670 --> 00:47:01.539to do everything you can to bringyour kids, bring your family to the66600:47:01.699 --> 00:47:06.820Lord, but you don't have controlover their hearts. Like, I know66700:47:07.099 --> 00:47:09.940good families. I know families whopoured into their kids. They did everything66800:47:09.980 --> 00:47:14.940they possibly could to pour in theirkids and their kids went astray. MMM,66900:47:15.730 --> 00:47:17.610and I'm not going to say justbecause your kids went astray, you67000:47:17.650 --> 00:47:21.489can't be out on the sidewalk.To me, that's just not right.67100:47:21.530 --> 00:47:27.969I don't think it's biblical either.So you don't take responsibility for things that67200:47:28.090 --> 00:47:30.840you can't control. If you're ahorrible parent, okay, that's one thing,67300:47:30.920 --> 00:47:34.719but if you did everything you couldwithin your ability to bring your kids67400:47:34.760 --> 00:47:37.760to the Lord, that doesn't disqualifyyou for ministry. I mean, think67500:47:37.800 --> 00:47:42.360about it. God himself the bestfather of all. I was just going67600:47:42.400 --> 00:47:45.989to bring this up, the bestfather of all. Yeah, Lost Adam,67700:47:46.030 --> 00:47:50.909right, the first man that hecreated. Yeah, went astray.67800:47:51.309 --> 00:47:53.829Yeah, and didn't didn't walk withhim, rebelled against him. The only67900:47:53.869 --> 00:47:59.019command he gave him and he brokeit. Adam and Eve both straight from68000:47:59.179 --> 00:48:01.579from God and, believe, thedevil over over the Lord. It's two68100:48:01.659 --> 00:48:06.260first kids. Yeah, said theythey walked away, yeah, from his68200:48:06.539 --> 00:48:10.820clear command. So there's a dynamicand there's a real biblical importance for us68300:48:10.860 --> 00:48:15.050to focus on our families and toteach our children the word of God and68400:48:15.170 --> 00:48:20.170so in their lives the truths ofGod's word. But that doesn't mean we're68500:48:20.170 --> 00:48:22.329responsible for their souls in the sensethat we can change their hearts. You68600:48:22.409 --> 00:48:27.159can't make your kids give their heartsto Jesus. You can't make them continue68700:48:27.199 --> 00:48:30.280to walk with God. As muchas you want to, you can sow68800:48:30.320 --> 00:48:34.360into them the principles of God's Wordand ultimately it's between them of the Lord,68900:48:34.440 --> 00:48:36.639whether or not they walk with God. Yeah, and the way that69000:48:36.800 --> 00:48:39.519honors him. God could have forcedAdam and Eve to follow him, but69100:48:39.559 --> 00:48:43.789he didn't. He give them freewill. He gave them the opportunity to69200:48:43.949 --> 00:48:50.510rebel and to choose not him andand they did. So that that's true69300:48:50.550 --> 00:48:54.030for all of us as as parents. We do our best and our children69400:48:54.190 --> 00:48:59.420our free agents. There they havea free will and they can choose to69500:48:59.579 --> 00:49:02.579follow or not to follow. Yeah, so we can't control that we can't69600:49:02.619 --> 00:49:07.980control what what they will ultimately choose, but what we can control is is69700:49:08.579 --> 00:49:14.610that we have done all that wecan, under God, before God,69800:49:15.650 --> 00:49:19.170that he has commanded us to do, with Damn and with ministry. Yeah,69900:49:19.210 --> 00:49:22.969and then leave the results to God. Yeah, absolutely well with that.70000:49:23.400 --> 00:49:27.440We'll wrap this thing up. Soundgood? Yeah, all right.70100:49:27.519 --> 00:49:30.599Well, guys, we appreciate youtuning in and we appreciate if you,70200:49:30.679 --> 00:49:35.920guys, would share this podcast withyour friends. Let folks know what you70300:49:36.079 --> 00:49:39.829heard, share some feedback with us. Maybe there's subjects that we haven't covered70400:49:39.869 --> 00:49:43.909yet that you would like for usto cover, maybe subjects that we've all70500:49:44.070 --> 00:49:47.909already covered but we didn't cover thoroughlyenough for things this, questions that you70600:49:47.949 --> 00:49:52.110have about podcast that we've done inthe past, we'd love to hear from70700:49:52.190 --> 00:49:54.019you. You can reach out tome, Daniel at Love Life Dot Org.70800:49:54.539 --> 00:49:58.460You can reach her at Vicky atLove Life Dot Org. We'd love70900:49:58.539 --> 00:50:05.980to hear from you, but untilnext time, God bless give me our71000:50:06.300 --> 00:50:17.489love for love, give me ourlove for gratitude. I know it will71100:50:17.650 --> 00:50:27.119cost me my life. Nothing's tooprecious and some you